As good as the Oscar nominees may be, could they have been even better had the characters from the sundry films bumped into one another?
Hustle and Flow? and Crash:?
Cameron: That last awards ceremony may not have worked out so well for us, but Im feeling really good about tonight! I think Date My Mom? has the inside track for the Best Reality Series Emmy!
Christine: And the helicopter footage of the last time I tried to escape from LAPD in a car chase is up for a local Emmy, which got me my SAG card!
DJay: Hey, hey, sorry to interrupt, but Im in town trying to launch my new single, and in the meantime, I need to make me some money. What about you, young lady you wanna work for me? Youre so fine Ill give you a special deal we split everything 60/40.
Cameron: Thats my wife, you lowlife.
DJay: Whoa take a look at you! You almost as handsome as me!
Cameron: Why, youre practically my doppelganger!
DJay: Not only that, you practically my lookalike!
Cameron: You might be family Ill put you on the payroll at my production company.
DJay: Its all pimpin.
Brokeback Mountains? Ennis and Jack visit the Los Angeles of Crash? and bump into Transamericas? Bree as a bonus:
Jack (on Santa Monica Blvd.): When they said there were hills and canyons here, I expected something different.
Ennis: No sheep to herd, either, cept for all those people we saw amblin round talkin on them teeny little phones.
Officer Ryan: So, what do we have here? Well, well: a couple of midnight cowboys.
Jack: We just wanted to do a little fishing together.
Officer Ryan: Fishing for what, eh? I should warn you: Like everyone else in Los Angeles, Im just an unbridled cauldron of seething hatred for anything different from myself, so Im going to have to do something unspeakable to you guys.
(Officer Ryan proceeds to do something unspeakable.)
Ennis (philosophically): If you cant fix it, you gotta stand it.
Bree: Toby? Is that you? Ive been searching for my reprobate son officer, what are you doing to them?
Officer Ryan (taking in Bree): Oh, God, it just keeps getting worse Id pray for an apocalyptic storm of frogs to cleanse this city, but that movie didnt come out this year.
Capote? is wished Good Night, and Good Luck.:?
Edward R. Murrow (on his celebrity-interview show): Now that youve taken the literary world by storm, will there be a Mrs. Capote soon?
Truman Capote: Silly boy.. Id like another Mr. Capote, though.
Edward R. Murrow: Ohhh
Truman Capote: Now Eddie, you yourself said we will not walk in fear of one another
Syriana? and The Constant Gardener? erupt in an orgy of conspiracy theories:
Tessa Quayle: My research has revealed that in order to facilitate the movement of oil from the Middle East to America, youve had a pipeline built under the Red Sea connecting Saudi Arabia to the Sudan to avoid attacks from Islamic extemists, and when Africans learned of it and threatened to protest, you inoculated them with fatal tuberculosis vaccines. Right?
Bob Barnes: Yeah. Kind of amazing Oliver Stone wasnt involved with either of our movies, isnt it?
Tessa Quayle: My only other question is, why would a couple of thinking-persons sex symbols expend all their energy getting involved with such nonsense? Shouldnt we just be making out?
Walk the Lines? Johnny Cash hires Jack and Ennis as back-up singers:
Johnny Cash: You good ole boys have the look so raw, so honest.
Jack: You have a real good fashion sense yourself, Mr. Cash. The all-black thing really works for you.
Johnny Cash: Well said, young fella. Now, boys, all you have to remember is hit your marks and keep away from my autoharp player that one is mine, all mine.
Ennis: That shouldnt be a problem, sir.
Johnny Cash: Great. Want some pills?
Edward R. Murrow uncovers the Munich? plot:
Murrow: Werent you paying attention when I came out with that whole We will not walk in fear of one another? thing?
Avner: Yes, Mr. Murrow. You cant imagine the devastating emotional scars my assignment has seared upon my soul.
Murrow: Save it for Oprah,? pal. McCarthy was behind this, wasnt he? Or was it the contemporary figures for which our respective movies used our tales as metaphors?
Capote? visits Brokeback Mountain:?
Oh, please, I think we all know where this one is going.