A switch in time

Swine flu got you down? Could be worse. You could be a member in good standing of the Republican Party.

Like Pennsylvania Sen. Arlen Spector used to be. He switched parties Tuesday and joined the ranks of the political party flavor of the moment, the Democrats.

The GOP doesn't stand for Grand Ole Party anymore. It's more like Get Out Pronto!

Not that Specter is any gift from the political gods. He's the guy who came up with "the magic bullet theory" when the Warren Report released its report on the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. The report should be regarded as the best work of fiction since Dickens.

Specter's theory is that a shot from Lee Harvey Oswald struck Kennedy, made a dandy of a route down his arm and then left Kennedy and struck then Texas Gov. John Connely's shoulder or something. Even Specter must have been surprised when the Warren panel bought that.

In any event, Specter has been a senator from the Keystone State since 1980. He's running for re-election in 2010 and appeared to have a real challenger in the Republican primary. He's been around long enough to know that since there's been a surge of Republicans in that state switching to the Dems (one report puts it at 200,000 since 2005) he may as well jump ship and get on board the USS Obama.

Besides, the GOP is rather like the Titanic -- as long as they have Cheney and Jabba the Butt at the helm.

The news hit the major cable news networks like an adreneline rush. They were all swine flu all the time until Specter broke the news.

Those left-leaning lemmings at MSNBC found it difficult to wipe those Nancy Pelosi patented frozen smiles off their faces. It was almost like they were waiting for someone to bring in the champagne.

Naturally over at Fox News it was another story. First the Fox News bimbos had to be reminded that Specter's decision wasn't an act of treason. Then they were scurrying to find any dirt they could find to hit Specter with. Then they had to resort to making things up.

Sean Insanity will go bonkers on his show tonight. Jabba the Butt will grumble that Specter was never a real Republican anyway. Wouldn't doubt if Jabba starts referring to him as Arlene.

No one in their right mind would even think to wonder what Fox News' new Minister of Propaganda Glenn "Goebbels" Beck will have to say. Beck actually said the swine flu epidemic was created by the Obama administration to get his Heealth and Human Services nominee confirmed.

Ya, what are a few hundred lives compared to getting the former governor of Kansas as head of HHS. Will somebody check Beck's DNA? He's gotta be related in some way to W.

As mentioned, Specter is no prize. But his vote could be the one needed to get Obama's agenda going.

Meanwhile, the GOP is already talking about running former Pa. governor and first head of homeland security Tom Ridge to run against Spector.

Neither one of them give Pennsylvania a good name. No matter what party they want to hook up with.

Good thing the Steelers are there. If they switched to another state -- let alone another conference -- that would be a crime.