Outlaw on the roof

So there's this critter -- it sounds big, I think it's a raccoon -- that's been traipsing across my flat roof now for over a week, keeping me up half the night. Vigilant, I have taken to following his path, shadowing from below his pre-dawn wanderings across my housetop. During peak moments of frustration, I have been known to bang the broom handle -- BAM BAM BAM -- on the ceiling. "Go Away!" I shout. 

These episodes make me look dangerously disturbed, I realize. My two sheepdogs, who are utterly unfazed by the house guest, have taken to shunning me during the increasingly frequent late-night outbursts, quietly migrating toward the back of the house where they can get some sleep.  

I think the raccoon may even have managed to make his way inside a small crawl space right above my bedroom closet ceiling. The overhead sounds have become way too close in that part of the house. And when I heard tiny bits of plaster actually falling onto the closet floor like pebbles the other night, I exited without delay, pulling blankets and pillow onto the living room couch.

Now raccoons are just as cute as they can be. But I know enough about them to realize they can be (a) feisty and (b) very destructive to roofs. Oh, and this is also litter season.

Yikes.

I am awaiting call backs from some humane trappers-for-hire in Long Beach who say they can help relocate the animal(s) and do followup repairs (good-bye tax rebate check). But in the meantime, I decided to educate myself (and now you) on how to protect my property from these "urban bandits" in the future.

Some of this has probably been my own fault -- like neglecting to trim the huge tree that now towers above my roofline for a few years now. I can hear the creature scaling it during his comings and goings (a tree-trimming appointment has been made).

Other precautions: Don't leave any kind of pet food or water bowls outside. Close up the doggie door at night. And install a protective screen/cap on the top of the chimney. That's my next order of business, lest Rocky Raccoon come tumbling forth one of these nights right into our living room (which, of course, would absolutely thrill and entertain my dogs to no end -- Woo-hoo! Finally, something to herd!).

Raccoons are nocturnal creatures that feed on fruit, poultry, lawn grubs, garbage -- and they especially like koi fish swimming in those ponds that are so popular with homeowners in my neighborhood. So you can see how urban areas are a big attraction for these masked marauders.

And they aren't the only pesky creatures urban dwellers have to beware of -- there also are skunks, opossums and other wildlife that proliferate this time of year. 

So here are some good general tips about how to prevent wild animals from coming into your yard.

And raccoon advice specifically is offered by both the city of Los Angeles and the county.