The end of the world is coming on Saturday.
Or so some doomsday soothsayers are saying.
Coincidence that this ties in with Oprah’s final show?
The end of the world. After the week that Arnold and Newt have had they may be saying to themselves “And not a moment too soon.”
In any event, Fox News is blaming President Obama in advance just in case it does happen.
Don’t put it past Glenn Beck to believe he’s got a free pass when the Rapture comes and souls are called to Heaven (conducted by the spirit of Ronald Reagan, no doubt.)
The cretin behind this latest scare America tactic is an 89-year-old evangelist named Harold Camping, who stands to make a cool $70 million off all this, thanks to ignorant believers and backers who promoted this insanity.
So what’s unfair or fair about the world maybe ending Saturday? Well:
It’s unfair: Ashton Kucher just Tweeted that he “hit the Lottery” by getting Charlie Sheen’s old job on “Two and a Half Men” (which was going to change its title midseason when Demi Moore joined the cast of “Two and a Half Men and a Cougar.”)
On the lighter side: Everytime fatalists cry “Armageddon!” some wise guy would go berserko grande and yell “Armageddon outta here!”
On the plus side: Pundits, politicians and newscasters on cable TV news will finally use the tired cliche “at the end of the day” for the last time.
Poetic justice: The world won’t get to read Dick Cheney’s memoir “In My Time” that’s due out in August. One critic read the galleys and said the book was trite, boring, plodding and that trying to get through it was pure torture.
OK that’s not true. Neither is this —— other titles Cheney might have considered for his memoir:
1. “True Lies”
2. “I’m with Stupid”
3. “The Snear of Living Dangerously”
5. “If you think you know Cheney, You don’t know Dick”
Word is there will also be a CD with the book —- and Deadeye Dick will sing a few songs, retitled to suit his dark purpose. They include:
“Smoke on the Waterboarding”
“Snear, There and Everywhere”
“My Heart will go on (so deal with it)”
Who’s kidding who? Dick Cheney looking to entertain people and be more likeable?
Hell, the world would end before that would ever happen.