It's Awards Season, When They Take the Fun Out of Movies

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I'm not trying to do any populist pandering here. Really, check it out: at least eight of the titles on my top 10 movie list for 2006 are what "Good Morning, America" or your skateboarding nephew or Richard Roeper would probably label too highbrow.
You could even say that "Casino Royale" is actually a literate literary adaptation (in Bond movie terms, anyway). And "Apocalypto" is all subtitled, for the Jaguar God's sake, and was no one's idea of a mass market blockbuster despite being the coolest action movie of the year.
So I'll stand by my snooty critic bona fides, thank you. That established, I've gotta say, seeing the top 10 lists and awards season winners that are growing like campus ivy all over Internet movie fan sites, it looks to me like the very quality which the vast majority of films aspire to achieve, entertainment, is one of the last factors we use in judging a film's worthiness anymore.
Except for "Dreamgirls" and "The Departed," perhaps the two closest things to front runners in this year's still-coagulating best picture Oscar race, the movies deemed best by year-end tastemakers want to instruct us about history and how we don't treat one another as ideally as we should and that war is bad. All noble subjects, and I liked a lot of the films that addressed them.
But what's wrong with lightening up a little? Even the D-titles have snob appeal: "Departed" was directed by our Greatest Living Filmmaker and "Dreamgirls" boasts the highest of Broadway pedigrees. Were there no straight-ahead popular entertainments that also had exceptional creative elements this year?
Of course there were. But I'd suggest that a general disdain for mass-targeted product blinded many observers to the virtues that some blockbusters had which, say, that dreary as dishwater "Da Vinci Code" movie didn't.
If they really want to avoid another dull, viewership-losing Oscar ceremony this year, I can think of five titles to run for best picture that I (and in all but one case, the rest of America) just enjoyed the hell out of - and without putting our taste receptors entirely on hold, either. The Oscars being more of a popularity contest than a reliable yardstick of filmic excellence anyway, I hereby suggest the following action, comedy and horror films as an alternative to the usual classroom exercises.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest: The year’s biggest hit was the rare sequel that went to great lengths to give a guaranteed returning audience more than its money’s worth. This second seafaring adventure didn’t have the surprise of discovering Johnny Depp’s rum-punched performance for the first time, but it made up for that with insanely baroque production designs, off-the-charts effects (Davy Jones’ face, Kraken-related flying wire-work, that endless fight on the runaway water wheel . . .) and - though its determinedly dismissive critics failed to notice - intriguing character developments across the board.

X-Men: The Last Stand: Yeah, usually, if I had to choose between a Brett Ratner or a Bryan Singer movie, I’ll go with the elegant director of “The Usual Suspects� and the first two X-Men films over the Rush Hour guy. But this time, that just wasn't the case. Ratner’s third X-film captured the multi-characters with multiple issues nature of the best Marvel Comics better than any other film except . . . well, “X-2� is the only one I can think of. Plus, he turned this tale of government coercion to make mutants more like us into one of the more complex movie metaphors of the Iraq War that we’ve seen. Singer, meanwhile, made his “Superman Returns� into a strangely anti-climactic soap opera. By humbly following much of the course that his predecessor had charted, Rattner gave us the better superhero movie. I think some people reacted more to his name than to what he actually accomplished.

Borat: No, I’m Not Going to Write Out That Long, Ungrammatical Subtitle: Sacha Baron Cohen’s tour of America was by far the cleverest blending of reality and fake reality, politics and slapstick, and comedy and cruelty that our era of virtual/tabloid/yellingpundit/gotcha culture has seen yet. And with a wicked bite that exposes the only really possible comedy nominee, "Little Miss Sunshine," for the smug, wimpy contrivance it mainly is.

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby: And if you like your satire of American boorishness balanced with acknowledgment of our accepting, sometimes even aspiring to intelligent traits, this hilarious send-up of NASCAR culture and our attitudes toward it was by far the most perceptive, and funniest, comedy of the year. Never in the course of human history has saying grace been so enjoyable. And the cars were cooler than any gimpy old Volkswagen van.

The Descent: Least seen of my five-pack of fun (and most simply titled; Hmm, could a : Buff Chicks in Caves add-on have goosed the box-office?), this superbly staged fright film used such basic elements as lighting and claustrophobic settings to create an incredible sense of unease well before any monsters showed up. And once they did, the fact that the all-female prey proved pretty darn capable of fighting back turned decades of genre gender exploitation upside down. Better than all of the other horror movies of 2006 combined.

Of course, an Academy Awards that substituted "Casino Royale" or "Apocalypto" for any of the above titles would be cool, too.
Wait, did I just use Academy Awards and cool in the same sentence? Well, I started this blog as a flight of sheer fancy; guess it ends that way, too.

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