President Obama is here on the Left Coast. The land of milk and honey —- and Hollywood money.
Today he’s in Northern California where the girls are warmer where he’s conducting the first ever presidential Facebook town hall meeting.
Fox News looks at it another way, perhaps: “Obama in California on April 20th —– Hitler’s birthday. Coincidence? We decide and make you believe it’s a report.”
Were the Facebook questions screened? If not, the president would get inquiries along these lines:
1. “Are you the first Muslim to use Facebook?”
2. “How many homegrown terrorist Facebook fans do you have?”
3. “Pulled the plug on any grannys lately?”
4. “Hillary here. Is Bill with you?”
5. “It’s The Donald. I’m the last person you want to run against. I just got the endorsement of Gary Busey. Now if I can land Mel Gibson and Nick Nolte I’ll have the trifecta — the rogue’s gallery of celebrity police mug shots. Top that, Mr. Nobel Peace Prize.”
6. “Mitt Romney here. Trump is gaining on me in the polls. And he says lamebrain things like just “go into Libya and take the oil.” I ask you, how’s he gonna do that? I know, he’ll go up to Khadafi and say “You’re fired!” Just like he does on TV. The GOP needs another celebrity like I need another wife.”
7. “Hi. It’s the guy who Dick Cheney shot in the face on that hunting trip. I bet you think it’s funny that I should appear on Facebook after getting a bunch of buckshot in the kisser by a meglomaniac politician. Funny, ha-ha. What, am I a clown? Am I here to amuse you? How the @#$!@ am I so funny?”
8. “Hi. It’s Hillary again. Did you tell Bill that you wanted him to go undercover at that strip club in West Hollywood with the pseudo-lesbians to see if Republicans are still spending campaign contributions?”
9. “Hey, close call with the first lady landing at Andrews Air Force Base. Looks like Ronald Reagan was ahead of his time firing those air traffic controllers, huh?”
10. “Just asking: Since there’s so much plastic surgery going on there on the Left Coast, shouldn’t it be called FaceliftBook?”
Obama’s social media event calls for a song. Call it “On Facebook.” It should be sung to the tune “On Broadway” —- made famous first by The Drifters, and later by George Benson:
“They say Obama is making history today.
He’ll win back young voters, they all say.
So how’s the GOP gonna beat this guy?
All the contenders are a far cry.
Besides, everybody sees eye-to-eye
“They say Sarah Palin spends all day
Not talking policy but the Royal Wedding day.
Mama Grizzly can’t decide whether to run.
After two years she’ll say “I’m done.”
And anyway presidents can’t have any fun
“They say The Donald is sans toupee
A prank by Joe Biden, some say.
He wants the presidency for the power.
The White House will become Trump Towers.
No matter, we’ll wile away the hours