50 ways to blame Obama

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At least cable news isn't using sports metaphors this time out.

It's a GOP tidal wave forecast for election day.

Democrats will be victims of an angry voter tsunami.

Weather forecast metaphors.

Here comes Hurricane Sarah and it's going to hit Obamaland and cause so much damage jobs will be lost. Those of Democratic incumbents, that is.

Get ready for the new GOP with a "Contract on America" this time around.

House Minority Leader John "Bad Tan" Boehner is so over-confident of a GOP landslide (caused by that angry voter monsoon) that he's cording off space in the blueprint of the House Speaker's office for a tanning booth.

Someone call Snooki.

If the GOP was a Beatles song it would be "Get Back (to the Bush tax cuts era)"

Other true life characters and their Beatles songs:

1. "Misery" ----- the only company "Deadeye" Dick Cheney enjoys.

2. "It's All Too Much" ---- what Obama must be thinking every day on the job.

3. "Let it Be" ---- what anyone in their right mind should be telling that goober pastor in Florida who is orchestrating a "Burn a Koran" hate day this weekend.

4. "Eight Days a Week" ---- how many times George W. Bush was on vacation while being co-president.

5. "I Should've Known Better" ---- what McCain is still saying to himself for picking Palin as a running mate.

6. Congressman Joe "You Lie!" Wilson as "The Fool on the (Capitol) Hill."

7. "The Word" ---- what Glen "In Fraud We Trust" Beck believes only he can deliver.

8. "I'm a Loser" ---- what many incumbents will be singing after November.

9. "I Don't Want to Spoil the Party (So I'll go) " ---- what whackaloon Arizona Gov. Jan "There's headless bodies in the desert --- I've seen 'em" Brewer should be singing to save the GOP any further embarrassment.

10. "Something" ---- what Sarah Palin wishes she knew.


Speaking of pop music hits, the Republicans and their lunatic right wing Svengalis could write a song about President Obama.

So here it is ----- the Grand Ole Party-down's song, sung to the tune of Paul Simon's hit "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover."

"50 Ways to blame Obama"


"The numbers are adding up categorically.

Pessimism works to our advantage significantly.

Come November on top of the world we're gonna be.

Because there's 50 ways to blame Obama.

50 ways to blame Obama.


"No one's got a job, Bob

He'll mess up Afghanistan, Stan

People are easy to con, John

Just scare 'em to death, Seth

And vote GOP.



"He wasn't born in the U.S., Tess

He's not one of us, Gus

He hates anyone white, Dwight

He wants to kill granny, Annie

And turn America over to the enemy.


"There's 50 ways to blame Obama.

50 ways to blame Obama..."



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About this blog

John Bruno is a copy editor for the Los Angeles News Group. Send e-mail to John at john.bruno@inlandnewspapers.com.

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This page contains a single entry by John Bruno published on September 7, 2010 6:34 PM.

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