Recently in Rumor, speculation and innuendo Category

This is pure speculation, but reports are flying around out there that Google plans to shoot hydrogen-filled balloons 20 miles into the sky in order to provide wireless services to middle America.

Here's what Google-Watch has to say about it:

Google declined to comment, but bear with me for the rub. These hydrogen-filled balloons float up 20 miles into the stratosphere with electronics that acts like a cell phone tower proxy to deliver wireless services to the thousands of miles of territory I mentioned above.

Of course, these disposable balloons are good for only a day before they pop. The gear they carry relies on gravity and tiny parachutes to get back to earth.

It gets zanier. To launch these balloons, Space Data pays mechanics and dairy farmers $50 a pop to launch the space-bound balloons. While the balloons are cheap, the electronics in them are worth about $1,500. Space Data pays 20 "hobbyists" armed with GPS devices $100 for each device they find.

The Journal story acutely points out that more than a third of rural Americans don't have Internet connections, partly because it's costly to build cell phone towers in areas with so few customers. Space Data claims a single balloon can cover an area normally requiring 40 cell towers.

Who needs cellular towers to muck up middle America when you can use mini cell towers borne by good ole-fashioned balloons?

And no kittens will be involved.