Are rumors of performance-enhancing drug use tarnishing your reputation? Write a book!

Worked for Lance Armstrong, right?

Mike Piazza is co-authoring a book with Lonnie Wheeler in which he denies using PEDs, according to Newsday. Earlier this week Piazza was denied election to the Hall of Fame in his first year on the ballot, collecting 57.8 percent of votes, short of the mandatory 75 percent.

How much of that is due to PED suspicions is unclear, but it will be interesting to see if Hall voters are affected by Piazza’s tell-all.

Hope you’re in the mood for some performance-enhancing bullet points …

• Here are some more details about MLB’s adoption of random, in-season blood testing for HGH from the MLBPA release. By taking confidential samples to measure each players testosterone-to-epitestosterone ratio, the league hopes it can curtail testosterone use, as well. Victor Conte, for one, thinks it’s not enough. One early side effect: statements from the U.S. House Oversight Committee calling for better testing in the NFL. But will it lead to cleaner baseball players? Just keep an eye out for unusually skinny players, right?

• More PEDs, from Sports Illustrated*: “We occasionally use Dexamyl and Dexedrine [amphetamines]…. We also use barbiturates, Seconal, Tuinal, Nembutal…. We also use some anti-depressants, Triavil, Tofranil, Valium…. But I don’t think the use of drugs is as prevalent in the Midwest as it is on the East and West coasts,” said Dr. I. C. Middleman, who, until his death last September, was team surgeon for the St. Louis baseball Cardinals.

• Tommy Lasorda and team president Stan Kasten are appearing at the Shomrei Torhah Synagogue in West Hills on Sunday. Details here.

• PEDs, part III: Sammy Sosa has a Pinterest account, a Flickr account, and they’re both awesome.

• Something about those pictures reminded me of the official music video for “Drugs” by Ratatat, which offers better laughs than Gangnam Style.

*date of publication: June 23, 1969.