Phanaticism

The Phillie Phanatic is the greatest phriggin’ sports mascot in the history of the phree world. But that is just my personal opinion, so pheel phree to disagree if you pheel so inclined. Anyway, he took this scantily clad woman out of the stands during the last inning break and was dancing on top of the Phillies dugout with her. The idea was for her to watch him closely and repeat every dance move the Phanatic did, and she managed to keep up with him pretty well until right when the song was ending, and the Phanatic grabbed the bottom of the phront of his Phillies jersey and yanked it up, showing off his green, phurry belly. Wisely, the woman declined to repeat that move. … The only major-league player ever to have his name included in the title of a Stephen King novel came on for the Phillies to start this inning and issued a leadoff walk to Matt Kemp, who stole second and scored on a single by Kent. Loney followed Kent’s hit with a blooper that Pat Burrell couldn’t come up with in left, and Burrell lost the ball just long enough for Kent to take third. Martin up now, still nobody out. … Dodgers 3, Phillies 1, top 8

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