Packaging Palin

President-elect Obama met with the nation's governors in Philly today. Gov. Ahh-nold was there bragging about his big stimulus package to anyone who'd listen. But of course even The Terminator was overshadowed by Diva Destruction herself, Gov. Camera Friendly. Sarah Palin brought to the table exactly what the economic summit needed -- glamor and incoherence, when it came to her 'splaining what she got from Obama's discussion with state leaders.

The hot gov. certainly took reporters and photogs' minds off boring stuff like the national recession -- which took a backseat to what she was really driving at: focusing all the attention on herself. It worked again. The news media followed her around like stalkers sifting through the garbage at a Hollywood celebrity's house. What went unnoticed was the question asked of Palin concerning what to do about the size of a stimulus package -- to which she replied, "I don't know. Viagra, maybe."

OK that was a flaccid attempt at a joke. Something Palin never is. But her stock keeps continuing to rise. Maybe they ought to put her on Wall Street -- anybody who thinks they can keep it up as long as she is for the next four years has got some stones.



Tossing the "Hardball" into the ring



Chris Matthews, the motor-mouth host of MSNBC's "Hardball," is considering a run for the Senate in Pennsylvania to unseat incumbent Sen. Arlen Specter. Matthews is always within the sound of his own voice, especially when he's interviewing someone. He'll ask a question, then give his opinion about the issue while the person is trying to answer the question, therefore leaving the poor soul unable to finish their thought.

This guy is a human philabuster. If he does throw his mouth into the ring he'll have to quit his show. If so, let's hope MSNBC at least gives the guy a chance to interview himself.

Now you tell us

The government gets one loud collective "Duh!" from the American people after confirming Monday that the nation has been in a recession since December of 2007. Gee, what else is the government trying to keep from us for fear they have to let us down easy. Could it be:

A. Elvis is alive and working at a Safeway in Fresno.

B. We never really landed on the moon in 1969 -- it was a movie made by the CIA, which commissioned two upstarts from film school named Lucas and Spielberg.

c. There is no Santa Claus