Fantasy football

    Los Angeles almost got an NFL team. The lowly Minnesota Vikings looked like they might move to La La Land.  Or as Fox news calls it, Gomorrah.
  Seems fair, it was The Minnesota Lakers professional basketball team that moved out West to become the L.A. Lakers during the 1960 season.
  Of course the L.A. team kept the Lakers moniker. Worked well in Minnesota with its land of 1,000 lakes.
  Even though the Lakers name is a staple in L.A., it doesn’t fit the state. There are about as many lakes in California as there are kind things to say about anybody from Dick Cheney.
  At least the Laker moniker isn’t as bad as, say, the Utah Jazz.
  Had L.A. landed the Minnesota team, they probably would’ve dropped the name Vikings. The word viking can take on one too many weird images in L.A.
  Some day when L.A. does get an NFL team, the owners and big money people involved will probably have a contest to see who can give the team its new name.
  Just for fun, here are some names those with a controlling interest in the franchise would not take seriously, even in a contest:
     1. The Los Angeles Road Rage
     2. The Los Angeles Dudes
     3. The Los Angeles Cults
     4. The Los Angeles Implants (wait, that would be the cheerleaders)
     5. The Los Angeles Weekend Box Office Gross


      Bonus coverage: More slogans, quotes and random thoughts:
     1. Possible names for rock, punk or heavy metal bands:
         a. Drug-Sniffin’ Dogs
         b. Lapsed Catholics
         c. The Deviated Septums
         d. Karaoke Apocalypse
     2. “Does the name Quasimodo ring a bell?”
     3. “When Serena Williams loses a tennis tournament to her sister, does she experience Venus envy?”
     4. “Fay had her Wray with King Kong.”
     5. “Tailgaters are anal.”
     6. To drivers traveling 35mph in a 55mph zone: “If you were going any faster, you’d be walking.”
     7. To drivers yakking while behind the wheel: “Sit on your cellphone, because that’s where you’re talking out of.”
     8. “Better to be P.O’d than the opposite.”
     9. “I’m not insecure, am I?”
     10. Safe sex slogan: “If you can’t be with the one you glove, glove the one you’re with.”

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