And why should we care about 'Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus?'

That's definitely Long Beach, oil islands and all.  I hope Deborah Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas can save us from the "Mega Shark and Giant Octopus!"

That's it, we're all jaded now.  See what you've done to us Hollywood?

The constant feed wagon of cookie-cutter films that are the same old same and cast with the usual suspects have driven us mad.  We're so crazy now that we'll celebrate almost anything that breaks from the norm.

Over the years a familiar style of filmmaking has emerged -- I like to call it cinema médiocre (pronounced all French and artsy). 

It's not as bad as it sounds. Unless you're one of the producers of these types of films then it sounds pretty bad.  Allow me to explain...

How much like a 'B' movie can you make your film look or sound like?  Can you make an action movie that channels the campy fun of "The Warriors?"  Can you cast several actors in roles that are blatantly stereotypical (angry police chief, hooker with a heart, dogged scientist determined to save us from Mothra)? Can you make the film (or HD video) you shot with look like it's been in the can since 1975 like the upcoming "Black Dynamite?"

And most important, can you get a few recognizable actors who don't take themselves too seriously?

Remember "Snakes on a Plane?"  I'll bet you do. Folks thought it was cool to see Samuel L. Jackson call snakes a bunch of mother%#@&&!  How many of us lined up to see any one of those "Saw" or "Hostel" movies?

I'm raising my hand. I paid money to see these movies on DVD or at the multiplex. 

Cinema médiocre is my description for films that don't shoot for the stars and don't mind underachieving a little bit if it makes you laugh or scream or... you get the picture.  

By now you've seen the trailer for "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus" starring Lorenzo Lamas and Deborah Gibson.  You probably squealed in delight at its so-bad-it's-gotta-be-intentional plot.  A GIANT shark and an even BIGGER octopus?  Who's good, who's bad... who cares?  I just want to see special effects that look like they were made on a Commodore 64.  I want to watch actors play it straight when they say lines like "we're dealing with a menace!"

So yes, I'll say it here and now; I'd rather see 'Mega Shark' on DVD twice than watch another romantic comedy on the big screen.  

Unless, of course, the wife drags me to another romantic comedy.  I'm still on the hook for making her watch "The Spirit."  

I suppose there are limits to the charms of cinema médiocre.