President Obama attended a DMC fundraiser in NYC on Monday. Wonder if he asked if there were any millionaires in the crowd and were prepared to do battle in a little “class warfare.”
Earlier in the day, Obama was talking tough in the Rose Garden (really, if a president is going to talk tough, you would think he’d pick a better venue than a rose garden) saying millionaires gotta pay more in taxes.
Obama carried over his tough talk at the fundraiser, saying it’s now come down to a battle for “hearts and minds” and that the stakes are enormous. Wonder if he started his fundraiser speech with some attempts at humor. Since it’s no-holds-barred anymore, maybe he should’ve tried these on for size:
1. “I heard that book about Sarah Palin says she has an affinity for black athletes. Just the same, she won’t be invited for a one-on-one at the White House basketball court anytime soon.”
2. “Speaking of books, there’s one about the alleged dissent by some in my administration. I don’t want to say the book isn’t factual, but the forward was written by Rupert Murdoch.”
3. “The Republican contenders are all having an audience with Donald Trump. Here’s an idea: Eliminate the Republican primaries and get on a TV show this January called “Presidential Apprentice” and have The Donald fire each one until he picks a winner.”
4. “My approval ratings are so low, some folks skipped this fundraiser so they could be in the audience at the Charlie Sheen roast over at Comedy Central.”
5. “A six-ton satellite the size of a bus is breaking apart and hurling toward Earth. It will crash and burn. They’re calling it the Michele Bachmann.”
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Texas Gov. Rick “I feel the need to secede” Perry, one-man posse, tracked President Tin Horn to NYC. Perry attacked Obama, saying he’s an appeaser (a popular GOP buzz word) to Palestinians.
The Cowboy and the Tin Horn in the Big Apple at the same time. Get outta town, pilgrim. Perry was all rootin’ tootin’ guns a blazin’ supportin’ Israel while Obama was appeasin.’ But like any politician, Perry wasn’t sayin’ what he was really thinkin.’ Such as:
1. “Shoot, I’d trade in my stetson and wear one of them yamahas on my head if it meant protectin’ my yiddisha little buddies.”
2. “I know all about mennorah —- we have a lot of cows in Texas.”
3. “Passover is what’s gonna happen to Mitt Romney again in the Republican primary.”
4. “It’s good to be in New York. Talk about your Jewish state.”
5. “When Jesus comes back, you people ain’t gonna kill him again, are ya?”