Milwaukee, immortalized on film

Greetings from the only city in the National League that doesn't have a Westin. ... Last night, as I was driving the rental car from the airport to the rather shopworn Sheraton Brookfield in Brookfield, Wis., the same hotel where I ALWAYS stay here, I suddenly remember one of my favorite scenes from one of my all-time favorite movies, a little British comedy called Love, Actually, which was released in 2003 and which most of you have probably seen. For those who haven't, it had a huge, ensemble cast and about a dozen different plotlines, some of which intersected and some of which didn't. One of the ones that was just kind of floating out there unattached was this one about this guy named Colin, who had no luck whatsoever with women, so he decides he's going to move to the U.S. on the theory that American women will be impressed by his British accent. So he informs his best buddy in the car one day that ``I'm off in three weeks for a place called ... WISCONSIN!!! Wisconsin babes, HERE COMES COLIN!!!!!'' So the guy lands in Milwaukee, jumps in a cab, says ``Take me to an American bar, ANY American bar,'' and the cabbie obliges. So Colin walks into a bar and orders a Budweiser (which in real life is a huge no-no in Milwaukee, but this was a movie), and he immediately meets these three Wisconsin babes, played by Ivana Milicevic, January Jones and Elisha Cuthbert, and of course, he ends up going home with all of them, and when he gets there, a fourth roommate, played by Shannon Elizabeth, also comes home. ... So the point of this story -- and yes, there is one -- is, NOTHING LIKE THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME IN MILWAUKEE. And I have been coming here for a long, long time. Go figure.