TV Press Tour: An Appreciation

TV Press Tour begins tomorrow. I hate TV Press Tour. Were I ever to commit suicide, I would do it just before TV Press Tour just to spare myself, at least, that amount of misery.

Now, I may be in the minority here. Most of those who cover Press Tour come from elsewhere in the country and are put up in a swanky hotel (Pasadena’s Ritz-Carlton) for two or three weeks, so at least they have some luxurious creature comforts surrounding them while they ponder this excrescence to the body of journalism.

During Press Tour, broadcast and cable networks trot out the stars and creators of their new and upcoming series for an exhausting, never-ending series of press conferences and “events� that run from 9 in the morning or earlier to about 10 p.m., or around 6 p.m. if one wants to blow off the evening “events.�

So you’re thinking, oh boo-hoo – regular work-day hours and hanging out with celebrities and parties every night, poor you. Well, sure, if you don’t care about journalistic integrity, and certainly, the networks don’t want you to. At the press conferences, those questioned will routinely lie or simply refuse to answer a question. (Usually, they decline to respond with the explanation, “I’m here to talk about the show,� which is insulting to those covering the session in so many ways I won’t even go into it here. Unless, of course, the panel concerns “The Sopranos,� then they won’t say anything about the show at all.)

One example: Last January, at UPN’s executive session, Dawn Ostroff played a spectacular game of “Evade the Press.� Every single reply to a query felt false or obfuscating. Two days after Press Tour ended, we found out why: UPN was being absorbed, with The WB, into a new network, The CW. Why couldn’t the announcement have been made at Press Tour? Because then, actual news would have emanated from Press Tour, and God knows the networks don’t want that.

(The press release announcing the CW press conference was dispatched three hours – 5 a.m. Pacific time – before the press conference itself – 8 a.m. Pacific time. Which meant that not a lot of reporters managed to attend the press conference, and those that did may not have been in a position to ask the right questions. Had the announcement been made during Press Tour, there would have been a raft of pointed, intelligent questions. That’s why the announcement wasn’t made during Press Tour, and that’s why Ostroff was left to flounder during her session – she knew, but couldn’t say anything, and didn’t want to outright lie, but couldn’t exactly tell anything resembling the truth, either.)

Also, though there are a number of intelligent, professional critics and journalists who attend, there are many others in attendance, as well, and some of the questions that come from the assembled journalists are so foolish and inane as to make one embarrassed to be part of the same profession as the person posing the query. (Think about it – if you have a really good question, as a journalist, would you want to let all the other lumpenproles benefit from your brilliance or ask the question at the post-session scrum and maybe get a scoop for yourself? So not too many thoughtful questions are going to get asked by definition.) Which only contributes to the networks’ general perception that those who attend Press Tour are boobs, and certainly informs the condescension and, even, contempt they shower us with.

One year, two network executives actually high-fived one another when a critic complained that they hadn’t said anything of substance. Another year – when crappy reality programming was at its zenith (and just about to take a huge nosedive) – a network executive scolded the assemblage, saying newspaper stories about the glut of reality programming were to blame for the public thinking there was too much reality TV, not the actual surfeit itself.

So where Press Tour, to the uninitiated, might seem like glamorous fun, for me, it’s three weeks of sleeplessness and craven self-promotion and buffoonery and being condescended to. Any takers now?

Another reason to hate Press Tour: I’ll be so overwhelmed with the networks’ shenanigans that I won’t be able to contribute to this blog. The Daily News is in the process of setting up a page devoted to Press Tour coverage (much of it available only online), so you can experience my hell vicariously there.