The House of Representatives pulled a Boehner.
Well, they yanked the House Speaker’s original debt-ceiling limit plan, which he announced not in front of TV news cameras or to the American people en masse, but rather on the radio program of America’s Bully, Rush Limbaugh.
It didn’t pass tea party muster, so he was forced to revise it. This resulted in John Boehner getting all red in the face, which is at least a change of pace from his usual orange hue.
One tea party genius came up with the idea to “lower the debt ceiling,” which is like saying your teeth are alright but your gums have to come out.
N.Y. Democratic Sen. Chuck “are the TV cameras ready” Schumer referred to Boehner dealing with the upstart tea party newbies as “a fringe on his caucus.”
Sounds painful. So if it persists for more than four hours, call your doctor right away.
Earlier this week, Boehner was overheard saying “I didn’t sign up to go mano-a-mano with the president.” Bawk, bawk, bawk, bawk.
And House Majority Whip Eric Cantor smirked that “the debt limit vote sucks.” Here’s an idea, try another profession that’s less sucky, putz. The country will thank you.
There have been a lot of interesting, if not personal, comments about how this whole debt-ceiling mess is being handled by the lawmakers who don’t have a clue.
Sen. John McCain blames the tea party for gumming up the works, calling them “foolish” and summing it all up with “it’s unfair; it’s bizarro.” Johnny Mac is of course familiar with bizarro, having acted impulsively by picking Mama Grizzly as his running mate in 2008.
Then there’s Senate Majority Leader Harry “Droopy” Reid, who called Boehner’s plan “a big wet kiss to the right wing.” Pucker up, Sean Hannity.
The vote on Boehner’s revised debt-ceiling limit plan was postponed as this was being written because the Speaker didn’t have enough votes to get a “W” in his column. They may end up voting on it well into the evening, East Coast time.
As of now they have just four days until the debt ceiling collapses and all economageddon breaks lose.
In the words of Atticus Finch in “To Kill a Mockingbird” to the jury: “For God’s sake, do your duty.”
In the meantime, the Boehner situation needs a song. Well, lyrics to a famous pop tune from the 1960s, anyway. So here is “Speaker of the House,” sung to the tune “Leader of the Pack,” made famous by the great girl group the Shangri-Las:
“We met him on election night
so humble he shed a tear
Know what I’m saying (yes we hear)
He’s a Fox News puppet (the Speaker of the House.)
“He’s always putting the president down (down down)
His party uses film clips from “The Town.”
He’s prone to break down and cry
No one really knows why.
He smokes 2 packs a day (the Speaker of the House.)
“His motto is “never let them see you sweat”
He’s not willing to spend the country into debt.
He’s got the tea party’s back
if he didn’t he’d be sacked.
He’s Rush Limbaugh’s lap dog (the Speaker of the House.)”