Tiger beat?

If you can’t beat ‘em, keep ‘em guessing.

Tiger Woods announced Friday that he was taking an “indefinite leave” from golf.

The world’s greatest golfer says he’s going to work on saving his marriage.

You know, the old “I want to spend more time with my family” pat answer that’s supposed to satisfy the media.

Well, if that ever gets boring:

Things Tiger Woods can do while he takes an indefinite leave of absence from golf:

1. Work as the MC on a “Girls Gone Wild” Tour.

2. Star in an updated version of the Elvis Presley movie “Girls, Girls, Girls.”

3. Learn humility.

4. Find bin Laden and win back the public.

5. Drive the media even crazier by hanging out partying with Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan.

6. Join the Tea Party and announce you are considering a run for president in 2012.

7. Hook up with South Carolina Gov. Mark “Love your tan lines” Sanford and really go hiking up the Old Appalacian Trail.

8. Get health care passed.

9. Win a Nobel Peace Prize —- and don’t be disappointed when you discover they used the correct spelling of peace.

10. Listen to your wife’s advice and take up hunting with Dick Cheney.

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