It used to look like the Republican field of presidential hopefuls for 2012 were on the bench. Now everyone and their brother wants to step up to the plate.
The first Republican presidential debate —- or as it’s also known, the Fox News repertoire company of performance artists —- was held Monday in New Hampshire.
The usual suspects like Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul and Mitt Romney were joined by new kids on the block Michele Bachmann, Herman Cain, Tim Pawlenty and Rick Santorum.
Not surprisingly, the coulda been a contenders drubbed President Obama over his handling of the economy and his painstaking health care plan.
Note to GOP contenders for the nomination, using the term Obamacare has run its course. It joins “at the end of the day,” “disconnect,” and “slippery slope” as words and phrases that are as tired as Rudy Guiliani talking about his heroism on Sept. 11.
The debate finished without any candidate attacking the other. Bummer, it’s always fun to see who one-ups the other. Maybe they were keeping their thoughts to themselves.
So what was going through their minds while the other had the floor? Take your best guess as to who was thinking what:
1. “I hope no one got hold of that Twitter exchange I had with Anthony Weiner.”
2. “Is that an earring from Tiffany’s that Newt is wearing?”
3. “There’s a ticket for you, America, Romney and Bachmann. They could use the slogan ‘Mitt and Nit-wit.’ “
4. “Herman Cain is here. What, did somebody order a pizza?”
5. “Mitt Romney… He looks like the guy who always scores the highest bid at those bachelor auctions for ‘charity.’ “
6. “I can’t stop imagining Michele Bachmann dressed as a dominatrix.”
7. “Tim Pawlenty… He looks like the void of personality pharmacist who fills your prescription for high blood pressure.”
8. “Ron Paul has about as much chance of getting the Republican nomination as Ru Paul.”
9. “If Mitt Romney had a Broadway show it would be called ‘The Book of Moron.’ “
10. “I shouldn’t have had that third cup of coffee. I swear I saw Michele Bachmann’s head spin completely around and her teeth sport fangs.”