Global Warming -- SOLVED!
I don't know why I get letters like these, but alas, I do. From today's inbox:
Chris, I am an 88 year old man and I am trying to write a book relating to global warming but I have not been able to find out what the height and position of the pollution belt is. I am very concerned about the effect the pollution is having on the Earth. I need that information because of the two possible solutions I have for eliminating the pollution belt. The first is to fly space ships through the belt with collecter devises that would pick up the pollution. I need that information because I am not sure if the space ships could fly at that elevation. My second idea is to explode an atomic bomb in the pollution and the chain reaction would destroy the pollution. BUT I do not know the height of the belt and do not know if the radiation fall out from the bomb would contaminate the Earth. I would appreciate it if you could help me in any way to find that information. --Name withheld to protect the well-meaning but frighteningly delusional
I have some doubts about the viability of the gentleman's plan, but only because there are no dilithium crystals involved in his idea.
But what do I know? I think piloting a lawn chair lifted in the air by helium balloons is a bad idea, too. I'm obviously incapable of thinking outside the box.
Hey, now, my private emails to you are supposed to stay PRIVATE!!!
That was the most hilarious thing I've heard all day. Humans are really odd.