ABC Family: The FX of kids cable networks?

God, I always felt like such a prude kvetching about this. I discussed this with a friend of mine, and she made me feel like a prude for complaining about this. Then we watched ABC Family's new show, "Kyle XY," together, ...

... and she conceded I was right about this.

Based on the name of the cable network, you'd think ABC Family was a destination for the entire family, someplace you could watch safe programming for all ages. (Originally, it was known as Fox Family, and featured such well-considered series such as "State of Grace," which starred "Arrested Development's" Alia Shawkat as one of two girls who grappled, in the '60s, with issues such as race, religion, gender and divorce, with an unparalleled intelligence and, yes, grace; when ABC acquired the network, "State of Grace" was one of the first shows jettisoned.)

These days, ABC Family seems to want to be the FX of kids channels, offering edgy entertainment for an audience that may or may not be ready for such. Its latest offering (debuting Monday) is "Kyle FX," about a mysterious teen of indeterminate origins (likely of a sci-fi nature) absorbed by a "normal" American family. In the course of Monday's episode, accounts of or references to teenage sex, underage drinking and masturbating to male magazines are presented. The main character is placed in a juvenile detention center, where he exchanges meaningful glances with an angry young inmate who threatens him, prompting the character to wet his pants (the purple narration inadvertently suggests a heightened meaning to this); later, he nuzzles equally meaningfully with the mother figure who accepts him into her family.

Imagine trying to explain all this to your five- or eight-year-old.

But this is only ABC Family's latest provocation. It also has a show, "Falcon Beach," which seems the teen equivalent of the primetime soap "Falcon Crest." Here's part of the show's description: "They live in different worlds, but come summer they share a strip of beach where anything can happen. People fall in love, fall out of love, get into trouble and take risks they never thought they would. For a group of friends and the outsiders they meet, this summer is about holding onto the sun and fun as long as they can… There are no right answers, just the endless possibilities of summer. What does that mean for the dreamers and the schemers, the lovers and doubters?" More importantly, what does that mean for parents who were hoping to plop their kids in front of something along the lines of "Spongebob Squarepants?"

Before this came "Wildfire," which featured a teen girl released from juvenile detention to a horse stable (every 'tween's dream) where she's caught between the "good" boy and the "bad" boy (probably also every 'tween's dream, though one parents are less likely to encourage).

And before all this came a series of ABC Family movies, such as "Snow," "Pizza My Heart" and "Love Rules!" These featured romantic living arrangements that parents would be hard-pressed to justify to their kids at such an impressionable age. And then there was "Pop Rocks," about a nebbishy dad who concealed his too-cool-for-school background as a rock star which featured not entirely wholesome references to drugs and groupies.

Let me make this clear: I am adamantly opposed to material that will dumb-down the culture, which is what the FCC seems hell-bent to impose upon the broadcast networks. Intelligible discourse between adults seems most under fire right now, as the FCC fine against the CBS series "Without a Trace" appears to indicate. This serves no one, not adults; not children. It's a disturbingly kneejerk response to programming aimed squarely at adults, who, the FCC seems to suggest, deserve no right to mainstream communications.

On the other hand, if a cable network -- in its very name -- declares itself aimed at family audiences, then it should serve an audience of all ages, and parents shouldn't have to worry about the content such networks offer, and be able to sit kids of all ages before the TV when that network's content is being presented on their TVs.

The N, another cable channel, offers material that offers 'tween audiences challenging subject matter, in shows such as "Degrassi: The Next Generation" and "Instant Star." But The N clearly differentiates its programming from its kid-friendly channel, Noggin, and its series tackle such material in a far more thoughtful, nuanced fashion.

Again, let me state: My favorite shows are those aimed squarely at adults, such as FX's "Rescue Me" and HBO's "Deadwood." But there's no hint that these shows invite a youthful viewership; they want me and alike-minded adults to enjoy them. ABC Family targets boobs who don't know (and perhaps don't care) what their kids watch. But since the government can't regulate who can and cannot become a parent, it likewise has no business enforcing its morals upon TV viewers.