Levi and the Mocktomom

It’s getting difficult to keep up with America’s new Joneses, the Pistol-Packin’ Palins. But it never gets old. Like the proverbial gift that keeps on giving.

The power of the Palin knocked the perils of the Octomom off the TV tabloids for a while anyway. And who isn’t thankful for that?

The latest soap opera of course involves Levi Johnston, the kid who knocked up Sarah’s daughter Bristol.

Levi is looking more and more like a candidate for those hot bromance comedies of the moment — but not movies, you know network TV is going to rip off that trend soon enough. Maybe they’ll call the show something safe like “Tundra Tomfoolery.”

But if MTV gets a shot at a show they can call it something like “Levi’s genes.” Or maybe a Hallmark special called “A pistol for Bristol.”

Levi can be bromantically involved with stars like Seth Rogen and Justin Timberlake — they’re certainly not over-exposed or anything like that. And after doing weed and bromance stuff they can expose themselves to each others’ gal pals.

But back to the riff between Levi and the Mocktomom. Palin released her hounds to put out statements like Levi was “engaging in lies.” Levi more or less admitted to Tyra Banks that Mocktomom knew he and Bristol were doing the dirty deed — and, hokey-smokes!, in the Palin digs.

Levi did stumble over the question when Banks asked him if he and Bristol were practicing safe sex. Tyra, he knocked her up. Hello. Levi first said yes and then was practically humiliated into saying “most of the time.” Give the kid a break, he probably thinks safe sex means “Hey, your parents aren’t home it’s safe to have sex.”

Palin is a hypocrite here. She paraded the guy at the Republican National Convention as the nice young man who had sex with my daughter but at least he’s going to marry her and she’s not going to abort the bastard. Levi did freely admit he didn’t want to go to the convention. Can’t blame him, since most of the conventioneers were old enough to call John McCain “Sonny.”

According to Levi, soon after Palin and McCain lost the election, her treatment toward her would be son-in-law went downhill faster than a drunken Todd Palin on a runaway snowmobile. Levi said Palin told him things like he didn’t live there, he stayed there. That’s cold. Say what you want about Sarah Palin, but who would’ve thunk she’d could be Mocktomom Dearest.

In other Sarah Palin news, the Alaskan Avalanche of Awesomeness wants a missile defense shield for her state because North Korea test fired a missile and her soverign state is certainly a target for missiles gone wild.

And when Kim Jong il rears his head with that bad haircut in Alaska’s airspace, all the arsenol donated to her from fans when she campaigned in real America might not be able to handle the really nasty commie stuff.

Missile defense shield. Sounds like Bristol Palin could’ve used something like that about a year or so ago…..

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