Litter Frosts My Clams

Fewer things frost my clams more than litter. I’m not sure if it’s the innate selfishness of it or the “someone else can clean it up” aspect or the sheer stupidity/laziness of someone who just can’t manage to keep a piece of paper, wad o’ gum or cigarette butt three seconds longer in order to place it a trash receptacle!!

Here’s where I’m coming from…went to the bank today, nothing special, using the ATM when I notice the snow drifts of those goofy little receipts the machine spits out. I immediately had two questions: 1) How lame are you that you can’t check your balance on the screen, but need a scrap of paper to tell you what’s going on? and 2) Why can’t you be bothered to throw it away in the little slot with the trash icon on it?? You don’t even have to read the word “trash” to know where it goes!

There’s a part of me that wants to call after the person who dumped their receipt and holler at the top of my lung
“Hey, you forgot something!” And don’t even make me get all crazy and have to mention that you’ve left behind this scrap of garbage that has all kinds of your personal information on it!!

I was airing my frustration on this topic with a friend when he told me a particularly funny littering appropriate story…I think I’ll share it: He was driving with a friend when they witnessed a woman toss an empty can of soda out her car window. They were at a stop light at the time, so my friend got out, picked up the empty can and placed it on the hood of the offender’s car. She was so furious, and I hope humiliated, that she just sat there at the light while it change a few times. They eventually had to drive around her. I hope she's STILL sitting there in abject embarrassment.

So what have we learned today, class? THROW IT AWAY, for crying out loud. It won’t KILL you to carry home that shred of ATM paper until you get home…better yet, decline the machine’s kind offer to give it to you in the first place. Thank you. This has been my rant for the day.