Let’s get started.

King’s Quest V: Absence Makes the Heart Go Yonder

This is not a good game. I know I’m backtracking from my original statement, but it’s time to acknowledge what everybody else already knew.

It was my first KQ game (and possibly my first Sierra game), and I loved it, and because of that game I’ve played and bought all the others, delved into other series’ and had a great (and frustrating) time learning how to play DOS games in Windows.

But still, it’s not good.

But I get what happened; the Sierra team got some new graphics, adopted the new gameplay interface (a vast improvement from IV), got to use voice acting for the first time and they went nuts with all their shiny new toys, but neglected to craft a story with any depth.

The basic ideas here are solid: the evil villain from III, Mannannan, had a brother, Mordack, and Mordack was a bit angry that his brother is now a cat for all eternity. So Mordack shrinks King Graham’s castle down to bottle size (including all Graham’s family members) and kidnaps them in an attempt to get his brother back in human form, and Graham goes on a journey in a distant land to rescue his kingdom.

Good stuff, but there is no sense of urgency anywhere in the script. Graham doesn’t sound worried or angry about what’s happened; he just completes the same old puzzles he’s always had to do (and he gets to do them this time out with an annoying sidekick).

V really is all about transitions. The game fails in a lot of places, but it did set the groundwork for the good times ahead.

King’s Quest VI: Heir Today, Gone Tomorrow

This is the game I’ve been waiting for. Sure, I’ve played it before, I’ve recommended it and cursed and scowled at it, but I’ve never really gotten just how good this game is. The hype is true; this is the best of the series.

Picking up a bit later from the last game, Prince Alexander has been pining for Princess Cassima (who he met at the end of game five); he’s tried to find out where she lives, but he can find no mention of the Land of the Green Isles anywhere…until the magic mirror Graham found in the first game shows him how to get there.

But when a storm hits the ship he’s on, Alexander is alone in the strange new place, his lady love won’t see him, and his spidey sense keeps telling him that something very bad is going on around here.

He’s right, and Alexander spends the rest of the game working to heal the wounds caused by the evil Alhazrad and his genie pal. And like the previous games, the seemingly unconnected puzzles and gathering do make sense; everything you do comes together to make this moody and sad adventure something joyous…and hey, you’re even given the choice to make things Disney-levels of happiness if that’s what you want for your ending.

Because of all the troubles I had playing when I was younger, I couldn’t love this game then, but now I can say that I do. It’s an amazing experience (especially if you save your game at all the right places), and its ending is worth the struggles to get there.

Next time: We finish up with VII and VIII, as soon as I can figure out how to get the Queen skin to stop being green.

So it’s not surprising that I eagerly waited for “Mass Effect 3.” I even paid extra to get the collector’s edition (it’s silly, but I wanted the FemShep art). And when you come right down to it, I was not disappointed in the game.

Jennifer Hale gives an incredible performance (as usual, but there’s nothing casual about her talent), and more than once I was a little choked up about where the story took me (Mordin!).

The fight mechanics felt a lot smoother than in game two (although this could be more from me finally, finally finding my perfect class, Infiltrator). The story is as compelling as always, and it was amazing to see how these little choices you made throughout the trilogy come back in game three, for better or worse (although since I play the ultimate goody-two-shoes paragon, it was mostly for the better).

And more than either previous game, the War Assets quest drew me into this struggle to save the galaxy more than either previous game. Sure, I made the *wrong* call on more than a few of them, but I didn’t know what would happen, so I got to pick what I wanted to (sure, it’s sounds simple, but it’s true; I read game spoilers a lot and it’s refreshing to be so continually surprised).

The new characters, especially James and Cortez, were just damn fun to hang out with. Helping Cortez with his grief was a quiet little journey for Shepard, but it paid off in the instant attachement I felt to that character.

And somehow, a macho guy like James ended up becoming my MVP for game three. I didn’t always pick him for fights (I tend to prefer Tali and Kaidan), but I never tired of having him around. He’s a manly man if there ever was one, and he also is an exceptional comic relief for all the tragedy enveloping Shepard (his extended conversation with Garrus was one of my favorite moments in the game).

Sure, I didn’t like Javik, but really, who did? I didn’t out and out hate him until he told me to throw Legion out the airlock (bastard!), but I understood him. He will never be my favorite, but he was well written enough for me to hate him without shame (high praise there).

But really, no one wants to talk about that stuff. For months, all anyone has talked about is the ending, and most likely, how much it sucked.

I loved playing this game, and I even liked parts of the ending. Sure, I thought the ending was quite abrupt, and I didn’t like that a five minute chat led to the ending.

But I loved the structure; most games end with a showdown against the big bad, and I really appreciate when games veer away from that pattern. I liked how the broken and battered Shepard still managed to fight off baddies with only a pistol. I liked the last scene with Anderson (although I wish I knew the right number to get him to live).

And I totally loved that this series that was all about choices and their consequences ended with a choice. All options kind of sucked, and well, it’s not easy being a hero. I wish my Shepard had lived, but while I may want the overly gooey happy ending, I would not respect it. I can respect a game that makes me make the hard choice, even when I don’t want to.

I didn’t go in for the scene of the Normandy landing on the distant Eden-like planet, but I understood it; I imagine the gamemakers wanted us to know that our teammates survived, which at the end of the game, I wanted to know that too, even if the scene made more emotional sense than logical sense.

And this will also forever be the game that made me make fun of Buzz mother-frakkin’ Aldrin. Once I knew who that voice was, I felt properly ashamed of myself, but still…the dude walked on the moon and I made fun of him. That’s on you, game!

But the one thing that really, really got me to love the ending was something that seems to drive everybody else nuts: the destruction of the mass effect relays. Hear me out for a second.

I’ve been a fan of “Star Trek” for a long time now, and I have lately found myself becoming a staunch defender of the Prime Directive and all its post-Colonialism influences, and at least in our own history, when a technological superior force has met with an inferior one, things don’t turn out too well for the inferior ones.

And when you think about “Mass Effect,” that’s what happened. A civilization got so strong and so powerful, they were able to get themselves to the stars and found this left behind technology that would let them expand their culture and influence even further, and they never looked back. They jumped ahead and never stopped to think about the people who built the relays. They never took the time to figure out how they worked. They just expected that the relays were there, they had always been there, and they will always be there.

They cheated, and now it’s back to the slow path. It’s a harsh lesson, especially for the ones stranded on Earth (or stranded anywhere), but it was bound to happen. You rely too much on what you don’t understand, and when it’s gone, you’re screwed.

That’s where the game leaves us; on a new world, forced to deal with whatever comes next, with only the tools we can understand and all the galaxy open once again.

Stray thoughts

• What’s your favorite game ending?
• Mine is “Gabriel Knight: The Beast Within.” I had a bad copy of the game when I bought it, and ended up playing chapters 1-5 over and over, thinking that I had done something wrong early on. Once I finally got the fixed discs, the ending was so good I felt the process had been worth it.
• Fun fact: The game takes place mostly in and around Munich; when I went there I insisted on stopping at various places the game featured, including the setting of the final scene (the scene that makes it my favorite), Marienbrcke, the bridge across the way from Neuschwanstein.
• Another fact: That bridge is terrifying. It’s over a gorge 200 hundred feet up, and the wooden planks are shifting underneath your feet as you walk across it, which wouldn’t be so bad, but you’re on this bridge with 200 other people, probably all wondering how stable this thing is. But really, that bridge is the only way you can see this, so…worth it!

Kindle Fire – Here we have the (probable) number one reason behind my blog absence. This tablet is so, so much fun. Sure, it’s not an iPad, but since I loathe all things Apple, it’s a fun (and cheap) alternative. It’s a toy and a damn fun one.

Xenosaga trilogy – If you still have a PS2 (or even if you have less reputable means), I would highly recommend this hardcore sci-fi trilogy. It deals with a lot of the same issues my beloved BSG dealt with (instant pluses there, although I played this before watching BSG), but it also manages to incorporate this epic story across three games. It’s not perfect, and there are a lot of issues with the second game (although the storyline in that one is my absolute favorite), it’s both a fun and thought provoking series to dive into.

“The Big Bang Theory”  - I’ve been hearing good things about this show for years, and when a friend lent us the DVDs, Jim and I finally decided to give the show a shot, and surprise surprise, it’s pretty good. The characters are pretty fun to hang around, and it’s a blast to see a show where the hot woman gets to be as funny as her male counterparts (three cheers for Kaley Cuoco!). Check it out if you haven’t given it a chance yet; you could be in for a treat.

DC Comics – This one is quite the shock. I’ve always, always been a Marvel fan, and I never gave the DC side of the comics world a close look. But then I decide I want to read more Batman, and whoosh, there I see all the undiscovered fun on this side of the aisle. No one does ‘dark’ quite like Batman writers, and damn if I can’t help getting into The Green Lantern too. Weird I say. Weird.

Autobiographical comics  - OK, so I’ve only read 3 (“Fun Home,” “Are You My Mother” and “Drinking at the Movies”), but it’s only my limited funds that’s stopping me from buying more. This entire genre exsisted and I was not aware. This will be remedied (and I’m always up for a good recommendation).

“Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” – I would really recommend reading the book first, but man, this tight and taut spy thriller was a joy to shift through. Gary Oldman gives quite the subdued performance, but it’s magnetic all the same, even in a film that is mostly about research. And for you “Sherlock” fans, Benedict Cumberbatch is another gem in this all-around excellent film. Speaking of “Sherlock”…

“Sherlock”  - You’ve probably already heard all about this one, but the update really, really works, mostly because Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman completely sell the ludicrous (but highly entertaining) adventures this dynamic duo find themselves in.

“Dungeons & Dragons” – This one is more about getting to hang out with some friends, but it’s been a lot of fun getting to flesh out this character I’ve made (a Half-Orc rogue named Bree). My team is slowly becoming a well-oiled killing machine, and we’ve got a lot of adventuring ahead of us. It’s not for everyone, but it’s a hell of a good time (and hey, understanding the ins-and-outs of “Dorkness Rising” makes it all worthwhile).

“Words With Friends” – Come play with me! I’m Albatross117.

“Mass Effect 3″ – I will probably write more about this game later, but “Mass Effect 3″ really stuck with me after finishing it, despite the negative press about the ending, I think it was a fine solution to a problem nobody likes (endings). More to come later, but if you’ve played 1 and 2, it’s worth seeing this trilogy all the way to the end.

“Dragon Age: Origins” – My first Bioware game! I think the second one is actually the better game, but I have a lot more fun with this one, and in my third time through, I finally got the end I wanted AND managed to make my stabby rogue into a super-strong and powerful killing machine. Watch out Darkspawn, I will end you!!!

“Lost At Sea” – I really liked “Scott Pilgrim” the movie, and once I finished the comics (which added a lot more to the secondary characters, especially my favorite, Kim), I decided on a whim to check out Bryan Lee O’Malley’s earlier comic. It’s a wispy little book, but like in “Scott Pilgrim,” he really captured the loneliness and isolation of young adulthood (or at least mine).

“Sports Night” – I’m an Aaron Sorkin fan from way back, and while I’d heard many good things about “Sports Night” back in the day, it was never available in a format I could afford. But now the whole series is on Netflix, and while I’m only halfway through season one, I’m absolutely digging the speeches, the idealism, the witty banter that all come in Sorkin shows. I don’t even like sports, and I can’t help but like this show.

“Misfits” – A group of young adult offenders in England are going about their community service shift when a freak storm gives them all superpowers, and they then have to deal with the having their various powers and the trouble they can cause. Yeah, it sounds like a “Heroes” knockoff (and we all know how that show turned out), but “Misfits” takes a smaller approach. They are just a group, some friendly, some obnoxious, trying to work through their community service with as little effort as possible. It doesn’t sound like much, but it’s a refreshing take on the *superhero* genre. And since it’s British, you also get lots of swearing and the occasional gratuitous nudity, if you’re in to that sort of thing.

“Revenge” – When you come right down to it, I don’t watch a lot of current TV. I really prefer watching at my own pace (breakneck, if you don’t mind), and since I’ve don’t have cable, a lot of stuff just floats past me. But because of my love for the late and lamented “Everwood,” I decided to give this freshman show a chance (despite bad reviews for the pilot), and I was so not disappointed. It’s deliciously soapy and features some tight plotting along with characters you both love and hate. Since the first season just wrapped up, don’t be afraid to dive into this surprisingly fun tale of REVENGE.

That’s it; that’s a sampling what I’ve been up to. It’s been a lot of fun, and I hope you can say the same for the fun stuff in your life.

The season starts off with both Peter Parker and Spider-man on the hunt for the missing Mary Jane, who has been sucked into a cult. In a cunning (and realistic move), this cult leader thrives on lonely folks who have lost someone and uses that pain to keep them under control.

Here begins “Sins of the Fathers” arc, the first of 14 episodes all about dear old dad and how he messed up and/or helped his kids during their formative years.

We open with stories of Mary Jane and her deadbeat dad, and we start branching out from there: we are treated to a tale of The Kingpin and his loser father that morphs
into a tale of Kingpin and his son, which leads to another loss for
our titular villain.

We get to see the home life of Robbie Robertson (seriously? You couldn’t think of another name???), who is a bit oblivious to his son, but comes around in time to save the kid from a life of petty crime. We even check in with Alistair Smythe as he discovers the truth about his father’s demise (and what he plans to do about it).

We even get to check in with some old frenemies, Eddie Brock and his pal Venom…and we get to meet Venom’s new buddy Carnage, probably one of the scariest villains on the
series. Maybe serial killers aren’t the most obvious tactic for a kiddie show, but this one works as a more cartoony Joker-type.

And of course, we get the emergence of the best costumed villain in the Spidey-verse: the Green Goblin (Kingpin of course being the best regular-guy villain). Norman
Osborne finally cracks under the pressure and a new, pissed off being
is born, one intent on murdering all of Norman Osborne’s persecutors.
Spidey finds him out and saves the day, but he lets Osborne go after
the Green Goblin decides to go dormant.

Naturally, that would all be pretty compelling stuff, but what pushes this mini-arc to the next level is Harry Osborne, Mary Jane’s new boyfriend and Peter Parker’s best
friend. He grew up in a cold and lonely house, and when he loses his
father, and then his fiancee, he, not unlike his father, goes a bit
crazy. Sure, it’s the theme of the season, but it’s the best one in
the bunch; Norman made his son the man he is and taught him all the
wrong ways to live his life. Tough break Harry; it won’t get better.

But with all this talk about fathers, we are neglecting the mother of the season: Madame Web. Spidey gets his first taste of this enigmatic and arrogant woman who insists on
helping him with riddles and innuendo. Like all parents, she watches
out for her charge and helps him when needed, but only by giving him
the tools he needs, not by giving him the answers. For a superhero
who is alone in the world, it’s frustrating to have *help* so close,
but she’s always right and she’s always remote.

For better or worse, this season has somewhat plunged Spidey into the fantasy realm. I remember when I was younger not quite getting the *need* for Madame Web and I still feel
that way now…but considering all the things Spidey is going
through, it’s probably good to have some omnipotent being on his side
for once.

Because Spidey is still very much alone out there; sure, he occasionally gets some help from DareDevil, Ironman and Dr. Strange and any other comic book star, but most of
the time, it’s just going to be him, alone in this big city, trying to stop the bad guys from hurting anyone.

Probably the most conspicuous absence from this season, a season all about the “Sins of the Fathers,” is Peter’s father. Where has he been for his son’s life? And why just
a short little tease about his parents during Peter’s trial for treason? Sure, we get another flashback of his Uncle Ben, but we’re left hanging, and while I’m pretty sure we get an answer down the road, right now, it feels like a serious missed opportunity here.

But those are small quibbles. This season really plunged into some emotional depths of the source material. Peter Parker and Spider-man finally get everything worked
out, and then boom, Mary Jane *dies* because of one act of mercy
Spidey committed to help his best friend. It’s a sobering lesson,
sometimes bad things happen to good people who do the *right* thing,
and I’ve never forgotten it. And I doubt I’m the only one.
I’ll be back soon with Season 4, and not to mention the X-Men writeups are coming too.
Stray thoughts

• One thing I’ve really come to appreciate about this show is how women are portrayed. Sure, Spidey fights crime in a boys world, but the women who do come into the picture are pretty positive. From Felicia’s take charge attitude, to
  Mary Jane calling her boyfriends on their bullshit, to Det. Terry
  Lee busting heads, they are small parts but all of them send a good
  message to little girls watching. And when you compare them to other
  woman comic characters…they don’t have a lot of competition in the
  awesome department.

• The kids who show up this season, Maria and Robert, are also pretty good examples of little kids. Maria is a little girl with big heart and a love of Spider-man who
  convinces him, with her smarts and her bravery, to stay in the
  super-hero game. Robert is a kid with a lot of talent for science,
  but who temporarily believes that crime will lead to a better life.
  Two pretty believable characters and/or situations for a kiddie
  show.

• Robert’s episode is an interesting one. While watching it, I was afraid it was coming to be some painfully earnest examination of life in the ghetto. Thankfully, we were spared that, and I will admit that I was surprised when Robert is punished for his crime, albeit lightly. He broke into a place, sure, but he didn’t steal anything, and he’s been a pretty good kid up until then. Most likely, at least in kiddie show world, he’ll learn his lesson and never turn to crime again, but it was a realistic turn for this show.

• But I do hope we never see that Jamaican cab driver again. Sometimes a cliche is a really, really bad cliche.

• “The Spot” probably ended up being the weakest episode, but because the *villain* proved to be both funny and likeable, I’m giving it a pass. Just this once.

• And no doubt, “Enter the Green Goblin” was the highlight of the season, if not the show. I didn’t really remember the Green Goblin being that awesome, especially
  after how much I disliked the first Tobey Maguire “Spider-man”
  movie, but somehow, this kiddie cartoon made the character
  malevolent and unforgettable.

From what I remember, the show placed a
lot of emphasis on the characters and the relationships, not all of
them romantic. Here was a kids’ show that was willing to stretch the
definition of a kids’ show and tell some more adult stories without
pandering to their young audience.

The season opens with Jubilee running
away from her foster parents after they discover that she’s a mutant.
She heads to the mall and incurs the wrath of a sentinel intent on
capturing her…but the X:Men are there to save her, and soon enough
she’s living at the school, learning how to focus her powers and use
them wisely.

But the sentinels are still out there,
intent on capturing and imprisoning mutants (for the crime of being
born, no doubt). The X:Men try again and again to take them out, but
they and their masters keep coming back and they keep trying to end
mutant life for good. It’s a theme of the series and of this season
especially, and while X:Men does place too much attention on the
fights, especially in the early episodes, the writers knew their
craft enough to keep the arc together and meaningful…eventually
anyway.

Now, that’s what I remember, which
isn’t an entirely accurate representation of the story (I probably
should have seen that coming. Oh well).

At least in the first few episodes, the
show is really about the fights. From “Night of the Sentinels”
through “Deadly Reunions,” the writers decided to come up with an
idea and then add as much fighting and destruction as possible. I was
very worried during that first batch that this show I loved would
turn out to be a terrible to my adult eyes.

But then something awesome happened. I
watched “Captive Hearts,” the fifth episode in season one.

Now don’t mistake me, this episode is
not great, and in places it’s a bit slow. But it’s the first episode
where the writers started to focus on their characters. We learn that
Cyclops and Jean Grey are in love…and the Wolverine is in love with
Jean too. We learn that Storm is claustrophobic because a wall fell
on her when she was a child. Finally, we’re getting to see the little
pieces that made this comic so great.

Bit by bit, we get to know our
characters a little bit more; Rogue is sweet on Gambit, and vice
versa, but their relationship can’t really go anywhere; Cyclops
might be a good leader, but he is also a serious douchebag, which
makes me not like him but is good characterization none the less;
Wolverine cares deeply for his teammates, more than he would ever
tell them no doubt. Xavier, while nominally a good guy, is not above
some mental manipulation to get his way.

They all have their secrets and their
weaknesses. They all have something to prove and something to hide.
From here onward, it’s the show I remembered. But that’s not to say
it doesn’t have anything new to offer.

When I was younger, probably around 13,
I read an article by a man where he talked about letting his kids
watch “The X Files” where he casually mentioned that he didn’t
let his kids watch “X:Men” and I wondered why, especially
considering that they are on the side of equality and civil rights.
But now, the pieces are starting to come together.

For all the good the X:Men do, that is
severely offset by the rampant destruction that they cause with their
powers. Sure, they don’t start the fights, but they do their fair
share of property damage just the same.

Another reason to complain: the X:Men
just have no regard for law and order. Colossus was wrongly accused
and arrested for the bank robbery committed by Juggernaut, but it’s
not ok for Rogue and Storm to bust him out of jail just because they
know he is innocent (and really, if they had waited 30 minutes or so,
the cops would have seen Juggernaut rob another bank and realized
they nabbed the wrong man).

That’s not that much different from
Magneto offering to spring Beast from the pokie, except that Beast is
actually guilty of the crime he’s accused of (but for some reason
wants to go through with the trial anyway).

So yeah, really not the best show for
kids, but then again, why should they get all the fun?

Stray thoughts

• I remember really loving Jean Grey
  as a kid, especially once we get to the Phoenix/Dark Phoenix sagas,
  but right now I have to say she is the most overrated X:Men. She is
  the quintessential damsel in distress who can’t do anything with her
  powers without fainting and/or injuring herself, yet somehow she’s
  the second most powerful psychic in the world. Sigh.

• If I hadn’t looked it up, I would
  never have known that Jubilee is actually supposed to be Asian. If
  you do know that you can see it, but the animators sure went out of
  their way to make her as white as possible, which is a real shame.
  There are plenty of white superheros out there; why not give Asian
  girls and boys someone to admire (especially someone as cool as
  Jubilee)?

• One minor complaint: Did Beast
  really have to be locked up the whole season? He’s get the best
  lines, and he’s the smartest guy around. Let him be free!

• One real complaint I have to give
  the series is the costumes. They are (probably) direct lifts from
  the comics, but yikes, I couldn’t stop laughing every time Jean
  shows up in that ridiculous costume (think a full body leotard with
  an awful color scheme). And Wolverine might be a badass, but he’s
  still wearing blue underwear outside of his yellow leotard.

• But they are not all bad. My award
  for best costume goes to Mystique. Maybe it’s the skull belt (with
  the matching hair clip!) that does it for me…maybe it’s the white
  dress on blue skin with red hair scheme that I just love. Yeah, it’s
  the best…with Rogue and Gambit tying for second place.

• Don’t worry, more “Spider-man”
  and “X:Men” are coming. Soon.

And now I get the chance to defend my
claim as we dive into the second season, “Neogenic Nightmare.”

Spider-man has recovered nicely from
his season one adventures, but all is not well in Spidey land. On a
typical patrol, he loses his spider powers. After a trip to visit his
old scientist pal Doctor Connors, Spidey discovers that he’s still
mutating, and that when the mutations stop, he won’t be human any
longer.

That would be bad enough, but Spidey
also has to deal with Kingpin massing a small army of super-villains,
all intent on killing our hero; the return of the Hobgoblin (when
will people learn to just pay that guy???); the arrival of the
Punisher and Blade, two supposed heroes intent on murdering
Spider-man; and probably most importantly, Mary Jane dumps Peter
after he blows her off one to many times.

It’s a hell of season, filled with
guest spots and mini-arcs and old friends and foes, and while the arc
works, and I like the storytelling better, “Spider-man” still has
a way to go before it becomes great.

But let’s start with what works.

First off, Spider-man is still
Spider-man. He’s a dumb kid while still being a genius, and he still
would rather make out with Mary Jane (or Felicia) than fight crime,
but he can’t stop, not even when he’s in violent pains from his
mutations or when he’s grown an extra four arms after taking some bad
potion (or even when he’s transformed into Man-Spider).

One of the strengths of the series is
that for all his abilities and genius, the writers manage to keep
Peter Parker and his alter ego relatable. If you lose that, you lose
the game, and through thick and thin, they keep us right with Peter
and his trials.

And it’s not just Peter who’s getting a
little more flushed out. Some recurring characters, such as Felicia,
Harry Osborne, Deborah and Flash Thompson all get little moments to
shine. The universe is growing just as Peter Parker, Spider-man and
our affection is growing too.

Another plus for this season is they
did find a way to keep the story going, even if I didn’t necessarily
love every twist and turn along the way. Neogenics doesn’t really
make sense (and seriously, when are they going to ban science
and innovation in this world?), but the writers make it matter to us,
and the get a lot of mileage, from Michael Morbius’ transformation,
to the tablet of time, to the “X:Men” cameos, out of this device.

But for all the good things, and all
the progress the show has made…it’s time to talk about what didn’t
work so well.

For starters, there were a lot of
cameos…and as much as I love my “X:Men,” their two-parter this
season was probably the weakest episodes of the season. All the
clich elements from the “X:Men” – the constant fighting,
Wolverine’s punch first, talk later attitude, Xavier’s aloofness -
come out in full force, and it’s much more interested in the fights
than the story. It’s the low point in the season, even if it is what
got me to watch the show way back when.

I’m willing to stretch my disbelief to
absurd levels, especially when it comes to the sci-fi/fantasy worlds
I love, but the tablet of time stuff is just plain silly. For
starters, if this item was really worth $50 million on the open
market, and you suspected thieves were going to try to steal it,
wouldn’t you beef up security just a bit? And I really, really
dislike that it’s just magic in the end, but only because this show
(and presumably the comic) is so intent on grounding the rest of the
universe in science. I know the season was winding down at that
point, but it still feels like a major misstep.

Which leads me to the most troubling
part of this season: the Punisher.

While watching this rather disturbing
two parter, I kept trying to imagine what a seven year old would be
thinking. How would a little kid process this supposed hero who
really goes out of his way to act like a villain.

Honestly, I really couldn’t think of an
answer. Here we have a guy who likes to beat up bad guys but who goes
out of his way to cause as much harm as possible. For example, he
fires a rocket launcher at Spider-man and misses, hitting a building
instead. Hopefully no one was in that building, but I doubt Punisher
was thinking about that (let’s not even get into the fact that he
attacks Spider-man based on the assumption he kidnapped Morbius,
because everyone was doing that).

I want to applaud the writers for
introducing this complex anti-hero figure to a kiddie show, but I
will admit it turned me off Punisher for life. I can get behind
Batman, to a point, because while he is a vigilante, he only uses his
fists in his daily battles against the darkness. Punisher just wants
to kill people, and he can justify that by only killing *bad* guys.
It’s “Dexter” for the kiddie set, and I can’t help but feel
uneasy about that.

So that’s season two in a nutshell, an
ambitious tale that incorporates some awesome and not-so-awesome
elements to tell Spider-man’s battle with his own mutations. Along
the way, he loses both his ladies to other men, but he gets his self
back. Not bad for a season’s work.

Coming soon: Season three, “Sins of
the Fathers.”

Stray thoughts

• Kingpin update: He didn’t get a
  lot of play this season, but when he did show up he was up to his
  old tricks again. He was smart enough to pool the six super-villains
  together to take out Spider-man, and it would have worked, except
  when you hire a bunch of crazy ego maniacs, they probably won’t work
  together to well. And then he got involved with the tablet of time,
  and instead of winning everything, he lost his wife.

• As much as I disliked that
  mini-arc, I did like seeing Kingpin lose something. As she left, his
  wife told Fisk she’s leaving because he doesn’t love her, but I
  think she’s got that wrong. He disrupted the hostage trade for her
  because he was so emotionally involved in the outcome, a first for
  him. But even after getting her back, he still couldn’t stop his
  lust for the tablet. Yeah, he loved her; she’s probably the only one
  he loves…but he didn’t love her enough.

• As I said before, I’m not so keen
  on the *magic* side of this universe, but I can’t help but like
  Blade. He’s not so different than Punisher, and it probably wasn’t
  the best idea to have those two mini arcs air back to back, but at
  least Blade can be reasoned with. And how cool is it that he manages
  to fall in love with Spider-man’s cop buddy?

I was such an “X-Men” nut that when
they were going to appear on “Spider-man,” I gleefully made the
time to check out that other Marvel kids show. Lucky for me, I kept
watching that show about a wall-crawling wisecracker.

After a while, I had to admit that
while my heart will always be with the “X-Men,” “Spider-man”
was the better show. And now that they are both on Instant Watch,
it’s time to look back at both these kiddie shows that left a lasting
impression on this young geek.

One of my theories about “Spider-man”
is that the show is infinitely better when the writers go for the
arcs or the multi-parters, and so far, the first season has pretty
much confirmed that thinking. There’s nothing wrong with the
standalone episodes, but they can feel rushed and/or padded, and the
resolutions are typically unsatisfying.

The episode “Kraven the Hunter” is
probably the best example of the weakness of the single episodes.
It’s sandwiched between two very strong multi-parters, and while it’s
supposed to be a breather, it’s really just kind of pointless. We
meet a new villain with a semi-tragic back story, there’s some
fighting and then wham, Kraven and his sweetie pie ride off into the
sunset. It’s probably not practical to have every episode be part of
an arc (at this early in the game, but I wouldn’t have minded).

It’s a minor complaint (and a complaint
that I know gets corrected in the next few seasons, so we’ll revisit
this theory next time), but this season does what’s it supposed to
do. We meet a lot of Spidey’s enemies (including one that J. Jonah
Jameson helped create!), we meet his friends and (potential)
girlfriends, and we get a clever and quick origin story for this
elusive character.

We also get to discover the Spider-man
is kind of a dick. Between the snarky comments and how he treats
other people when he’s in the costume, Peter Parker gets to unleash
every rotten thing he’s thinking. He even helps foster Eddie Brock’s
resentment and bitterness (from humiliation and put downs, it’s not a
surprise that Brock takes Venom to some dark places).

But what a start for a kids show.
Spidey is in some ways responsible for the trouble he gets in to,
especially with regards to Brock, and his heroism costs him a lot,
from the constant worry about his elderly aunt to his inability to
have a romantic relationship with Mary Jane or Felicia. And for all
his trouble, he still is mostly hated by the NYC people he is always
looking to save.

His heroics are a costly struggle, and
while I wouldn’t want to be Peter Parker, it’s a joy to get to watch
him all over again.

Stray thoughts

• In our world, science is pretty
  awesome, but in the Marvel universe, all science research seems to
  bring about is more super-villains. Where are the political leaders
  and doomsayers calling for a ban on all research and development? I
  bet more than a few NYC residents would sign that petition.

• The TV show reversed the order of
  the Hobgoblin and Green Goblin appearances, but damn if that
  switch-up didn’t create the best two episodes of the season. Two of
  Spidey’s foes, Kingpin and Norman Osborne, square off with while the
  Hobgoblin shifts his loyalty between the two villains. For all his
  silliness in appearance, the Hobgoblin has two things that make him
  so dangerous: a lot of luck and nothing to lose. (Again, all this in
  a kids show!)

• While “Day of the Chameleon”
  wasn’t awful, it was probably the weakest episode of the season,
  which is a double shame as it’s the season finale. The chameleon is
  quite the shapeshifter, but really, the belt should be a dead
  giveaway, especially as it’s always visible. That guy should have
  been found out immediately, and it just made SHIELD and the other
  characters look stupid for not seeing through the disguise. Bad form
  guys.

• And for my last parting word,
  let’s give some praise to the show’s best villain so far: The
  Kingpin. I didn’t really remember him, other than knowing he’s Evil,
  but here is a man who runs a criminal empire, has no morals and
  complete anonymity. He’s also cunning, smart and rational, three
  traits no other criminal on this show possesses. He’s also a man who
  has a secret entrance to his crime lair, an entrance that is lined
  with explosives, just in case. I wouldn’t believe that from anyone
  else on this show, but from him, I buy it.

• I’m not sure when the next
  write-up will be, but don’t worry, we’ll go through it together.

Best Episodes: “The Hobgoblin” (1
and 2), “The Alien Costume” (1-3)