A former member of the West L.A. Moms Club (who moved to Texas) writes about picking up this book at the library and LOVING IT: "I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids'' By Trisha Ashworth and Amy NobileIn.

The spirit of the authors' love of "If you've ever" lists, here's one of my own. If you've ever:
* Served frozen waffles for dinner (doesn't that smidgen of whole grain count for something?)
* Stayed in your pajamas for the entire day (or two)
* Let your kids watch one more show because, after all, Noggin is "Like Preschool on TV"
* Ignored your nap-deprived child as he played with your cell phone because, frankly, a $50 phone call to China would be less painful than taking it away...

This may be the book for you. Peachheaders were recently asking for readign material -- looks like this one is a winner.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 8:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Taking care of yourself comes third, after taking care of your family and your house, in that order, according to a nationwide survey this month sponsored by cosmetics company Suave. Not exactly shocking news. But guess what came in 4th place? Taking care of your job!

That surprised me a little. Personally, my priorities are closer to 1. Family, 2. Work 3. Self.

Anyway, in the taking care of self department, the study found that 46% of moms have forgotten to brush their teeth in the morning and 58% have days when they didn’t have enough time to shower or bathe. Almost 70% say they have gone for weeks or months without a haircut, even though they needed one.

To celebrate/promote mothers spending time (and $) on themselves, Suave has organized a Moms spa day field trip at LuKaRo Salon in Beverly Hills this Monday, October 1. I think it's full, but you might try crashing it. Jenny McCarthy will be there -- and I probably will too!

Posted by Barbara Correa at 11:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

If you're like me, you occasionally sit in the car outside your house while the kid(s) finish their nap. Well, after reading this, I'm not going to recline my seat anymore when I do that.

Check out this article from Slate Magazine about the risks from a collision when the seat is tilted back:
Death Nap: The dangers of tilting back the front seat of your car -- don't do it!

An excerpt: "One of the main functions of kids' car seats (once they've reached the age of about 3) is to make sure that their seat belts hit them at the right height.'' Apparently, the same goes for us big people

Words to drive by.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 2:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hey breastfeeding moms, there's another event in the works. Lindsey Nelson and Lisa Carey, the mothers behind the recent nurse-in at Applebee's, are organizing the San Fernando Valley breastfeeding challenge, part of an international breastfeeding competition. (word is still out on what the winners get!)

The breastfeeding event will be this Saturday, September 29, at 10:30 am at Anthony C Beilenson Park at Lake Balboa in Van Nuys. It is sponsored by the Quintessence Foundation, a non-profit group providing education to parents and professionals about breastfeeding.

For more info: www.babyfriendly.ca

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hundreds of thousands more toys were recalled today in seven separate announcements from the Consumer Product Safety Commission, all related to lead paint. The new recalls include: Thomas and Friends wooden railway and Knights of the Sword toys made by RC2, Guidecraft puppet theaters and kids gardening tools sold at Target and Jo-Ann craft stores.

I bought some of these adorable little pink and green gardening rakes from Target months ago. I'm not crazy about the idea that they are covered with lead paint, but my kids barely touch them and it's hard to believe they could do any harm. It almost sounds easier to throw them out than haul them back to Target.

Here's a list of U.S.-made toys we ran when the recall story first broke:

NONPLASTIC TOYS
www.novanatural.com naturalplay.com/
www.peapods.com/
www.seasonsnaturaltoys.com/

AMERICAN-MADE TOYS
www.ShopForAmerica.com
www.ZebulonUSA.com
www.usmadetoys.com
www.unclegoosetoys.com
www.holgatetoy.com
www.maplelandmark.com

Posted by Barbara Correa at 9:44 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Patagonia, the Ventura-based maker of outdoor sports gear, wins the prize for best Southern Californian on-site child care and overall kid-friendly work environment. Patagonia kids trick or treat through the office and get read to by the company CEO.

See my story in today's paper for more from Moms about their working environment.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 1:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hey breastfeeding moms, there's another event in the works. Lindsey Nelson and Lisa Carey, the mothers behind the recent nurse-in at Applebee's, are organizing the San Fernando Valley breastfeeding challenge, part of an international breastfeeding competition. (word is still out on what the winners get!)

The breastfeeding event will be this Saturday, September 29, at 10:30 am at Anthony C Beilenson Park at Lake Balboa in Van Nuys. It is sponsored by the Quintessence Foundation, a non-profit group providing education to parents and professionals about breastfeeding.

For more info: www.babyfriendly.ca

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I spoke to two different working Moms today who both were complaining that Los Angeles, while it may be considered progressive in general, leaves parents in the lurch in several ways. Most important, the schools are a mess. I'm not just talking about LAUSD. Preschools have one year waiting lists. Child care centers are ridiculously expensive and also frequently have waiting lists, and apparently very difficult to open.

And, I'm sorry, but the level of concentration, research, and patience it requires to get your kid into a decent public school is probably worth tens of thousands of hours that could have been spent working - or doing something fun with the kids!

The other thing that came up: a serious lack of kid activities at hours for working parents. All the Mommy and Me's are during the day, so are lessons of any kind etc. One Mom I spoke to today just wants to be able to meet other parents one night a week to discuss parenting issues. Anyone know of such a group?

Posted by Barbara Correa at 5:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Many have on-site daycare. Some allow up to two months paid maternity AND paternity leave. They have lactation "programs,'' and flextime. They are the top 100 companies for working Moms, according to Working Mother Magazine's annual list, released today.

Most of the California companies in the top 100 are high-tech Silicon Valley firms, but a few Socal employers made the list: Ventura-based Patagonia and Scripps Health in San Diego, which each have on-site, discounted childcare, the Holy Grail of parent-friendly benefits.

Working Mother has taken some criticism in the past for its list because lots of the companies still fall short of what working moms really want to see (for instance, I noticed that more than a quarter of the 100 still don't offer maternity leave beyond the federal mandate). But more on that later -- look for my story in tomorrow's paper.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 9:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Why didn't I think of this? No, I'm not advocating shopping in red lingerie. But I just love the idea behind this image: a shopping bag can be reusable AND biodegradable. This bag apparently doubles as a bra, and is a whole lot more fun than the crunchy fabric satchels most grocery stores sell. I wonder if Ikea could make its signature yellow and blue bag into an undergarment as attractive as this?

But seriously, this is important. By this time, everyone living anywhere near a Trader Joe's has received the message that it just isn't cool to walk out with groceries in plastic bags. Now, if I could just remember to bring the big stylish bag my husband keeps in the back of the car for just this purpose. Everytime I find myself in T.J.s though, I have once again forgotten to carry my eco friendly sack, and I get stared at walking out with bags and bags of pollution-spewing plastic.

Of course, the place I go the most, Target, seems to have slipped under the radar on this one. They have those bland red bags now, but they don't seem to push them too hard. The checkers always opt for plastic without being prompted.

What's your favorite shopping bag these days? Are you still doing paper or plastic? Seen any unusual reusables out there?

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:55 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

As Peachhead's Linda Perry e-mailed earlier, this weekend wraps up Spa Week and many spas are offering special $50 treatments.

Example, LeSpa at Sofitel (across from Beverly Center) has a 50-minute Radiate Freshness Facial for all skin types on special for $95, originally: $125.

I'm still dying to try a chocolate treatment, like they do at the Gauthier Total Image Spa in Sherman Oaks. Mmmm. Don't know if they are participating.

Chill Out L.A. has a list of participating spas, so what are you waiting for? Of course you deserve it!!!

Posted by Barbara Correa at 4:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So, I got a bit more information that gives me some confidence that there's no need to panic every time Mattel, or the California Public Health Department, issues a new recall. I spoke to the department this morning, and they said some bad lunch bags were almost certainly distributed at some LAUSD schools given the size of the district. And the lead levels in those bags was pretty high.

On the other hand, I spoke to The Tin Box Co., which makes Disney's lunch boxes and supplies Walmart and Target. Lloyd Roth, president of the company, says his ink from China and Japan has always been tested, and the stores that buy this stuff also test them, and the lead levels are way below U.S. government standards.

He also said that since Mattel started making all this noise about possible problems with lead, Tin Box has added yet another layer of testing to its own process: during the last month or so, the company, based in Farmingdale, New York, has been sending out samples of its finished products to a lab in Manhattan before they go to market for one more independent test, and he's been happy with the results.

"We send it to a lab and they scrape [the ink] off,'' he said. "We don’t want people to feel uncomfortable.''
Since the company has been making tins with cookies or candy or some other kind of food inside for 50 years, it has always done a lot of testing -- its part of the way they do business. So go right ahead -- pack the kid's lunch in a Tin Box Co. lunch box. I'd hold off on anything government issued, though.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 2:53 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I am not prone to paranoia when it comes to recalls. When Mattel started announcing it was calling in toys with lead, I did not immediately go through my kids closets. But today's news that something like 56,000 lunch bags tainted with lead are being recalled really hits us Moms in the gut. This time, it's not just about keeping plastics out of the mouths of toddlers. The idea that a wholesome sandwich I take the time to fix could sit in my daughter's lunch box all day and absorb lead makes me sick.

The lead bags were passed out at school health fairs in California as part of an effort to promote healthy eating. They are blue and green canvas bags with logos that say: EAT FRUITS & VEGETABLES AND BE ACTIVE in English and Spanish.

Let me get personal. My husband returned from Toronto last week toting two adorable Disney Princess lunch boxes, which he paid an arm and leg for due to the weakness of the dollar against Canadian currency. My daughters LOVE them and have started taking them to school. The boxes, made in China by The TIn Box Co., came with little stickers on the bottom saying "Lead-free tested.''

But now I'm highly suspicious. Even if they claim they've been tested, how do you know? I have a call in to the TIn Box Co., and I'll update what I find out. The point is, these recalled bags look the same as most canvas lunch bags I've seen. So I'd say it's highly likely that most of these bags contain some lead.
I think I'm going to go back to my brown bags. The kids can use the lunch boxes for play. I guess the lesson here is you've got to choose what to get worried about. I mean, Croc-style sandals may get stuck in escalators, but at least they don't contain lead (at least that we know of). And what about the toxic soup of smog we all breathe in, living in the 310, 909 and 818?

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:15 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Now that we're a few weeks into back to school, it's time to start thinking about where the kids will be going next year. Luckily, we've got tons of resources.

One of the most entertaining -- and useful -- focuses on navigating the confusing Los Angeles Unified School District. It's NPR Diva Sandra Tsing Loh's "Scandalously Informal Guide to Los Angeles Schools'' This guide actually makes it fun to bone up on crucial knowledge, with sections titled Why L.A.’s middle class English speakers tend to move to Portland and How the LAUSD is like Costco -- you get the idea.

For preschools, there are people who will help you narrow down your options, if you're willing to spend a few hundred bucks. See my article from last month from L.A. School Mates' Web site. And send in other tips you might have. Here are a few more basics I've picked up in talking to parents and consultants:

Don't rely exclusively on other parents' recommendations. It's great to go on Peachhead and get a few reviews of schools you're interested in. But you still need to go visit yourself because parents see things differently, and each kid has different needs.

Early bird .... I can't stress enough that completing school applications and tours early is probably the most crucial part of getting into your school of choice. This is L.A. You're competing against gazillions of other people for those spots.

Relax. As each of the consultants I talked to said, not getting into the right school is a minor problem compared to the stress you will put on your child and yourself if you take all this too seriously. If you don't get into your top choice, you probably will next time around.

Don't forget to send in your comments/experiences!

Posted by Barbara Correa at 8:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Thinking Inside the Box

In my neighborhood growing up, we stuck a big empty cardboard box on top of the red wagon and played pioneers. I remember spending hours inside, decorating it and making a little home. It fell over a few times, but I don't recall any painful injuries - just hours of imagination and fun.

The good ol' cardboard box has finally earned the respect it deserves. The box was inducted last week into the National Toy Hall of Fame alongside Barbie, Silly Putty and Tinker Toys as a one of the 30-odd most iconic toys ever created.

Part of its beauty, I think, is that there are no feelings of guilt when the kids finally tire of the box, and it can be put out with the trash (in the blue recycle bin, of course.)

My own kids' room is strewn with forgotten detritus from birthdays and toy store trips past, facing a better future on The Island of Misfit Toys. But for some reason, there's always a pang of guilt in tossing out that soiled Hello Kitty compact I was so impressed by when it came in the Happy Meal.

The cardboard box can't really be recalled -- it's biodegradable (I think), without sharp edges, and usually comes free, on the outside of the $39.99 toy-toy you secretly thought was the last one you'd ever have to buy.

Here's a list of more low-tech, high-fun toys from Parentdish.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 6:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Working Moms I talk to are always trying to squeeze in more time at home, while the stay at homers are always looking for new ways to make a little cash. One nice way to do that if you have the time is by participating in focus groups.

Here's an example from Jen Levinson's list today: Harriet at Trotta and Associates is looking for a few moms with kids between 2-4 to participate in a study on beverages (if you purchase juice boxes, this is perfect for you).

The groups usually take less than an afternoon, and typically pay $100-$200. Easy money, and it's a real activity for the kiddies (multitasking in action!).

Anyone can go to these marketing groups' Web sites, fill out a profile, and then get on their list of go-to Moms. And as any marketer will tell you, Moms are responsible for making the bulk of spending decisions in most households. Advertisers have finally discovered this, so as a Mom, you are highly sought after for your opinions about what you buy.

Here are a few more resources for those interested in focus groups:
Craigslist lists tons of focus groups (under event gigs)
Paid Surveys

Posted by Barbara Correa at 9:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Living in L.A., land of the $700 Peg Perego stroller and the $80 Ralph Lauren toddler separates, it's hard to imagine how little so many of the world's mothers have. Even if you live near the poverty line here, you can still probably afford an umbrella stroller from Target, you have running water and a way to cook food.

Not so in places like Darfur. A web site called Mothers Fighting for Others brings to life the gaping need of basic equipment to keep a family going. Today they are asking for $30 donations to buy solar cookers for women so they don't have to leave the safety of the refugee camps to go and look for firewood. Yesterday they were collecting underwear, which is apparently too expensive in Kenya for women to buy.

The site also has links to other important child-related sites, like Stop Child Slavery. These things are hard to contemplate, especially from where we sit. Believe me, I'm the first to say that worrying about third-world hunger isn't much fun compared to helping your kids decide on whether to be Ariel or Sleeping Beauty for Halloween.

But as mothers we are part of a global effort to protect our children, and the only way to improve things is to use the power that's in our numbers.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

What's in your wallet?
A whopping 47 percent of U.S. parents can't afford to put their kids through college, according to results of a poll released today by consumer finance site Bankrate. Of the more than 1,000 parents surveyed, eighty six percent of parents expect their children to go to college, and about 40 percent said they'd get a second job to help make it happen.

I must admit, we have blown off college savings for the moment because we're too busy scrambling to pay rent in 2007 Los Angeles (need I say more). I guess that can't be an excuse forever, but I suspect a lot of parents in this area are struggling enough with retirement savings, let alone squirreling money away for higher education.

Bankrate's advice? Work the scholarship system and try to get a free ride.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 4:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Look, she's just like us!
Ok, she's not exactly Betty Crocker down the street. But with Jodie Foster all over the news promoting her new movie, "The Brave One'' it got me thinking about her motherhood (Sorry, Jodie, since you're so famous we get to deconstruct your life).

Before I go there, though, what about the success of that film? I guess women don't necessarily have a problem with violence if there's a reason for it.

Anyway, back to Jodie as Mom. Over the last ten years or so, she seemed to be putting her career in the back seat to raise her two school-age sons, Charles and Kit. I remember reading that and thinking how rare it was for a star that big to opt to "work at home'' while her kids were little.

Foster has never revealed the paternity of her kids. She's been with the same partner, producer Cydney Bernard, for years. All sounds peachy keen. But what does she tell her kids when they start asking about Dad, who he is, and why he's not there? What would you do?

Posted by Barbara Correa at 3:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

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I often think that if I could be anyone, I would choose to be Diana Krall. She's a glamorous torch singer and a wicked pianist, and it must be pretty interesting to be married to Elvis Costello. So when I found out we had something in common, I was quite excited.

Here's how it happened: we went to see Diana at the Hollywood Bowl a month ago. Mind you, it was my first time seeing her in concert. But she just seemed a little off - not her music, but her banter. She kept on repeating the names of the band and saying how great it was to be there and how tired she was - it was almost like she was on something, or maybe she is just eccentric, I thought. About midway through the show she finally paused and started to really talk to the audience and then she dropped the bombshell, which was news to me: she gave birth to twin boys last December!

A ha, suddenly everything was so clear. Her symptoms fit exactly with the Multiple Mom syndrome -- extreme fatigue, ability to concentrate if pressed, but generally hazy, and always apologetic. Very familiar. Go Diana!

Posted by Barbara Correa at 11:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Everybody - whether they have breasts and babies or not - seems to have an opinion about whether it's OK to breastfeed in public (for the record, Disneyland is definitely pro-breast baring. But it seems some of its employees never got that memo). My story last week about a nurse-in at Applebee's generated some heat between public display advocates and those who find it tasteless.

I consider myself neutral on this topic by the way - I absolutely assumed I would breastfeed my twins, but in the end failed to do it, and was OK with that too.

What came as a shock was the voicemail messages I got reacting to the story. I received several calls from, ahem, "older'' women who had breastfed decades ago. Not only were they not supportive of the nurse-in concept, they all said nursing women should just stay at home. That way, they can nurse freely without anyone copping a look. One friend who nursed her son said she agrees - it's pretty simple to "cover up'' and do it subtly, and really no need to become an exhibitionist (yes, some think of it that way).

But I see the other side too. That poor Mom at Applebee's in what must have been a sweltering Kentucky day didn't have a sweatshirt or blanket to cover with, so she got hassled. The woman has like five kids -- she deserves a break for that alone.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 8:45 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Is it me, or have museums, theaters and parks finally realized that their only hope of getting busy L.A. parents out to spend some money on the weekend is if they make things super kid friendly? A quick glance this morning at GoCityKids' event listings revealed a dizzying cornocopia of things to do - and that was just for events today.

There's a faery hunt in Franklin Canyon, a bunch of movies (I love Jungle Book) and a family smoothie-making session at The Huntington Library. Barbie will make an appearance at the L.A. Zoo to promote her new movie (she has to stay competitive with her archrivals, the Bratz), and kids can win Mattel toys (what else are they going to do with all those recalled plastics?)

Of course, I probably won't actually go to any of these things. I'll be lucky if I make it to the 99 cents only store to buy a bottle brush. But just reading about all this culture makes me feel like I'm participating!

Posted by Barbara Correa at 1:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Yes, it's fun. Sure, it's fulfilling. But it's also bloody challenging, and we all need to laugh and commiserate about it now and again. I want to devote this space to the amazing Mother Jugglers, who are endlessly fascinating for their ability to do so many different things at once, without losing their minds. (At least not losing their minds on a permanent basis). It seems like every mother I meet, even if she's not going off to an office every morning, is doing something on the side. I think of these Moms as the most creative microentrepreneurs, each one the CEO of their own little family operation. I'm one of these Moms, trying my darndest to hold down a job and mind the kiddies too -- all while being reasonably nice to my husband. I know how I do it, but I love hearing how all the other jugglers do it too. I really want to hear from all of you about whatever is going on in your life. Just be advised that it may turn into a story for the real paper! I encourage you to bookmark this page, email friends and contacts about it and help us build a community of online idea sharers. After all, we're all in this together.

Posted by Barbara Correa at 10:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)