The Half-life of an Epiphany

Paris Hilton is partying again, Bridget reported. I’m shocked. Shocked. Paris said she finally “got it” and matured in jail. Jailhouse epiphanies, however, tend to last as long as ceasefires in Gaza.

Our mayor Antonio Villar didn’t go to jail for his sins of emission, but he did take a one week time out and ruthlessly sentenced himself to no public appearances. This proved his willpower and strength of character. Giving up being in the public view is probably more difficult for him than giving up sex. In any case, he indicates that he too has got it. This actually seems to be the problem. He got it and often. Now the question is if he will be able to focus his, uh, passions.

I referred to his Honor (Hmmmm?) as Antonio Villar because it is not clear if he will retain custody of his compound name—a fusion of his birth name Villar and his soon to be ex-wife’s name, Raigosa. These naming issues are, well, virgin territory for all of us.

The name change might not be a bad way of re-branding himself as a new man. The ex’s suffix could probably be dropped pretty easily and this might create less baggage were he to run for state office—maybe governor. Although, I’m sure the thought never entered his mind.

I’m rooting for the mayor, and hope that his epiphany lasts longer than Paris’. This is indeed a low bar. And Paris would never hang out in a low bar. Only the best.