Who's the father of this baby?

While I'm afraid Rosie O'Donnell will come to the Daily News, find my desk and proceed to slap the living life out of me, I'm just the messenger here on one of the theories about who fathered Katie Holmes' baby and how she and Tom Cruise made it appear to be the "Mission: Impossible" star's doing.

This sure ain't confirmed and may not even be plausible.

Back to Suri -- she's plenty cute, all right. She doesn't have Tom's nose, that's for sure.