HELLO!!! Let 'er Rip!!!

When I saw confetti-tossing Rip Taylor at the Hollywood Christmas Parade on Sunday, all I wanted to do was talk about the silly show he used to do called "$1.98 Beauty Pageant." It was really awful but I thought he was hysterical in it.

But Rip just wanted to tell jokes. And throw confetti, of course.

"The hair's on too tight," he said, adjusting his toupee. "It's a new one. HELLO!...These roots are dead...[the toupee] looks like the hind leg of a dog. I go by a tree and the whole left side goes up in the air!"

"I'm having the KFC chicken, it's the Hillary Clinton. Two small breasts and a left wing. HELLO!"

I ask Rip what brings him back to the parade each year. "Cash!" he jokes. "It's fun . The kids scream at me and I yell back, the little bastards. They know me from 'Zach and Cody' and from 'Jackass.' New audience. I'm still there, still working. I'm doing a one-man play next called 'It Ain't All Confetti.'"