Sen. John McCain is slip sliding away into dementia.
On one of those Sunday news shows, the loser of the 2008 presidential election compared Mama Grizzly to Saint Ronald Reagan.
Mr. McCain, surely you jest.
“My friends, I never jest. And don’t call me Shirley.”
That’s a tribute to actor Leslie “Good luck, we’re all counting on you” Nielsen of “Airplane!” and “The Naked Gun” movie fame, who passed away on Sunday.
McCain is starting to sound like the Lt. Frank Dreben character Nielsen played in those “Police Squad (in color!)” TV shows and then in the movies.
No one could pick up the mantle to play that part that Nielsen made his own, but McCain can give it his best shot while he’s in the Senate.
Since he’s no longer a maverick.
How is Palin like Reagan? Let’s count the ways, former war hero-turned-coward Senator:
1. Reagan was governor of California for two terms.
Palin was governor of Alaska for two years.
2. Reagan told a Russian leader to “tear down this wall.”
Palin used to see a Russian leader’s head hovering over Alaskan airspace.
3. Palin’s husband’s name is Todd.
In his last year as president, Reagan thought everybody’s name was Todd.
4. Reagan liked jelly beans.
If McCain-Palin would’ve won in 2008, the Secret Service’s code name for VP Palin was going to be “Bubblegum.”
5. Reagan played second banana to a chimpanzee in “Bedtime for Bonzo.”
Palin’s daughter could use that same title for the movie about the night she and the Missing Link Levi Johnston did the nasty.
6. Reagan said “All great change begins at the dinner table.”
In one of her over-paid speeches, Palin asked of Obama, “How’s that hopey-changey thing workin’ for ya?”
7. Reagan said “Facts are stubborn things.”
Palin doesn’t have to worry about facts, she works for Fox News.
8. Reagan said “One picture is worth 1,000 denials.”
Palin says “One speech is worth about $75,000.”
9. Ronald Reagan always manned up.
Palin is worried that freaky godless liberal scientists are going to use stem cell research to force women to actually grow a pair.
10. When cowboy Ronald Reagan spoke it was pure populism —- like it was coming straight from the horse’s mouth.
Palin speaks straight from the other end.