There were parts of this book I truly adored, parts where I cried and parts where my shock was made manifest by audible gasps, parts where I read with pride how characters came into their own. But I still found myself wanting more from the book, more of everything, every character. It zipped along so quickly and then zagged toward places I never expected. That's what made it GREAT and at the same time infuriating. I almost felt myself thinking that some fan fiction writers and those who posted their theories daily about the fates of characters had it righter than Rowling did, and that fandom had far more complex ideas about the storylines and archs, nature versus nurture, or the need for tidy endings.

I can't emphasize enough how much I love J.K. Rowling's writing, her dialog, her humor, the morality risks she's willing to take that are really so brave. She goes down some really ugly and flawed roads. And I love the fact that I feel like I'm magically entering and enchanted diary, if you will; her scenes are all around me when I read her books. I feel as though I am there, right in it. Nothing holds my interest quite like Harry's story. I never feel like Rowling takes me out of a scene with stilted language or wording that doesn't belong or changing the world she's created. I never get distracted when I read her books -- unlike many other modern authors. She has an old-fashioned, classic quality about her writing. She's completely invested in her story and nothing really breaks you out of any given scene. She understands suspense and mystery and leads you only as far as she wants to take you.

But I did have some issues. I thought some character subplots, like Percy's story or even Lily's back story, were written without much substance like a college student rushing to finish a paper they left till the last minute. Lily's story remained thin, to me. Her much ballyhooed eyes, well, you don't find out why they're so special after all that buildup. It turns out there's nothing magical about them.

Even though I was happy Percy's storyline was resolved, I thought it was too quick. I was happy that Rowling didn't see fit to kill him or make him pay for being young and foolish and that instead, he was welcomed back openly. That's what I hoped for and that's what I got -- but I wanted more. It was just ... too simple. There was no consequence.

Neville came in to his own, yes, but I wanted him to be far more heroic than he ended up being.

The search for the Deathly Hallows, seemed to me at first to be a distraction. Harry came to that conclusion too, at one point, and I found myself relieved that he picked another direction to go in. The search for the Hallows moved the story away from what I thought we'd learn about the founders and moved on to highlight Dumbledore's indiscretions. I liked that because it took you deeper into secrets and lies that formed Harry unknowingly. I didn't expect that. It wasn't until the end that I realized that it lead to explaining what happened the night Dumbledore was killed, and Voldemort's true quest -- and his incredible mistakes that lead to his downfall.

There were always "Dumbledore is evil" theories out there following the fourth book, and I always brushed them aside feeling that he was kindly, but had secrets he had to keep close to the chest that would eventually lead Harry to defeat Voldemort. And that's what happened, except I could never have expected to find out that DD was not only keeping secrets, but he was actually kind of a terrible person -- basically knowingly leading a child to slaughter for the greater good. Think of what Harry could have done and how many lives could have been spared had he known the whole truth.

Dumbledore's brother, Aberforth, seemingly only a comic anecdote through six books, turns out to have been the better man, the man Dumbledore should have been. Dumbledore is not only manipulative and secretive, he is vain and self-important -- even in death. And so we come to Snape. Dumbledore did something simliar to Snape, the only consolation was that Snape knew the full extent of what his job was and was able to take it on effectively and economically. He did it with all the information he needed even though Dumbledore ruthlessly manipulated Snape's own self-loathing to get him to do his bidding -- twisting Snape's love for Lily and his own lifelong regrets. Snape's storyline was hard to read because you couldn't get away from feeling his was a character to be pitied in the end. I wish Snape didn't have to die to for Harry to find out what kind of man he was. I thought it was a bit cheap that he had to find out through Snape's memories (I had hoped for a confrontation -- it could have been SO JUICY!), but it appeared it was the only way Rowling could find to tell the story of Harry's mother's history -- and for that matter, his Aunt Petunia's. Oh, and James pretty much remained kind of a schmuck.

Overall, I thought this book tied up neatly all the storylines of a rather unwieldy cast of characters. While, I'm not sure I can say I was completely satisfied with some character archs, I can say that I truly admire Rowling's bravery in writing from dealing with lies and deception to including a TON of morally ambiguity. Remember, folks, this is a children's book that is now dealing with mercy killing, killing for the greater good, and senseless lies, death and destruction. It didn't bother me, but I can see how this could upset some younger (and older readers). She doesn't shy away from taking her characters to some ugly conclusions. She takes what should be the epitome of good in Dumbledore and makes him almost eviler than the villain -- he just didn't kill people with his own hand -- no, he let others do it either knowingly or unknowingly. Yes, he sacrified himself, but his job wasn't finished. It had to be finished by others.

Rowling's need for treacly conclusions bothered me a little and so I found the last epilogue a bit too Disney for my taste. Harry survives to name one child Albus Severus Potter. (that's just too sugary for me, sorry). But Harry survives to become a man with a family and a life and that is a happy, good ending no matter how you slice it.