Desperate times calls for desperate decisions. It’s time the Republican party dropped a candidate from its ticket. And it’s not Sarah Palin.
At a McPalin rally Wednesday in Pennsylvania, it was reported that after Palin spoke and turned it over to McCain, people in the crowd started to wander off — kind of like McCain himself. Maybe more like so-called fans during the 7th inning of a Dodger game.
McCain has become an albatross around the neck of the GOP. At that rally, he stooped so low he let his wife sling some mud. Even though she came off more like PMS Barbie, she gave it the ol’ Fox News try. She got her dander up and said Obama “sent a cold chill through my spine” which she propbably hasn’t experienced since McMyFriends told her he bought Viagra. She also snapped at Obama for voting against veterans’ benefits — completely oblivious (hard to believe just by looking at her, ain’t it?) to the fact that her hubby did too. In fact, McHero has missed 6 out of the last 9 votes in the Senate pertaining to veterans. Then she cherped to the crowd that Obama should “change shoes with me for a day.” No, that would be a challenge Rudy 9-11 would welcome. The former America’s Mayor has appeared in drag several times in public forums. All done, of course, before his grandstanding moment in history that he eventually drove into the ground. Rudy, the drag thing once is ugly enough; twice it’s just plain creepy; and the third time it’s … oh, forget it.
McCain had some kind of ’60s flashback at that rally yesterday when he meant to say “my fellow citizens” but blurted out “my fellow prisoners.” Upon hearing that, Palin’s eyes rolled in her pretty little head and she looked to her side as if she wanted to join those people who exited stage right when McBlunder began speaking.
The McCain campaign this week has gone where only Fox News has gone before — in the gutter, or McPalin’s Final Frontier. They’re trying to link Obama’s associationto a ’60s radical like it should be a national obsession. This story was first spewed and drilled into the little minds of Fox News devotees by Sean Hannity — whose own obsession with the former radical borders on man-crush. Add to the fact that Palin will only do interviews on Fox Swoons should convince you she is a candidate of contempt and ignorance. Fox is fascism that doesn’t even try to hide it. The network is about as “fair and balanced” as forcing a blind person to walk a tightrope. PROMO ALERT! The faux pas news organization can call the Palin interviews “The fox on Fox.”
The McPalin campaign will do anything to get voters’ minds off the issue of our time. They’re even complaining about the latest Newsweek cover with an extreme close-up of Palin that wasn’t airbrushed. What a political party of whiners. What, are they trying to win the women vote by way of female vanity?
The real question is why is McCain hiding behind womens’ skirts? He can only draw big crowds at rallies if he has Miss Perkiness at his side. By the way, she’s gonna drop the first puck at a Philadelphia Flyers game this weekend. Hokey-smokes! It’s the Ultimate Hockey Mom Competition! McCain, meanwhile, is scheduled to referee a shuffleboard competition hosted by the surviving cast members of “The Beverly Hillbillies.”
Since Palin will be in Philly this weekend, there’s talk of her popping up on the opening of this week’s “Saturday Night Live” where she can face-off wth her body double Tina Fey. If she does, she’ll ace it. Talk about your game-changer. It’ll send Palinfurther into the stratosphere. All the more reason to drop McCain from the ticket. No real excuse necessary — he can tell the public he wanted to spend more time with his houses.
Palin is flying so high she won’t need to have a running mate. Besides, she’s a Republican.God is her co-pilot.
Heaven help us.