The 2009 (New York is the greatest city in the) World Series wasn't exactly one for the ages.
         The Yankees won their 27th Fall Classic title. Ho-hum. The Bronx Bombers clinched it in the sixth game against the (double ho-hum) defending World Champions Philadelphia Phillies.
         The Phillies looked like they couldn't wait until the Series was over. And that was while they were playing Game 3.
         Phillies skipper Charlie Manuel managed the team like he was back with the hapless Cleveland Indians.
         Phillies slugger Chase Utley tied Reggie Jackson's home run total for a World Series at 5. But it was all for not.
         The Yankee bench was deeper. Heck, they could've even made room for A-Rod's actress squeeze Kate Hudson to get a turn at bat. Rumor has it she can hit lefties better than the Phillies' slugger Ryan Howard. Who played more like Moe Howard during the Series.
    The Series went according to plan, with Yankee Skipper Joe Girardi even overcoming the ex-Cub factor ---- which in baseball lore decrees that the team in the Fall Classic that field the most ex-Cubs on the the field  is bound to lose. Girardi, who won World Series rings as a Yankee catcher, actually went to the Cubs to don the tools of ignorance in the earlier part of the decade.
         No jinx this time. See, the Yankees are too big to fail. Unlike banks in America. The Bronx Bombers are almost mythological in a country that knows how to worship its myths and legends.
         And it's a sure sign that the Yankees' winning the World Series means good times are ahead.
         Or so Yankee devotees (including some sports reporters and historians) will swear by.
         The franchise is so powerful an icon it seems to bring a feeling of confidence that's contagious throughout the nation.
         So that means optimism is stepping to the plate to knock one out of the park. And everyone will start finding work and the economy will turn around. 
         Because the Yankees are back on top, baby! As George Costanza might bellow.
         Pinstripes can replace the stripes on the flag. The stars can become dollar signs.
         Love 'em or hate 'em, when they deliver, the Yankees do it up big. Large in a Big Country.
         Brash and arrogant, the Yankees are a metaphor for America: They're the best money can buy and they expect to win. The team with the most World Series titles, as the Yankees go, so go the nation.
         Anyway, the best season for sports ---- when baseball, basketball, football and hockey were available for the sports fanatic to view on any given night ---- ended Wednesday night when the Phillies left disappointed at the new Yankee ballpark.
         The House that Free Agency Built.
         The Series had a few memorable moments: certainly Utley's home runs, and Johnny Damon's steal of second and then catching the Phillies infield asleep and almost matter-of-factly taking third in the same breath.
         Damon, who won a World Series ring with the Boston Red Sox in 2004 before he joined the enemy, was certainly a candidate for World Series MVP, which would've driven a collective stake through the hearts of the Fenway faithful.
         Maybe it was appropriate that the MVP award went to designated hitter Hideki Matsui, who was a baseball superstar in his native Japan before making his mark as New York's own Godzilla. The honor indeed puts the word world in World Series.
         During the post-game honors, the usual suspects were hanging around the winners to get a shot at being with the Big Boys. Looming  behind the Steinbrenner family and Girardi and some of the team was New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who had just the day before spent almost as much money getting re-elected as the franchise spent fielding a World Series winner.
   Too bad Phillies shortstop Jimmy Rollins made the second to the last out. It would've been poetic justice if he made the last out, because prior to the Series getting under way, he was bragadocious and said the Phillies would beat the Yankees in 5 games.
         Like the Al Pacino character says to the Kevin Spacey character in David Mamet's "Glengarry Glenn Ross":  "You never open your mouth until you know."
         Rollins' comment was the proverbial bulletin board item to post in the Yankees' locker room for inspiration.
         You know, right next to the photo of Kate Hudson.

   Jabba the Butt Limbaugh criticized President Obama's middle-of-the-night trip last week to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware, where he observed the return of 18 flag-covered coffins carrying the remains of Americans killed in Afghanistan.
        "It was a photo op," Jabba belched during an interview with Chris Wallace on Fox Noose.
        The slug who from Day One of the Obama administration said he hoped "this president fails" called Obama a "man-child president" who basically was in the Senate for a cup of coffee and then moved on swiftly up the ladder of political success.
        The Butt  called the president "narcissistic" and that everything has to revolve around him.
        Duh. He's the leader of the free world. Unlike The Butt, who is merely the defacto leader of the Republican Party and who is narcissistic and has to be the center of attention.
        Jabba even chortled that the president is hell bent on destroying the private sector on purpose, which translates into "a denial of liberty, an attack on freedom."
        There's no doubt Jabba does better ---- has a better forum ---- when his enemies (anybody who is a Democrat, a liberal, and especially a minority) are in power.
        But the hatred he can't disguise that he has for Obama is starting to wear thin. But thin isn't in The Butt's lexicon.
        For a guy who makes way too much money for what he does, he's way too angry.
        Not doing so well with the ladies, fat man? Even with a $400 million contract you couldn't get lucky with the ladies.
        Anyway, it will keep you in the Viagra.
        To even utter nonsense like the president went to Dover to "create the impression that he has all of this great concern" is ridiculous. George W. Bush, for all of his bad decisions like getting  us into a war that wasn't necessary, should never be accused of not caring for those who sacrificed their lives for our country.
        No president should.
         Last week when Obama went to Dover to pay his respects, there wasn't a Republican elected to office who would ridicule the president's decision. And the GOP has not been shy in their criticism of this president for practically everything he does.
        But that didn't stop Jabba from regurgitating his comments. After all, he is in a crass by himself.
        And to see the Butt interviewed on Fox Noose is a lot like seeing a eunuch in a harem fanning the fat morphodite.
        Wallace was worshipping at the feet of the Butt (who wasn't wearing socks. Which is OK,  since when he puts his he foot in his mouth he won't be tastin
        The questions weren't softball ---- they were wiffle ball.
        Here's a part of the interview that ended up being cut for time purposes:
        Wallace: You say you're probably worth more than President So-and-So.
        Jabba: Kind of like when The Beatles said they were bigger than Jesus, if you believe Nancy Pelosi.
        Wallace: Does anybody believe Nancy Pelosi anymore?
        Jabba: Not if they're Americans who don't want to see this country taken over by feminazis with mental castration as a top priority.
        Wallace: You called President What's-his-Name immature.
        Jabba: I heard he still plays with dolls.
        Wallace: You say he's inexperienced.
        Jabba: He's got Niagara Falls behind his ears. Unlike George W. Bush, who didn't have much between his ears.
        Wallace: But who is a great American nevertheless.
        Jabba: If I say so.
        Wallace: So you think this president is a wuss?
        Jabba: He's not strong. He wouldn't know how to take any action. Unless it was affirmative.
        Wallace: I'll rattle off names of who is a stud or dud as great Americans. Ready? Sarah Palin
         Jabba: She can move mountains, i'm drooling just thinking about her and that wink.
        Wallace: Think she'll be the first woman elected president?
        Jabba: If I say so.
        Wallace: Ronald Reagan.
        Jabba: Great president, bad movie cowboy. See I can poke fun at Republcans.
        Wallace: Was Teddy Kennedy a great American?
        Jabba: I put off answering that for years on end. I always made the excuse, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.
        Wallace: Glenn Beck.
         Jabba: My own mini-me. He could be me if he had my lofty position on the world stage, my outrageous contact and my humility.
        Wallace: If Jesus came back to earth right now, what would he say to you.
        Jabba: Can I borrow a few grand? No, seriously, he'd say keep spreading  the word that America is heaven on earth. It's the country with the best God, the best family values, and the best chicken wings.
        Wallace: Would Jesus be accepted if he came back to earth?
        Jabba: If I say so. 

      Tuesday is election day and all eyes are on the governor's race in New Jersey. That's because the incumbent Democrat John Corzine is behind in the polls to the Republican candidate. President Obama was campaigning in the Garden State for Corzine, and if he doesn't eek out the victory, it will be a mark on Obama's clout.
      There hasn't been this much interest in New Jersey since the onset of the urban legend of Teamster leader Jimmy Hoffa, who disappeared in 1975, was rumored to have been buried in one of the end zones at Meadowlands where The New York Football Giants play their home games.
       Another key race is in upstate New York where the battle for a congressional seat is being waged by a Democrat and a candidate from the Conservative Party. The GOP candidate dropped out and endorsed the Democrat.
       The conservative Party candidate was endorsed over the Republican by "Death Panels" Palin. Should the candidate win, expect Palin to gloat and take all the credit.
       At face value, that would be a feather in the endangered species cap for Palin. Although the Republican Party may be thinking otherwise.
       Palin certainly is living up to her soon-to-be-released memoir "Going Rogue." She may be in the cat bird's seat with this win and start forming a contending party for 2012.
       A third party ----- regardless of being conservative ----- is needed now more than ever.
       The Republicans are the party of no and the Democrats are the party of way too many alternatives available to choose from.
      Just think if the Conservative Party became so powerful it could do whatever it wants to do and never be questioned? What kind of entertainment would we be subjected to?
      Presenting The Conservative Values Channel (not to be confused with Fox Noose.)
      1. The Census Be Damned: Young conservatives hit the pavement and go door to door to give Americans pamplets containing end-of-the-world scenarios as seen in versions of the Old Testament.
      2. The Sarah Palin network. Endless talking points via Twitter by the former Alaskan governor with fans in Real America. Includes two hours daily of the Avalance of Awesomeness reporting on sports, as well as an hour each time out for selling government stuff on eBay. Hubby Todd has his own segment called "Getting the wife to make money for ya." Audience participation includes trying to put lipstick on a pit bull. 
      3. The Rush Limbaugh National Football League. Black quarterbacks need not apply.
      4. The Abstinence Channel: Series for teens who vow not to have sexual intercourse until they're married. Alternatives include making a tapestry of the American flag, listening only to Debby Boone music, commit to memory the insane rants of Ann Coulter, and organize witch hunts to out teens who scoff at abstinence.
      5. Dick Cheney's Hunting With Liberals: The former creepy veepy looks to let bygones be bygones when he takes politicians like Nancy Pelosi and Barney Frank quail hunting.
     

       Ghoul of the week:
       Last week was Halloween, but the ghouls of celebrity keep haunting the TV news media that seemingly can't get enough of non-talented people who for no apparent (or noteworthy) reason can go on TV and say or do anything.
       At the top of the list is Bristol Palin's nitwit father of her child.
       And it's time for Levi Johnston's 15 minutes of fame to run out.
       The celebrity du jour with no discernable talent finally went too far.
       Last week he appeared on a morning news show (is there really anything newsworthy on those gawd-awful morning shows?) and announced that Sarah "Death Panels" Palin often referred to her child with Down syndrome as "my little retard."
       Ok, way too much inside information. If it's true. And even if it is, we didn't need to know about it.
       For the most part, Palin is an idiot who overdid it with the Letterman thing, but in this case she has all the right to fight back (and she did) against Johnston's accusation.
       The only thing Johnston has going for him now is that he's prime cougar bate: He's young, stupid and obedient.

        It's appropriate that Michael Jackson's last performance (in rehearsal) was made into a movie and released close to Halloween.
        There was always something macabre about Jackson ---- and that's not taking into consideration the "Thriller" video.
        The guy always looked like he not only just saw a ghost, but became so pale looking he came off ghastly.
        Then there was Whacko wanting to purchase the Elephant Man's bones. Creepy.
        It came as no surprise that his family took so long to bury the guy. Jackson seemed to live in a masoleum anyway.
        His movie "This is It" is at first glance appropriately title, being his final performance. But if you think this is it as far as making money on Jackson post-mortum, human nature ought to convince you the leeches in the business won't stop till they get enough.

        This is the first year Michael has to spend Halloween in Heaven. Right now, he's discussing just that fact with former President Richard Nixon.

        MJ: I love me some Halloween. Next to Christmas Day, it's my most favorite time of year because it's when all the little children are at their happiest. Do they celebrate Halloween in Heaven, Mr. Richard Nixon?
        Nixon: Hell if I know. I've never been a Halloween guy. I've worn enough real masks in my life.
        MJ: I remember when I was just a little child someone wanted me to wear a mask of you,  Mr. Richard Nixon, but I said, "Oh, no. That's too scary. I want to be Cinderella."
        Nixon: No doubt. I've never been a big fan of little children either. I scared dogs and children. Children smell funny and they can't vote. I'm glad they have their own section in Heaven away from us adults.
        MJ: Not me Mr. Richard Nixon. I thought when I got to Heaven I could spend all of eternity with all kinds of children.
        Nixon: Like hell.
        MJ: Oh, no, Mr. Richard Nixon, Heaven could never seem like Hell to me. If you were happy in your life, then you'll be happy no matter what Heaven is like.
        Nixon: That explains me then.
        MJ: Mr. Richard Nixon, I spent my whole life making people happy. And rich too, but we won't go there. Anyway, maybe if we sang a song together it will make you happy.
        Nixon: Kid, I've been up here for a while and nothing's worked so far. So I don't think singing a song will cut it.
        MJ: Maybe if we did a song and dance.
        Nixon: Ah, I don't know... Nixon doesn't soft shoe.
        MJ: Liza taught me that even the most curmudgeonry of men feel happy and gay when they dance.
        Nixon: Ya, then she married those guys.
        MJ: You know what I think? I think the world never knew the real Mr. Richard Nixon.
        Nixon: Oh yes they did.
        MJ: Fiddley-dee! For my first Halloween in Heaven, I'm going to dress up Mr. Richard Nixon and introduce him to the afterlife as a song and dance man.
        Nixon: You've watched "Young Frankenstein" one too many times, haven't you? I'm not singing "Putting on the Ritz."
        MJ: You'll be the talk of Paradise! A brand new Mr. Richard Nixon!
        Nixon: I don't think even Paradise can stand to hear the phrase "The New Nixon" again.
        MJ: C'mon, Mr. Richard Nixon, I sang a duet with Sir Paul McCartney and finally got him back to the top of the charts.
        Nixon: My grandkids used to listen to that song all the time, and I remember thinking, you'd think that people would've had enough of silly love songs.
        MJ: Trust me, Mr. Richard Nixon. I'm the King of Pop!
        Nixon: Wait until you've been here awhile and see where that gets you. Elvis is still spending the bulk of his time with Hubert Humphrey. Must be punishment for making all those gawd awful movies.
        MJ: I know this is Heaven and all, but it needs cheering up. I thought there'd be harps and angels singing and Halloween candy and children. Lots and lots of children. As far as infinity would allow.
        Nixon: Just because you're in Heaven doesn't mean you can get what you want when you want it. Kind of like dealing with Congress, but on a much higher level. I've been trying to meet my hero T.R. ---- that's Teddy Roosevelt ---- for what seems like an eternity. The closest I got was Groucho Marx in a Rough Riders outfit.
        MJ: I had Halloween all planned at Neverland Ranch. Oodles of peanut butter cups and candy corn and Jesus Juice.
        Nixon: Jesus Juice? Forget it, I don't want to know. Kid, I gotta tell ya, there's probably not going to be any Halloween in Heaven. Too many satanic references. Living dead. Ghosts. Goblins. Not exactly part of the Good Book.
        MJ: But that's not fair, Mr. Richard Nixon. I wanted to perform "Thriller" for the angels and hope that by some divine intervention the little children who are somewhere where I can't get at them would see it too.
        Nixon: I don't know what to tell you kid. I've been here a long time and all it's been is one-on-one conversation with people I wouldn't have been aligned with in life. But at least the climate's nice.
        MJ: You mean......
        Nixon: Uh-huh, this is it.......
      
       

          The Goddess of Gab and the Pageant Princess of Politics will meet for the first time next month when Oprah interviews Sarah "Death Panels" Palin.
          It's the most anticipated meeting of two powerful personalities since Frost-Nixon. Or when Baba WaWa interviewed Kate Hepburn and asked her what kind of tree she'd like to be.
          The only way to top it is if Oprah can somehow manage to get Jon and Kate, the Octomom and Balloon Boy on the same show.
          Another coup for the most famous woman in America whose first name is dyslexic for Harpo. Or is it the other way around?
          The estrogen ego engagement is open to an array of possibilities. The Ying and Yang of Yakking could take on such subject matter as:
          1. The two of them downing shots of Southern Comfort and then see who could pass a sobriety test by doing some fancy pageant walkin'.
          2. Talk about what a dweeb Letterman is.
          3. Come to blows after arguing which one did more to get Obama elected president.
          4. Agree on a future Oprah show about how women can make tons of money by actually quitting a job people elected them to do.
          5. Palin could jump up and down on Oprah's couch while professing her true love for herself.

          Then it would be time for the interview. Who knows, part of it might go something like this:

          Oprah: Hey, girl, glad to finally meet you.
          Palin: I bet it is.
          Oprah: There's so much to talk about. But let me start by asking, where is Sarah Palin right now?
          Palin: I'm a non-stop newsmaking money machine.
          Oprah: Your book "Going Rogue" certainly proves that. You know it's going to be in Oprah's Book Club.
          Palin: What an honor for the both of us. When does the club meet? And we don't have to discuss any other books we might have to read, do we?
          Oprah: No. You just get your publisher to put the sticker on the book so more women will be suckered into buying it and believing everything in it because I told them to.
          Palin: Sounds easy enough. I can deal with that.
          Oprah: Speaking of dealing ----- you've had to deal with a lot of things since you were thrust onto the national stage.
          Palin: It's all a part of being a woman in what men still think is a man's world.
          Oprah: So you're saying it's not a man's world after all?
          Palin: We just let them do all the heavy lifting so they can die before us. Then we take off from that and run our lives the way we want to.
          Oprah: You're on to something there, sister girlfriend. Men don't even have an equivalent to me. Not that there could ever be an equivalent to me ----- hey, write that down as a possible theme for a show. But let's talk about your marriage. It's strong. How do you make it work?
          Palin: Todd is in good shape for a man his age ---- but he knows he can't outrun me when I'm in a helicopter with my AK-47.
          Oprah: Ever thought about straying?
          Palin: Hokey-smokes, no! That's like asking me if I ever thought of becoming a Democrat. Besides, you know what they say: why go out for a veggie sandwich when you've got moose at home.
          Oprah: You're a star on the political stage, and men find you hot. I've even referred to you as a MILF. How do you deal with that?
          Palin: I always thought MILF meant McCain Is Like a Father. Then Bristol told me what it meant. I think it's the TV culture that makes everybody think about s-e-x. Hey, I know I'm hot. But what can I do. I'm not going to be like Hillary Clinton and wear pantsuits and look like someone's worst nightmare blind date. I'm getting better with age. That comes from good, Christian living.
          Oprah: So you're OK with men fantasizing about you?
          Palin: Can't do anything about it. But if they try to act on it, it's a karate chop right in the junk.
          Oprah: Works everytime. Now about you and your politics. You've made it clear that your kids are off limits.
          Palin. Ya. Unless I need to use them to advance my political agenda.
          Oprah: Which you've done.
          Palin: You bet'cha. Ask that perv Letterman.
          Oprah: Will you ever go on his show?
          Palin: When H-e-double hockey sticks freezes over.
          Oprah: You've said some pretty nasty things about President Obama when he was candidate Obama. Do you regret any of them?
          Palin: I stand by everything I was told to say about him.
          Oprah: Do you really believe his health care plan would include death panels ---- pulling the plug on granny?
          Palin: I think we don't want to take a chance on it and find out if it's true or not.
          Oprah: OK, enough of the serious stuff. Before we go to break, let's play the game "This one, or that one."
          Palin: I'm as ready as a bald eagle dodging buckshot.
          Oprah: OK, first up: ESPN sportscaster or senator from Alaska?
          Palin: No contest. Get it. That's a sports pun. Give me hockey highlights over cap and trade anyday.
          Oprah: Beyonce or Sheryl Crow?
          Palin: All I want to do is have some fun...
          Oprah: Clooney or Pitt?
          Palin: Pitt. Only because he's a dad with a lot of kids and doesn't care if he has more. Clooney is too Hollyweird liberal. And he has creepy eyebrows. When he gets older he's going to look like Andy Rooney.
          Oprah: Thongs or granny panties?
          Palin: That sounds more like one of the 10 at 10 questions Jay Leno would ask Justin Timberlake.
          Oprah: Should we take that as a no comment?
          Palin: I'm from Alaska, so longjohns ---- in fact, I have a pair with the MSNBC logo on the trap door.
          Oprah: OK, now for the big question: are you planning to run for president in 2012?
          Palin: Too soon to say. I'm still testing the waters to see if I can walk on them. And we'll see how this book thing goes.
          Oprah: And how Mr. Obama does as president. Good or bad, you can't deny he's already made history.
          Palin: You bet'cha. But history can change in the wink of an eye.....
         
         

          George W. Bush, motivational speaker.
        That's like saying Rush Limbaugh, a study in humility.
        But there was W. on Monday in Fort Worth, Texas, speaking at a business seminar called "Get motivated."
        Take it from W. when it comes to running a business. He was once owner of the Texas Rangers baseball team and made millions for himself in land grabs, shady dealings and allegations of insider trading. Plus he traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
        And we all know how he ran the country, into the ground. The man knows the economy like a fish knows riding a Harley.
        Be that as it may, W. is back in the spotlight. Which is always good news for late-night comics. His best attribute was and will always be he's the ultimate punchline.
        So in that sense, the former president motivates others to make money. If only to further the careers of those in stand-up and as impersonators.
        The press was not allowed to cover any part of the motivational speaking event, which also featured Hall of Fame Steelers Quarterback Terry Bradshaw, former Secretary of State Colin Powell, and Rudy 9-11.
        One can almost imaging what some people were thinking during and after W. conducted his business at the seminar:
        1. "Isn't this the same guy who couldn't get motivated when he was the leader of the free world?"
        2. "When we gonna see Balloon Boy?"
        3. "I liked when he said, 'I'm the motivater who motivates with the motive to be motivational.' "
        4. "If those Northwest Airline pilots were listening to this on tape I couldn't blame them for dozing off."
        5. "Until now, I didn't think anyone could be more of a goober than Terry Bradshaw."
        6. "It was scarier than 'Paranormal Activity.' "
        7. "The only thing I was motivated to do was to say 'nuke-u-lure.' "
        8. "He was doing great until someone gave him the book "My Pet Goat" to read and then he got that deer-caught-in-the-headlights look on his face."
        9. "I thought this was going to be a good place to pick up chicks ------ obviously I took a wrong turn looking for the Bill Clinton motivational seminar."
        10. "I was impressed. I think the former president has finally put to rest that he's smarter than a fifth-grader."

          Jabba got punk'd

         Heads must be rolling in the research department at Jabba the Butt Limbaugh headquarters.
         Shocking. Not that heads would be rolling. But that Jabba actually takes time to research something before he sticks one of his fat hooves in his big fat mouth.
         Why check facts when you make up your own? Jabba don't need to check no steenkin' facts.
         Case in point:  Last week the blowhard bellowed what he thought was something factual about President Obama hating the United States and the Constitution.
         That'll teach you to think, Jabba.
         Well, the smoking gun the fat bozo believed he had in his grasp turned out to be a hoax.
         Obama's faux thesis at Columbia University dissing the founding fathers and the Constitution was a prank, put online in August as a satire.
         The joke's on you, Jabba.
         Before he realized he got punk'd, Jabba tore the president a new one, ripping him for hating on America.
         The concocted thesis had Obama saying the Constitution is flawed, as well as mumbo-jumbo about the redistribution of wealth.
         Jabba picked it apart like it was a whole Thanksgiving turkey all to himself. The Giant Mouth Sore swallowed it.
         What a tool.
         So what did this Paragon of Paranoia, this Behemoth of Bullcrap do once he was faced with the fact he'd been punk'd?
         What he always does ------ can't admit that he was wrong. Or apologize for leading his listeners astray ( no need ---- that's what he's paid to do anyway.)
         So how does he cover up the egg on his face? By feeding his Butt-pluggers rotten omlettes.
         There's truth in satire, Jabba belched on air. "That's how Obama would think."
         Wrong, oxycontin breath. But thanks for playing the game anyway. Big Pharma, tell the pillhead what he's won.....
         Jabba, next time you believe you have a smoking gun, it might help with whatever credibility you have with actual thinking people that you don't shoot yourself in the foot with it.
         It's already the embodiment of an American tragedy that you're getting paid way too much money to keep shooting your mouth off.
        

       The Pittsburgh Steelers must have Brett Favre thiking about retiring again.
       The (now with) Minnesota Vikings quarterback had a rough go of it in the City of Champions on Sunday.
       The Vikings and Favre were unbeaten this season going into the game. They soon realized they weren't in Cleveland, San Francisco, Detroit, or even Green Bay anymore.
       "Yunz" in Pittsburgh.
       Blitzburgh's vaunted D, commanded by field marshal Dick LeBeau, tacked 14 points on the scoreboard in the fourth quarter off of two Favre turnovers.
       Seeing linebacker LaMarr Woodley, who hasn't missed too many meals, scoop a Favre forced fumble and rumble 77-yards for a touchdown was a hoot.
       Woodley even boasted that it was all the better because he "juked a guy" as his teammates formed an armada on his way to his moment in the October sun.
       If that wasn't impressive enough, the Steelers' D delivered an encore in the form of a knockout punch.
       Linebacker Keyaron Fox intercepted a Favre pass that bounced off Vikings receiver Chester Taylor and returned it 82-yards to seal the victory.
       The Steelers' best offense was its defense on Sunday.
       LeBeau's Pummels pretty much kept All-Pro running back Adrian Peterson in check. You can hide, but you can't run on the Steelers.
       To Peterson's credit, he did steamroll the Steelers' William Gay (not an easy task.)
       Obviously, Peterson is playing for the wrong team. That kind of punishing hit is associated with a player wearing black and gold.
       After the game, Gay even said of Peterson: "He's not human .... Dude's made of steel."
       No chinks in the Steel Curtain this Sunday.
       "Shades of Ham, Blount,
       Lambert and Greene.
       Just another season this Steelers D
       may be the best you've ever seen."
       That doesn't mean the Steelers' offense was out to lunch. They took a big chunk of the fourth quarter off, that's true, but QB Ben Roethlisberger hooked up with his talented rookie receiver for a key touchdown just before the half.
       The rook's name is Mike Wallace ----- an appropriate name for a player on a Steelers' roster that gives fans an edge-of-your-seat 60 minutes every time out.

      
      
       Start spreading the news......

        In case you haven't heard, the New York Yankees are going to the World Series for the 40th time.
        Sportscasters from ESPN to Fox Sports knew it all along and were just waiting for the formalities to round the bases.
        And they just can't disguise their adoration for the Bronx Bombers.
        The best team that money can buy is living up to its hype and will more than likely beat the defending World Series Champions Philadelphia Phillies in six games.
        But guys, lighten up on the worshipping at the cleats of Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez.
        And Fox Sports, can you please give the viewers a thousand more cut-away shots of actress Kate Hudson everytime A-Rod gets on base?
        What does Hudson bring to the dish besides being a hot dish? She's the babe A-Rod is shagging.
        Maybe during the Series, Fox Sports can show cut-away shots of the babes other Yankees are doing.
        Check out the hot tamale Jorge Pasada is doing the nasty with!
        And give it up for Nick Swisher's Playboy bunny gal-pal. He's no swisher, ladies!
        Where's the outrage, feministas? Hudson is being paraded on national TV as a sex object. Boy-toy of A-Rod.
        Hey, sports buffs, here's an idea on how to combine the two lovebirds and tie in the sports-Hollywood connection. He plays sports and she's in the movies, so America meet "A-Rod and reel."
        As for the announcing, is there anyone more annoying than Fox Sports baseball broadcaster Tim McCarver?
        The master of the obvious is so bland he makes vanilla look flamboyant.
        McCarver actually said this about the Yankees' unhittable closer Mariano Rivera: "How appropriate for Mariano Rivera to begin every pitch with a bow."
        Huh? What's that mean? Don't know, McCarver didn't elaborate.  He spews more nonsense out of his mouth than the players spit.
        But the ratings whores at Fox Sports are in seventh heaven now that they've got the Yankees on their network.
        It's an East Coast Fall Classic guaranteed to beat even "Dancing with the Stars" in the Nielsen's.
        The East Coast bias the media (including sports) is accused of has its World Series.
        Teams from the West Coast are toast ------ although the TV ratings whores probably would've preferred the Los Angeles Dodgers against the Yankees for the "manager Joe Torre returns to New York" rivalry.
        California teams are hated back East. It's the overbearing liberal La La movie star thing. East Coast sports teams (like the Steelers, baby!) have fan bases out here because of all the transplants.
        Consider this: L.A., for all its glitz and glamour, is actually not nearly as arrogant as New York.
        Is there a more arrogant team in all of sports than the Yankees? Ever deal with a native New Yorker now living in California?
        As for Philadelphia, no one cared that they won the whole enchalada last year and won't care this year one way or the other.
        Go ahead, hold the World Series this year in the rain and chance of snow. Whatever team wins can extradite their criminals to the losing city.
        Anyway, it's football season.
        The Pittsburgh Steelers have just taken another step up the "Stairway to Seven."
        How many Super Bowl wins do the New York teams (combined) have again....?
       

    Ahh, human interest stories.
    When TV news shows it's true colors: uninformed and completely lost without a script.
    Talking about the kid in the hot air balloon who ended up not being in the hot air balloon on Thursday in Colorado.
    We in the newsroom ---- like everyone else in the nation who tuned in ---- were glued to the TV and followed with every passing minute as the balloon (that looked a lot like either a space ship or a hot-water bottle) floated through the air with the greatest of ease.
    But few of us in the newsroom were at ease.
    We hoped the kid wasn't really in the balloon.
    And if he was in the balloon, we hoped the oxygen would hold out.
    Or that he wouldn't fall out of the balloon's basket.
    Before the sigh-of-relief outcome was known, the TV robots made guesses and tried to keep their viewing audience connected.
    And they stated the obvious. Did they ever. Just because the TV bimbos and himbos aren't on camera, they think they have to give us the play-by-play of the balloon floating in the air.
    You wanted to yell at the tube ---- we're not in the car listening to you on the radio.
    One TV puppet at one time flat out said, "We don't know anything."
    That is one set up line waiting for a slew of responses.
    CNN's Wolf Blitzer was near the tipping point of already trying to assess blame. Somebody's got to be guilty.
    You almost expected him to say something like "Where's Superman when you need him?"
    Maybe he was hoping Capt. Sullenberger of the Hudson River passenger jet landing could be summoned in time.
    Talk about your classic "Cry Wolf" story.
    In a TV era of car chases that get instant covereage no matter where it is in the country, one almost wondered if Wolf was asking for police helicopters to chase after the hot-air balloon.
    Watching TV covereage re-inforced one thing: the balloon wasn't the only thing full of hot air.
    But it all turned out for the best.
    Little six-year-old Falcon Heene was hiding in the garage after his father scolded him for playing inside the balloon's compartment.
    His older brother said he saw Falcon (could there have been a more appropriate name in this story?) climb into the the balloon before it took off.
    If anything, the story brought those caught up in it down to earth for a little while.
    The newsroom, known for being tough-skinned and skeptical, was uncommonly quiet when it was first believed that something tragic happened to the boy when, after the balloon fell to earth, he wasn't found inside.
    But after it was all cleared up and everything was OK ---- everything was back to normal. If you want to call working in a newsroom normal.
    Wait until the late night comics get ahold of material on this story.
    Letterman has to have a Top Ten List at the ready.
    The kid's not going to be in too much trouble ---- may be sent to his room without being able to watch "Sponge Bob Square Pants."
    Just in case though, President Obama is going to invite the kid and his dad to the White House for some beers.
    Better make that root beers.