Lampooning vacation

     President Obama is starting his 10-day vacation and you too can write the lead to how Fox News will “report” it.
   Ready? Here goes:
     “Day one of Obama on vacation while millions of Americans look for work. He’s in Martha’s Vineyard and the optics of being there, that liberal bastion of big money and elitism where nobody is worried about being unemployed, does not paint a pretty portrait. We report. You decide.”
   OK, so the White House says it’s a working vacation, and no president is ever not being informed about what is going on.
   Here’s another fact, since he’s been in office, Obama has taken 61 days vacation.
   Compare that to George W. Bush, who at two and a half years into his presidency, was on vacation 180 days. And a lot of that time was after we were attacked on 9-11 and the threat of another terrorist attack was scaring the bejesus out of everybody.
   By the way, W. was on vacation when that ominous daily briefing “bin Laden determined to attack America” was ignored. There was W. pullin’ branches and twigs and plantin’ shrub at his ranch in Crawford, Texas.
   Like Clint Eastwood said as Dirty Harry Callahan, “A man’s got to know his limitations.”
   Aside from all of that, if this really is a working vacation, maybe the “optics” would’ve been more acceptible if Obama spent his vacation standing in line at that jobs fair in Atlanta to see what it’s like to be out of work and running out of that hope he talked about during the 2008 campaign.
   Putting petty complaints about where the president is vactioning aside for the moment, it’s a fact he’s losing support among his most ardent supporters.
   There are two main things he could do between now and election day 2012 to change all that:
   First and foremost, stop being the human Charlie Brown from the “Peanuts” comic strip. The hapless do-gooder who is consistently being fooled by Lucy van Pelt, who always too easily convinces him to trust her that she won’t pull that football to the side when he’s ready to kick it. But she always does and Charlie Brown always ends up falling flat on his back because he trusted her.
   Mr. President, we don’t need Charlie Brown. We need Bad, Bad Leroy Brown.
   Secondly, you have to put Hillary Clinton on the ticket with you next year. Joe Biden brought little to the table in 2008 and he’s neutralized now. Hillary has been the best soldier in your administration and the vice presidency is a natural progression for someone a lot of people, including many who voted for you, now believe would have been a better president. She brings a lot to the table, not only the women vote but the lunch-pail middle-class workers in important states like Pennsylvania and Ohio.
   In the meantime, enjoy your working vacation. Let’s give it song lyrics. So sung to The Beatles’ “Martha My Dear” here’s “Martha’s Vineyard”:
               
 ”Martha’s Vineyard, where I spend my time away from D.C.
  Please. Be good to me, Martha’s Vineyard.
  Drinking Long Island Iced Teas.
  On Martha’s Vineyard.
                
  ”Americans can’t find jobs wherever they look and I’m taking the heat.
It’s a working vacation if you believe it’s so
I should have picked the Poconos.
Not elite. Silly me.
 
“Martha’s Vineyard, the Kennedys have always been my inspiration.
Please. Rescue me. Martha’s Vineyard.
I’m becoming Dick Cheney. 
Martha’s Vineyard.”