Princess Whackaloon

      The more we learn about GOP presidential hopeful Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, the more she appears to be what she can’t or won’t disguise: a major league whackaloon.
      The female Tasmanian Devil apparently never read the controversial slavery language in the preamble of a pledge that she was first to sign that dealt with the sacred bond of matrimony, right wing-nut style.
      The controversial language reads in part, “Slavery had a disastrous impact on African-American families, yet sadly a child born into slavery in 1860 was more likely to be raised by his mother and father in a two-parent household than was an African-American baby born after the election of the USA’s first African-American President.”
       You know, slavery was better for African Americans back in the day than it is for them today.
       Bachmann is the social issues candidate and is a big proponent of marriage defined as only between a man and a woman.
       Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
       But that’s not good enough. Princess Whackaloon and her Christian therapist (?) hubby, Marcus, run the Bachmann Clinic where they get people of the homosexual persuasion to “pray away the gay.”
       Not that there’s anything wrong with that either.
       Wait a minute…. Bachmann’s husband is a therapist, pseudo-pychologist? Does he really ever have to leave his own house? Talk about your home-schooled mental patient.
       Princess Whackaloon has even more interesting stuff in her background, besides having an interesting-looking background: From 1988 to 1992, she worked for the IRS. That’s right, the Queen of the Tea Party anti-tax patriots used to be a tax collector.
       That career move deserves to be honored in a song. Well, lyrics anyway. So here’s the premiere of “Whack-mann” —- which should be sung to The Beatles’ “Taxman,” written by the late, great George Harrison:
               “Let me tell you how screwed up we’ll be
               (Whack-mann)
                if I’m ever elected to the presidency
               (Whack-mann)
               I’ll pledge to end gay marriage and pornography
               (Whack-mann)
               and rewrite what I don’t like about history.
               ‘Cos I’m Michele Whack-mann,
               Ya, the Whack-mann.
                     “If you’re a bleeding heart
                     I’ll deport you to Paraguay.
                     If you support Obama
                     You’re not a man anyway.
                     If you don’t watch Fox News
                     Rupert will hack you someday.
                     If you don’t follow Jesus
                     You can’t pray away the gay….”

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