Meet the Heatles

      Recently LeBron James referred to his team the Miami Heat as The Heatles.
   He said the team, which is looking more dominant as the NBA season progresses, is like The Beatles.
   The Heatles. Get it?
   What are the similarities?
   There’s got to be “Something.”
   When someone famous compares himself to someone else famous one just can’t “Let it Be”:
   1. The most obvious comparison/similarity is that Paul McCartney’s birth first name is James.
   LeBron James. James Paul McCartney.
   2. In 1966, John Lennon took a lot of “heat” when he said that The Beatles were bigger than Jesus Christ.
   All of the Heatles are bigger than Jesus, too —- they’re all 7 feet tall or taller. Jesus was apparently only of average height.
   3. The Beatles are in the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame, located in Cleveland.
   LeBron used to play for the Cavaliers, who play in Cleveland.
   4. The first line from The Beatles’ “Back in the U.S.S.R” is “Flew in from Miami Beach….” 

LeBron now owns Miami Beach.
   5. Ringo Starr got his nickname because he wears a lot of rings. LeBron James… OK he  doesn’t have any NBA championship rings. Forget that one.

Anyway, “It Won’t Be Long” before LeBron and The Heatles decide they should record an album.

Well, the “Wait” is over.  The critics will probably say “There’s a Place” for it. Unfortunately they’ll say send it “Across the Universe.”

But here’s an album of retitled Beatles songs The Heatles could record that some might enjoy “Anytime at All”:

“Meet The Heatles”

   Side One:
   1. “Ob-la-di-ob-LeBron”
   2. “Don’t Bounce Pass Me By”
   3. “Long Tall John Salley”
   4. “Backboard (singing in the dead of night)”
   5. “And Your Larry Bird Can Sing”
 

     Side Two:

5. “The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill Russell”