Private ‘stache

fakestash

At the Upland firefighter party last week marking the mustache-growing Movember effort, paste-on mustaches were distributed to anyone who didn’t have the real thing, which almost no one did. I donned one. Councilman Gino Filippi, who did the same, told me: “You kind of have the look of Clouseau.” Flatterer.

Filippi later emailed me a photo he took of me taking a photo. My camera looks absurdly small, like a “fun size” candy car, but it gets the job done (sort of).

fakestash2

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  • Ramona

    Needs straightening. And no, just no.

    One year at Halloween I went to a party dressed as Oliver Hardy complete with a bowler hat and a throw pillow stuffed in my waistband for the extra girth. For the ‘stache I glued on an outrageously large false eyelash. Maybe next time you could try that.

    Seriously, I appreciate the extra effort for a good cause. My grandson also grew a mustache which was long enough to touch his lower lip by the time shaving day came. Good job, all y’all.

    • davidallen909

      I stuck the mustache on by feel because I didn’t have a mirror!

  • DebB

    I’ve never understood people’s distaste for Neil Diamond. I’m not enough of a fan to quote lines like you guys, but I’ve always liked him and his music.

    • davidallen909

      Oh, he’s okay, a little overblown and Vegas-y at times, but he’s made some good records. When Gustavo asked why anyone ever hated him, I couldn’t resist offering some evidence.

      • Doug Evans

        Just for the record… I know all the songs you guys were texting and I was singing along with your column (though I’m pretty sure the one lyric is: “…And no one heard at all, not even the chair,” which is when you know you’re really lonely. I guess. I was writing this to defend my man Neil but that line doesn’t really help my cause.) Anyway, Neil’s songs are great, up to and including “Forever in Blue Jeans”! Though to be fair that may be because as a kid I thought he was singing “Reverend Blue Jeans,” which made no sense in context but which I thought was a pretty cool idea for a song!

        • davidallen909

          That’s a wonderful mishearing, Doug. “Reverend Blue Jeans, meet Son of a Preacher Man.”

          (Rev. Blue Jeans could be the preacher in Brother Love’s Traveling Salvation Show!) (See, I know my Neil. And my Dusty Springfield.)

          I feared I had a few words off in I Am, I Said. Dave Barry rated that lyric highly in his Book of Bad Songs. He said something along the lines of, Neil, it’s not going to hear you. It’s a freakin’ chair.

  • Theodore Melendez

    OMG!!!!

    • davidallen909

      That can’t be a compliment.