Darlings of Dumbocracy

Margaret Thatcher’s name didn’t ring a bell with Sarah Palin, according to an aide with the John McCain 2008 GOP presidential ticket.

This is significant because Palin claims to be a disciple of Ronald Reagan, the patron saint of the conservative wing of the Republican Party.

Thatcher, of course, was Prime Minister of the United Kingdom from 1979 to 1990, and leader of Great Britain’s, ah, Conservative Party. The only woman to have held both positions.

Reagan called her “the best man in England.” Both came to power around the same time and were determined to reduce the power of government.

Thatcher and Reagan worked together like hand in glove. She was his Tony Blair to Reagan’s George W. Bush.

Once again Palin had her another interview with Katie Couric moment.

No wonder the Baked Alaskan doesn’t stray very far from Fox Fabricated News.

What would it have been like had the aide coaching Palingiven her three guesses as to who Margaret Thatcher is and what was her claim to fame? The Baked Alaskan’s guesses could’ve been something like this:

Aide: “Do you know who Margaret Thatcher is?”

Palin: “You bet’cha. She was the first lady of our 22nd president … President, uh, President Larry Thatcher!”

Aide: “That’s incorrect. Would you like to try again? Who is Margaret Thatcher?”

Palin: “Now I remember. She’s the Australian tennis player who won at Wimbledon in the 1990s. I remember reporting about her when I was a sportscaster in Alaska.”

Aide: “No. That’s not right either. One last try. Do you know who Margaret Thatcher is?”

Palin: “The actress who married Ellen DeGeneras?”

That was then, this is now. Palin is smarter —- celebrity smarter. No knowledge of the facts or answers on how “ya go about fixin’ things.” She knows how to make money off her own celebrity. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

But it’s another story when 59 percent polled don’t believe she’d be an effective president. She might have to know things like: What was The Marshall Plan? (“You bet’cha I know. Penny Marshall had a plan to make the movie “A League of Their Own” and the rest is history —- it’s the best sports movie about women.”)

Still, Palin has had a resounding effect on candidates running for House, Senate and governor this fall. Her record is something like 15 candidates she backed winning, and 11 she backed losing. There’s a sports metaphor stat for you.

And that’s scary —– because most of the candidates she backed who have won are blithering idiots. So Palin’s success has gone beyond her celebrity status —- she’s responsible for creating candidates in her own image.

After the November elections, we could be re-entering an era of Dumbocracy.

We had eight years of Dumbocracy under George W. Bush. Now the nostalgic center right of the GOP (not the lunatic Palin-fringe) put up billboards asking if we miss President Forrest Gump yet.

We’ll see how far that knuckle ball travels if Republican candidates bring up Gump’s name in campaign ads this year. It would be a far cry from 2008 when GOP candidates acted likehe was a salmonella tainted egg.

The Palinistas are coming, The Palinistas are coming.

Hell, the Palinistas are here.

You’ve got your whackaloons like Sharron Angle, who is running to unseat Senate Majority Leader Harry “Droopy” Reid in Nevada. Angle wants to abolish the EPA, Social Security and the department of education.

Them higher learnin’ institutions is dangerous. They’s anti-God and fill impressionable minds with that evil evolution stuff.

As insipid as Angle is and continues to prove whenever she avoids talking to any media except Fox Fabricated News, the winning loon this week is, hands down, Jan Brewer, the governor of Arizona.

She’s a YouTube sensation because of her debate debacle the other night against her Democratic challenger Terry Goddard.

Brewer’s performance at the debate looked like a scene out of “The Last Exorcism.” She looked possessed. One was waiting for her head to spin around while she spewed pea soup.

Or maybe it was just the ultimate senior moment —- caused by her being gooned on her meds.

Alcohol is also a possibility. Or maybe she ate the brown acid.

In any event, Brewer has been drinking the Kool-Aid since she’s been in office. Which has been 600 days. We know this because she mentioned it during the debate in her opening statement, when she wasn’t laughing, or making the ultimate idiotic quote so far this election season: “We have did what was right for Arizona.”

Not since President Gump’s “Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?” has there been something so uniquely a byproduct of Dumbocracy.

On several occasions, Brewer turned up the scare old white folk rhetoric with crud like illegal immigration in Arizona was the product of headless bodies being discovered in the desert.

When her opponent challenged her to address that, she pressed the panic button and could only respond with the Republican talking point of “oh ya, you’re a tax and spender” baloney.

Brewer never responded to that question during the debate, or afterwards when reporters kept pressing her to answer the headless bodies in the desert scare tactic. Brewer again looked dazed and confused and responded with the obligatory “he’s a liberal” GOP babble.

In fact, talking to the press post-debate, Brewer looked like Custer must have at Little Big Horn.

Brewer is the same candidate who recently pulled her campaign ads from a CBS TV affiliate in Phoenix because they were investigating members of her administration for possible ethics violations.

The poor dear — with the deer-caught-in-the-headlights look. Not to worry, Fox Fabricated News will come to your defense. They’ll blame it on the liberal press corps for harrassing you because you want your state to be fascist.

And the scardey old white folk who only keep their TV on Fox because they want to believe the world is dangerous with that Muslim in the White House will support you anyway.

Brewer, who says she will not participate in any more debates, is an embarrassment — but a thoroughbred in the field of candidates of the resurrection of Dumbocracy. She’s a craggy old dame who has been angry at anybody not white all of her life. Her idea of being progressive is having a shot of Wild Turkey with a beer. Preferably before a debate.

Ironic ain’t it? This is the only legitimate time that the Republicans can blame President Obama for doing something tragic to the nation: Had he not appointed former Arizona Gov. Janet Napolitano as Homeland Security secretary, there would never have been a Gov. Jan Brewer, the fresh new Golden Girl face of Dumbocracy.

Going into the debate, Brewer had a 19 point lead over her challenger. She’ll probably win by more than 10 points. Even after this debacle. Arizona is becoming the Afghanistan of America anyway, so let that state have her.

In order to get there, it’s now time for Brewer to be reprogrammed by Fox Minister of Propaganda Glenn “Fraud is My Co-Pilot” Beck, who will have her wrapped in the flag and Christianity before the next unconfirmed headless body is discovered in the desert.

One can only pray that Brewer and Angle, whose mission it seems is to make Palin come off like Churchill, get elected.

Religion and politics mix this election year.

Vote them all in, America.

Never mind that a year from now you’ll be saying, “God, what was I thinking?”

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