Pals of Palin

Hokey smokes, what’s this? “Death Panels” Palin pallin’ around with Chinese communists in Hong Kong!

The Alaskan Avalance of Awesomeness was paid $300,000 to deliver a speech on, among other things, banking.

Which is equivalent to the Chinese communists giving us a supposed learned speech on the origins of jazz.

While in Commieland, “Death Panels” ripped on President Obama. She knocked the policies of the president of the United States while on foreign soil.

That used to be called treason by the radical right wing-nuts and Fox Noose when a Republican was in the White House. Since it’s Palin doing the criticizing, Fox sees it as the State of the Union address.

No problem with “Death Panels” Palin devulging any state secrets to the commie bastards —- unless teaching the Chinese businessmen fancy pageant walkin’ qualifies.

Palin spoke for more than an hour. Immediately after her speech, the Geneva Convention recognized that anyone who had to listen to the incoherent rants of Palin for that length of time would be subjected to torture.

To paraphrase the Convention’s report: “Even waterboarding looks like a ride at Disneyland when compared to having to be subjected to more than an hour of you bet’chas.”

So what were the commies really thinking when “Death Panels” gave her meandering motivational speech? Well…

1. “If this is the best America has to offer, we just need to be a little more patient. It won’t be much longer…”

2. “When is she going to start supervising the beheading of the turkeys?”

3. “Does anybody want to volunteer telling her that King Kong’s first name wasn’t Hong?”

4. “Us having to listen to her speak is our version of a death panel.”

5. “No more opium for me —- I thought I saw Putin’s head hovering around her air space.”

6. “Is the translator drunk, or is she really spewing this nonsense?”

7. “The only reason I’m going to ask for her autograph is to see if she even knows how to spell.”

8. “I want my money back —– that’s not Tina Fey!”

9. “If this was a movie it would be called “Murder on the Orient Express” because we’d all be killing each other.”

10. “If she was captured in North Korea, the whole country would want to be rescued by Bill Clinton.”

This just in, “Death Panels” Palin’s memoirs entitled “Going Rogue” will be ready in bookstores in November.

That’s several months earlier than expected (a spring 2010 release was originally planned.)

“Death Panels” said she wouldn’t have been able to finish her memoirs this fast if she had stayed on as governor of Alaska.

You know, like not being able to chew gum and walk at the same time…..

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2 Responses to Pals of Palin

  1. MJP says:

    See that the racist and sexist Bruno is back. Thought he crawled back into his roach motel for good.

    Guess not…the bacteria and germs of his opinions–and they are certainly that, not based in any semblance of fact or context–will need more bug spray.

  2. MJP says:

    Oh, yeah. Imagine how many newspapers Bruno would have to be copy editor for in order to make $300,000.

    It doesn’t seem fair. Bruno is such a brilliant mind, such a great writer, but makes peanuts. And Palin, who can’t “chew gum and walk at the same time,” makes big bucks.

    Ha!

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