Ba-rock the Casbah

A splendid time was guaranteed for all when Paul McCartney rocked the White House.

The former Beatle serenaded the first lady with his classic ballad “Michelle.” The tribute concert for McCartney featured an A-list of pop music superstars from Faith Hill to Stevie Wonder. It was All Together Now when Sir Paul was joined by the performers and the first family on a rousing finale of “Hey Jude.”

A former Beatle playing the White House for a president could easily be dubbed a Magical History Tour.

Unless you’re Glenn “I see Nazis and communists hiding in my wallpaper” Beck, who would label the event “Back in the U.S.S.R.” Especially after McCartney’s crack about George W. Bush not knowing what a library was. Paul, let it be. After all, W. did marry a librarian — which proves opposites do attract.

But you can almost hear Beck now: “God spoke to me, and you know what he said to me, America? He said BP, British Petrolium, is not responsible for the Gulf oil spill. BP stands for Beatle Paul.”

Speaking of Fox News, the “Hope America Fails” network could’ve offered its own bizarro universe concert for the antichrist in the White House with Ted Nugent, the anti-McCartney, as top billing.

Nugent could re-do a few Beatles classics with new twists on the titles and lyrics:

1. “With a Little Help from My Teleprompter.”

2. “We can Work it Out — if you don’t run against incumbent Democratic senators in primaries.”

3. “Not Fixing a Hole a Mile Under Water in the Gulf”:

“He’s not fixing a hole

where oil’s gushing out

turning the Gulf of Mexico

into a parking lot.

Where it will flow.”

4. Another Beatles song from “Sgt. Pepper” called “Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite” is now called “Being for the Benefit of Rev. Wright” (sung in a duet with Sean Hannity.)

“For the benefit of Rev. Wright

radicals are in our House of White

with Joe Cool.

Godless liberals will all be there

trying to outlaw prayer

in our schools.

The celebrated Chosen One just can’t get ‘er done

such a crime.

It comes as no surprise even though it was advertised

he can’t change water into wine.

Having spent this country into debt

he still doesn’t have a workable plan.

And tonight Rev. Wright will read from the Koran…..”

Not to be left out of the entertainment equation, John McCain hosted Pat and Debby Boone at an anti-immigration barbeque in Phoenix. The Boones sang “You Light Up My Life” and Sarah Palin leaped onto the stage because they were obviously singing about her.

There are some Beatles and post-Beatles song titles that don’t pertain to Palin —- like “Imagine” and “Think for Yourself.” But here are a few that could apply, with different titles and cockeyed lyrics.

Presenting the album, “Sarah Palin’s Loyal Facebook Fans”:

“It was two years ago today

the old coot from Arizona had his way.

He needed to suck up to the right

so he picked someone who wasn’t bright.

Ever since she’s been a smash sensation

has millions of true believers ‘cross the nation.

Sarah Palin’s loyal Facebook fans.

They’re Sarah Palin’s loyal Facebook fans

they can recite everything she tweets.

Sarah Palin’s loyal Facebook fans

backing tea baggers for House and Senate seats.

Sarah Palin’s loyal,

Sarah Palin’s loyal,

Sarah Palin’s loyal Facebook fans….”

Side One:

1. “Happiness is a warm gun —- so don’t tread on the 2nd Amendment, Obama”

2. “(Obama’s the) Taxman.”

3. “Your Mother Should Know —- if you’re serious this time about practicing abstinence.”

4. “Helter Skelter” (duet with Glenn Beck)

Side Two:

1. Duet with Ted Nugent: “Rocky Raccoon —– shot, skinned, and being prepared as an appetizer.”

2. “For No One (but herself)”

3. “Here, There and Everywhere —- for my standard $25,000 per speech.”

4. The final track on the album is reworded from the Beatles’ “She Came in through the Bathroom Window.” This time it’s called “He Peeps in Palin’s Bathroom Window” —- in reference to author Joe McGuinniss, who is writing a book about the diva, moving next door to the Palin Wasilla residence.

Not surprisingly, Palin had to use her kids as presumed victims in order to drum up even more sympathy and support for herself. Naturally, Beckerwood came to her defense saying politicians’ kids should be off limits in any kind of dispute. This after he poked fun on air at Obama’s daughter for apparently asking the prez if he plugged the oil leak yet. And before the Palin run-in with McGinniss, Beckerwood implied Obama’s kids were somehow being recruited by the anti-American Rev. Wright.

The Baked Alaskan more than hinted that McGinniss is a pervert whose window “overlooks Piper’s bedroom.” She also suggested that he would be spying on “my little garden” (we won’t go there) and maybe videotaping “the family swimming hole” (which is a public beach, and not to be confused with what might be the Wasilla Hillbillies’ “cement pond.”)

Palin does have a point. McGinniss moving next door to be so close to the subject matterof his book is a bit too creepy. But for her to continuously use her kids to try to prove to her Palintrons that the vast left wing conspiracy media is out to get her has become tired, pathetic and predictable. Maybe the word paranoid should be changed to Palinoid….

“He peeps in Palin’s bathroom window

protected by 1st Amendment rights.

He wants to see if Sarah flosses

or if Todd really does wear ballet tights.

And so the Palin’s put up a big fence

to keep the creepy peeper in the dark.

They put moose in his driveway

now he doesn’t have anyplace to park.

It’s up to Fox News to tell you

though it’s plain to see.

This perv has an agenda

and it’s financed by MSNBC.

oh ya.”

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