Now that America’s Sweetheart Betty White has announced that she is supporting President Obama for re-election, Fox News has to destroy her.
It won’t do America’s Bully Rush Limbaugh any good calling Betty a sexist word, because she’d revel in it.
So it’s up to Foxholes and Friends to take her down by making stuff up to its audience, the frightened ones, with junk like:
1. “The only reason Betty White is for Obama is she’s an animal activist and she’s been brainwashed into believing Mitt Romney strapped that damn dog to the roof of his car!”
2. “Before starting in television, Betty White ran numbers for the Mob.”
3. “She fixed the 1960 presidential election so Kennedy could beat Nixon.”
4. “She’s into porn.”
5. “She killed a guy in the 1950s.”
Betty’s support for Obama wasn’t the only celebrity news for our celebrity president.
The latest cover of Newsweek magazine is a photo of Obama with a rainbow-colored halo hovering over his head. The words on the cover say “The first gay president.”
This was on the heels of the president coming out for gay marriage last week.
On Monday, Obama gave the commencement address at the all-female Barnard College in New York. On Tuesday, some started calling Obama the first female president.
On Monday night, the president attended a fundraiser sponsored by the LGBT community.
Things that could have happened at that fundraiser, just for fun:
As the president was introduced, the song being played was “I Gotta Be Me.”
Then Obama went into a monologue:
Obama: “It’s good to be here tonight at this LGBT fundraiser. Or as Fox News refers to it, “Apocalypse Now.”
I suppose you all saw the Newsweek cover. I liked it. But I won’t be satisfied until I’m on the cover of People magazine as “The Sexiest First Gay President Alive.”
I’ve been labeled the first gay president and now the first female president. So which one is it? I’m getting harder to define than Mitt Romney.
Speaking of Willard Mitt, he’s so insensitive to gay rights issues he fires men on his campaign staff who out-of-the-blue whistle or hum show tunes.
So, speaking of show tunes, I’ve made a list of songs from Broadway and movie musicals that could be retitled to fit the Mitt:
1. From “West Side Story”: “I Feel Mitty.”
2. From “Funny Girl”: “People, corporations are people.” OK, I used that one last week at the Clooney fundraiser. But it polled well, so it bears repeating.
3. The musical “Fiddler on the Roof” will now be called “Fido on the roof of my car.”
4. Should Mitt be president we’ll all be singing the retitled song from “The Sound of Music” —- “Climb every mountain of debt.”
5. Finally, and this song doesn’t have to be retitled, after Nov. 6 ol’ Willard Mitt will channel “South Pacific” when he sings “This Nearly Was Mine.”