NFL fun

I'm getting progressively better with these picks, putting together a six-win week last week. However, I still stink something awful. We'll see if I can get the lovin' feeling back.

Carolina (+3) at New Orleans
What's worse right now? The disappointingly awful Saints or the thought of David Carr starting another game for the Panthers? It's not a fun choice either way, but I'm thinking the Saints get off the schneid finally.
New Orleans 24, Carolina 17

Jacksonville (-2) at Kansas City
To be honest, I didn't think the Chiefs would get their second win until November. I also didn't think that USC would lose to Stanford either. Anyway, the Chiefs, despite their win over the Chargers, still aren't that potent. Against J-Ville, that doesn't work.
Jacksonville 19, Kansas City 13

Detroit (+3.5) at Washington
I'm tempted to give a homer pick here. The Lions are my boys and even though they always lose to the Redskins, I feel like something is different. Though if you pattern your betting after my picks (which is depraved considering how horrible I've been) I'd stay far away from this one.
Detroit 23, Washington 21

Atlanta (+8) at Tennessee
The Falcons have actually been pretty decent the last couple weeks, making me look pretty foolish. However, Vince Young and the Titans are humming and I can't see the Falcons competing on the road.
Tennessee 26, Atlanta 14

Miami (+5) at Houston
The Texans inexplicably dropped a game with Atlanta last week, harkening back to the days of Texan yore - or at least, all five years of it. However, the Dolphins are plum awful and aren't winning this game on the road.
Houston 24, Miami 14

Seattle (+6) at Pittsburgh
Just what I wanted to see today - the rematch of Super Bowl XL. Seriously, what do you remember about that Super Bowl, except Jerome Bettis dancing around? It wasn't a cool Super Bowl and I'm not sure how cool this matchup will be. I do expect Seattle to cover this time though.
Pittsburgh 21, Seattle 17

Cleveland (+16.5) at New England
Since coming back to the NFL in 1999, the Browns have definitely been on the short end of some whopping spreads. But for once, this high spread has nothing to do with them, as Cleveland has actually shown some spunk. However, New England is pretty much playing the emotionless cyborg, kind of like this guy. The Pats are that good, which is good, because most of Cleveland will be paying attention to the Indians anyway.
New England 35, Cleveland 17

Arizona (-3.5) at St. Louis
Do you really trust the Cardinals as a road underdog? Even with a Rams team that has Gus Frerotte, the guy who injured himself butting his head against a brick wall during a touchdown celebration, starting at quarterback? I don't either. St. Louis gets a win.
St. Louis 21, Arizona 20

By the way, there have been many other terrible injuries, such as Bill Gramatica tearing his ACL during a field goal celebration (depicted here ), and Milton Bradley's recent torn ACL. Just when you think sports couldn't get any stranger....

N.Y. Jets (+3.5) at N.Y. Giants
Who will be eliminated from postseason contention faster? The loser of this game or the Yankees? I don't think there will be a plague of bugs for this game, but I wouldn't expect this battle of Gotham (played in New Jersey fittingly) to be all that entertaining.
N.Y. Giants 20, N.Y. Jets 16

Tampa Bay (+9.5) at Indianapolis
Once again, the Colts seem to be favored by a ridiculous amount. Considering that Tampa Bay has been one of the NFL's surprises, they should give the Colts a game. But I thought the same about Denver, which was doing all right against Indy last week before Travis Henry went on a reefer binge . I don't care though, I'm picking Chucky and the Bucs .
Indianapolis 27, Tampa Bay 22

San Diego (+1) at Denver
Could the Chargers really be this bad? Should Denver be 0-4? Why am I still up writing this? Who invented the pet rock? A ton of questions in this game and quite honestly, I don't know the answers. Anything, short of LaDainian Tomlinson stabbing Norv Turner in the eyes, could happen. So when I feel that, I'll take the dog. Giddy up Chargers!
San Diego 21, Denver 16

Baltimore (-3.5) at San Francisco
A reunion of sorts, as the starting quarterback of the Ravens' 2000 Super Bowl champions plays against them as the starter for the Niners. Alex Smith is apparently gone for a while, so this is Trent Dilfer's team. With apologies to the prepdog, who apparently taught Dilfer how to play soccer and read (I made one of those up), I don't have much faith in the Niners.
Baltimore 20, San Francisco 9

Chicago (+3) at Green Bay
Is it me, or is it weird to see former Cleveland Cavalier center Brad Daugherty as a NASCAR correspondent? The NBA and NASCAR seem to go together like ketchup and peanut butter. Anyway, the Bears are in trouble and Brett Favre is getting Chris Berman excited again. Any girl wearing leather should hide.
Green Bay 24, Chicago 13