Those who can't do, teach

The more you can get away with in life, the more you can do whatever you damn well please.

That starts in high school. They say what you do or don't do during your high school years is reflective of how your life will turn out. If that's the case, the future looks bright for the youth of America that they have to wear sunglasses -- shades they pinched from a store, a parent, or a relative.

A nationwide survey finds that 30 percent of high school students admitted that they steal, lie, and cheat on tests. Further, they don't even feel any remorse. Hey, at least they don't smoke.

Equally telling in the Associated Press report was how educators reacted to the survey. Some agreed that "intensified pressures are prompting many students to cut corners." Poor little Kyle and Madison, how can we help? How about if we make excuses for you to save our own skin? Give me a break.

"The competition is greater, the pressures on kids have increased dramatically," said a spokesman with the National Association of Secondary School Principals. After which he asked if anybody found his computer yet.

Are these educators doing their homework?

1. Cheating in school is rampant and getting worse.

2. Students use the Internet to plagiarize assignments.

3. 93 percent surveyed said they were "satisfied with their personal ethics and character" and believe strongly that they're better than most people they know when it comes to doing what's right.

Congratulations, you all have a future in politics.

Kids under pressure? SFW. Good for them -- toughens them up for the real world where they're going to have to deal with people who know more than they do when it comes to doing what's right.

Another educator in the survey said people like to blame society's problems on young people without realizing "they aren't making the decisions about what's happening in society." Duh. Scary to think of when they will. Maybe a decision society ought to consider making is learn from this survey and stop being wusses by making excuses. More explanations why Johnny can't cope: Students lead such busy lives outside the classroom. Ya! They're stealing from their parents, copying homework and looking up "Romeo and Juliet" on the Internet and giving it a happy ending.

The final failing grade from the educators quoted in the article is one for the books: Students pick up on the fact that society is cynical and they use the "everybody else does it" mantra. That's the oldest excuse on record, isn't it? It's right up there with "the dog ate my homework." If that excuse is working, we're creating a generation of characters out of a Will Ferrell movie.

The fault isn't with kids playing too many video games, watching too much TV or going to too many movies. It's the educational system -- for ignoring the fact that failure isn't an option, they get an A.

So let's not blame the little darlins -- the pace of the world today makes it tough to keep up with book learnin'. And money stolen is twice as sweet as an allowance earned.

Then there's all that sex with the teachers.

If this survey didn't turn some heads, that one would. It might be frightening -- especially if it concludes no child left behind.