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January 28, 2008

Check your Babysitter

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I don't know about you, but I have failed so far to find a free, or at least cheap, way to do background checks on potential babysitters. I have even asked for several sitters' addresses and driver's license numbers (I think asking for a social number is a little much). But I haven't had much success getting anywhere with that info.

There are tons of Web sites that will run security checks on people, but most of them seem to cost around $49. Here's one recommended by a subscriber to Jen Levinson's list: www.childcarecheck.com.

January 10, 2008

OUCH: $22 an Hour for Babysitter

babysitter.jpgI don’t know about you, but I ended up paying a jacked up $22 an hour for a New Year’s Eve babysitter because my husband announced at 4 pm that evening that a colleague was throwing a party that we just had to attend. The rate was through an agency I use only when I’m desperate. The sitters are always professional and wonderful, but it burns me to pay such crazy prices to someone to sit in my living room watching television. What’s the most/least you’ve ever paid for a babysitter? What do you consider a reasonable rate?

VOTE IN OUR POLL:

Drop-In Daycare L.A. ... and more

kids.jpgMy MOMSPACE column, based on this blog, runs every Thursday in the Los Angeles Daily News. I spend my week perusing the Web for weird, useful, fun trends in parenting, so check here every week for tidbits you won't find anywhere else. And let me know what you like or didn't like, at barbara.correa@dailynews.com.

DROP-IN DAYCARE: It's a working parents' greatest dilemma: the preschool is closed; your babysitter is sick; your neighbor is at work, where you are due in less than an hour. What to do? A company called Bright Horizons (www.brighthorizons.com) runs child care centers that will take drop-in kids if they have space. There are just three locations in greater L.A., and the hours, availability and price vary. See details at www.insidesocal.com/momspace/

ONLY IN L.A.: Being bilingual is all the rage in multicultural Los Angeles. You see it in elementary school immersion programs and parks & recreation classes, and now bilingualism is becoming part of everyday life, from Kindermusik classes to playgroups. My local Moms club just sent around an Evite for a bilingual playgroup for toddlers speaking English and Spanish, and the California Association for Bilingual Education has started parent workshops. Habla Espanol? It’s time to learn! www.bilingualeducation.org.

BABYSITTER RATE POLL: I don’t know about you, but I ended up paying a jacked up $22 an hour for a New Year’s Eve babysitter because my husband announced at 4 pm that evening that a colleague was throwing a party that we just had to attend. The rate was through an agency I use only when I’m desperate. The sitters are always professional and wonderful, but it burns me to pay such crazy prices to someone to sit in my living room watching television. What’s the most/least you’ve ever paid for a babysitter? What do you consider a reasonable rate? Participate in our poll at www.insidesocal.com/momspace/

FED UP: Two Angry Moms is a documentary by two Connecticut mothers “fed up’’ with the low quality of school cafeteria food. They take a video camera to school to record students consuming neon green slushies, greasy fries and supersize cookies, and calling it lunch. The film has been making the rounds at community theaters since last spring in an effort to start a movement toward healthier school food. See clips of the film and more info at: www.angrymoms.org

SURVIVING TWEENS: Oh pre-teen and teenaged girls. The tortured soul, the raw emotion, the unbelievable sensitivity of young girls. I figure we have a good ten years until we'll be confronted with all this as parents, and I joke that my husband will be so old by then that a lot of the drama won't register. Still, it's never too early to prepare.
The current January/February issue of Daughters magazine focuses on nurturing the parent-daughter relationship during the angst-ridden tween years. Highlights include “girl-led’’ conflict resolution, getting an inactive girl moving, and eating disorder 911. (www.daughters.com)

For more on work, family and parenting in L.A., go to www.insidesocal.com/momspace/

December 13, 2007

Wanted: Mormon nannies

Being Mormon may not be the greatest thing for a Presidential candidate. But when it comes to nannies, belonging to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is a plus.

“All of our nannies have to have a strong moral character,’’ says Kari Shafer, non-Mormon owner of Your Child’s Nanny, a placement agency that pairs families with Mormon caregivers. “All the LDS nannies have to have a recommendation from their bishop and they are strict about who they recommend.’’
Shafer said 90 percent of the demand for LDS nannies comes from non-Mormon families. In the year since she bought the business, she’s noticed that although the company places all sorts of caregivers, the LDS branch is responsible for increasing hits on the Web site.

See http://yourchildsnanny.com/

December 7, 2007

Nanny Cam shows abuse

Ouch. This nanny got caught on tape getting abusive when one of her two-year-old twin charges resisted going down for her nap. Angry dad Brad Roth started NannyAbuse.com to create a forum for parents to get more information.

Watch this clip from NBC: http://video.knbc.com/player/?id=192803

Here are two other inventive nannywatch sites that I've written about:
LAnannywatch.blogspot.com
ISawYourNanny.blogspot.com
See my story from a month ago:

By Barbara Correa

Nasty nannies beware. Parents everywhere are watching you.

Whether on message boards, Web sites or blogs, the Internet is abuzz with reported sightings of rogue nannies slapping kids, leaving them unattended or worse.

Now, nervous moms and dads are finding total strangers out there willing to watch their backs and report any nanny abuse. And what some are reporting is fueling new concerns about the largely unregulated industry.

On LAnannywatch.blogspot.com, launched a year ago, a mother describes how she discovered that her nanny was dropping her infant twins off at a private house every day, paying another woman to watch them, and then pocketing the difference.

The nanny would then go to work at other families' homes or run errands.

The mother, who spoke on condition of anonymity because she is pursuing legal action against the nanny, said she checked references and did a background check on the nanny, who seemed legitimate.

She said she suspected nothing until someone in the neighborhood told her what was going on. The nanny was fired, but the mother said she posted a message on the blog to warn other parents about the scam.

After a rash of news reports showed secret videotapes of nannies slapping or beating children in the 1990s, some families took to installing hidden nanny cams.

But with the evolution of the Internet and the ability to post and blog in real time, citizen "nannywatch" sites have boomed.
Smacked on street

A recent thread on Peachhead, the huge Yahoo group for parents in Los Angeles, details the saga of a little girl named "Holland" who was seen being smacked on the street by her hired guardian.

On Oct. 30, one Peachheader -- as the site's members are known -- posted a description of a 3-year-old on Ventura Boulevard and Laurel Canyon Boulevard holding a lunch box with "Holland" written on it. The nanny was allegedly screaming at the girl and hitting her on the top of the head.

A few hours after the first post went up, mothers swarmed into action, calling local preschools to ask whether anyone had a girl named Holland in their class.

By the next morning, a message went out announcing that the child had been identified and that the parents were handling the situation.

"I couldn't get it out of my mind," said Priscilla Sanchez, an infant nurse in Encino and one of the mothers who started calling schools when she read about the bad nanny.

"It reconfirms why I don't use a nanny," said Jessica Gottlieb, a mother of two in Sherman Oaks.

Gottlieb is is a frequent visitor to ISawYourNanny.blogspot.com, a watchdog site that allows anyone with a computer to post a performance report on a caregiver.

Child left alone

One report filed on the site over the summer assails a grandmotherly caregiver who left a 2-year-old girl alone at the Sherman Oaks Fashion Square food court while she went to Panda Express "to get a bowl of chow mein."

"Why I didn't give the woman a tongue lashing, I don't know," the poster wrote. "Maybe it was because she had an accent and I wasn't sure she'd understand.

"Point of the story: Don't leave your child alone in a mall. ... This carelessness could have cost the child her life."

Gottlieb said one reason for the increase in nannywatch sites is that parents are not being selective enough when they hire. They're also learning the hard way that you get what you pay for.

"My kids go to an expensive private school," Gottlieb said. "The nannies I see there are not going to be up on that Web site."

Unfortunately, a lot of working families are looking for deep discounts on nannies.

Employing a nanny was once reserved for the rich and famous. But today, it's unusual to find a dual-income L.A. family with little children that doesn't use one.

Pat Cascio, president of the International Nanny Association, said that when she started her Houston nanny agency in 1983, there were only about 20 such businesses nationwide. Now there are thousands.

Registry virtually unknown

In 1987, California created a voluntary background-check registry called Trust Line, a database that lists in-home child-care providers who have no criminal convictions or child-abuse reports.

But the registry is virtually unknown among parents, and it only checks for certain crimes committed in California, said Cascio.

Professional nannies working on the tax rolls say that while the sites and blogs might hurt the industry overall, they also make good nannies look even better.

"The majority of what I'm reading (on ISawYourNanny.blogspot.com) is illegal immigrants. It's a little disappointing -- you have a lot of people who are ... trying to get the best deal in terms of pay," said nanny Amanda Casabianca.

Casabianca said her $18- to $19-per-hour salary puts her among the highest-paid nannies in the business.

She said an abundance of people willing to work for low pay allows more working people to employ nannies, but it also hurts quality.

"There's so many nannies," she said, "and no regulation, no licensing."

barbara.correa@dailynews.com

November 27, 2007

Tug of War Over Family Leave

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My friend H. is a single working mother who has a daughter with a serious medical condition. The only way she can handle her child’s lengthy doctor visits is to use her federally-mandated 12 weeks of unpaid leave in spurts, instead of in a single stretch. But she's worried because her employer isn't thrilled with the arrangement. She says they'd rather have her schedule a leave in one solid block planned well in advance. As we all know, however, that's not how it goes when you've got an ill child or parent to take care of. What parents need from the Family & Medical Leave Act is flexibility, which is one thiing most companies hate.

Right after H. told me about her situation, I read an article in the Wall Street Journal (soon to be free online) about the tug of war being played out between HR departments and working parents all over the country. According to the article, the Labor Department asked for comments on the FMLA last year and was flooded with responses and is considering defining the law more specifically.

In the meantime, some companies are goiing to extreme lengths to check up on employees claiming the leave. One firm, Matrix, even advertises spying services on its Web site to catch workers using family medical leave fraudulently.

For more information and eligibility requirements for FMLA, see the Labor Department site.

November 17, 2007

Nanny hiring guide

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Need nanny help? This was compiled from a Mom on Jen Levinson's e-mail list. It has a great ten-item checklist for screening a nanny candidate and web sites where you can download applications.


PLEASE email MELISOPP@yahoo.com your tips and your stories to add to the tip sheet Here are downloadable application forms for those who don't have a prepared resume:
http://acaringnanny.com/NannyApplication/index.shtml
http://www.nanniesplus.com/apps/EasyNannyApp.shtml
http://familyextensions.com/application/submit.asp

Signs of a bad nanny: late for work, makes excuses for many things, does not get on your childs level i.e. sits on the couch while your child plays, often seems to be working in the area near where you walk into the house (because she was resting all day then jumps up when she hears you come home), never surprises you by doing anything extra, has poor judgement (gives your baby keys to play with, puts baby up high on counter to change them or feed them, leaves child alone in room where she cant see them, has them in swing all day, plops them in front of TV, is messy, keeps baby in diaper after nap, does not wipe babys face well after eating, swings kids by arm, says bad words in front of kids "crap" "shit", goes shopping when you think they are at the park, meets friends for lunch instead of working and neglects kid, laughs when your child is hurt, pinches your child, you ask her to clean and it still seems dirty, forgetful about many things, etc.)

Continue reading "Nanny hiring guide " »

October 18, 2007

So, You Think You Know Your Nanny?

062707nanny.jpgAs if finding a nanny in Los Angeles wasn't challenging enough. Now, parents have to worry that their nanny might show up on isawyournanny.com, a Web site where people post information -- mostly negative -- about observing what they consider bad nanny behavior.

New York postings dominate the site, but local reports are beginning to grow. Here's one from the summer, apparently written about a grandma!:
Sherman Oaks Fashion Square in Los Angeles, CA
Thursday (6/21) evening at Sherman Oaks Fashion Square food court, your child's' grandmother or caretaker (although she seemed like a grandmother) left your child alone while getting her food. She brought your daughter over to a set of tables two away from where I was sitting, put down a tray that had an iceberg type salad along with a drink, then went over to Panda Express to get a bowl of chow mein.

Your daughter, approximately 2 year old judging by her size. Very well behaved, named Hillary, wearing a cute striped sundress with pink, lime green, and purple ribbons around the rib cage area. She had light brown hair. Grandma was wearing a brown nondescript dress and had brown hair also. She came back with the chow mein and told Hillary what a good girl she was and that she would take her on "rides" after they finished eating.

To be honest, had there been any sort of security or management in the area, I would have alerted them. Why I didn't give the woman a tongue lashing, I don't know. Maybe it was because she had an accent and I wasn't sure she'd understand. Point of the story, don't leave your child alone in a mall. Get a stroller, hold her hand, or go home and eat dinner. This carelessness could have cost the child her life.

October 4, 2007

Do You Know Your Nanny?

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Do you really know your nanny? It's every parent's nightmare -- the idea that your wonderful nanny pulls a Jeckel and Hyde when you're not around. How can you know what goes on unless you are there? Some Moms have resorted to nanny cams and such, but a great web site I stumbled on takes the nanny watch concept a step further.

At I Saw Your Nanny, citizen nanny watchers post detailed descriptions of both positive and negative interaction between children and caregiver. There are also a few rants from nannies themselves. One complains about incometent placement agencies; another au pair in Manhattan claims her family is starving her. That one is accompanied by pictures of refrigerator contents marked with yellow stickies saying 'do not eat.'

Look for a full article on this soon.

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