Week 5 NFL picks

It's October and I'm still below .500 in the NFL. Either I take too many risks or I really stink. I'm going with the latter. Anyone who uses these picks for anything besides mocking is really misguided. But I'm going to press on anyway.

Indianapolis (-3) at Houston
Something was seriously off for the Colts before their bye. Except for one quarter against the Vikings, Indy has been beaten down in the early part of this season. The Texans played well enough to win in Jacksonville last week and are finally at home for the first time. An emotional Houston crowd makes the difference.
Houston 23, Indianapolis 20

Tennessee (-2.5) at Baltimore
The Titans, with the aged Kerry Collins at quarterback, weren't expected to be undefeated. In fact, I think I've picked against them twice. Well, I'm not doing that. While Baltimore has a good D, Tennessee's is tops in the NFL right now, which should do the trick against Joe Flacco.
Tennessee 17, Baltimore 10

San Diego (-6.5) at Miami
The Chargers still aren't clicking on all cylinders, but they seem to be going in the right direction. I thought Miami's use of the "Wild Hog" offense with Ronnie Brown at quarterback was great, but something tells me the Chargers will be ready for it.
San Diego 31, Miami 20

Kansas City (+9.5) at Carolina
The Chiefs surprised everyone last week by beating the undefeated Broncos. It's an aberration though, as I don't see any way KC repeats that performance against Carolina. Panthers will romp.
Carolina 28, Kansas City 10

Washington (+6) at Philadelphia
This game pretty much hinges, at least from spread concerns, on Brian Westbrook. The Skins were impressive last week at Dallas and would get major kudos for winning in Philly. However, the Eagles can't afford to fall any further behind in the brutal NFC East. They'll win a close one.
Philadelphia 23, Washington 21

Chicago (-3.5) at Detroit
Amazingly the Lions swept the Bears this year. It's not amazing because the Bears were good, but because Detroit very rarely is competent enough to sweep anything. At least Matt Millen is gone from the Lions, but they'll have to be satisfied with baby steps for now.
Chicago 27, Detroit 19

Atlanta (+3.5) at Green Bay
Normally this would be an easy pick for the Packers, but Aaron Rodgers' up in the air status could make this game a Matt Ryan vs. Matt Flynn QB matchup. Still, I think the Pack have enough to cover this spread even with Flynn. They'll depend on Ryan Grant and the defense.
Green Bay 20, Atlanta 13

Seattle (+7) at N.Y. Giants
The Seahawks are still a hot mess, even after the bye week. They are basically reduced to either running the ball 50 times, which shouldn't work against the Giants, or throwing the ball strictly to their tight ends. Plaxico Burress is out, so the Giants will grind out a low-scoring win.
N.Y. Giants 21, Seattle 13

Tampa Bay (+3.5) at Denver
With the frequency that these two teams put the ball in the air, this game could take nearly four hours. Denver is basically reduced to winning in shootouts, which they should be able to do at home. Count on Brian Griese to throw a crucial interception for Tampa as well.
Denver 34, Tampa Bay 28

New England (-3) at San Francisco
The Pats were embarrassed by Ronnie Brown and the Wild Hog two weeks ago, so you know that Bill Belichick was doing everything short of ritualistic abuse during New England's bye week. Frisco has improved, but I'll take the Pats here.
New England 19, San Francisco 14

Buffalo (+1.5) at Arizona
Everytime I pick the Cardinals I look stupid. Then again, you could replace the word Cardinals with 10 other names and the statement would still be factually correct. I'm picking Buffalo out of pure spite.
Buffalo 27, Arizona 21

Cincinnati (+16.5) at Dallas
The game will stink, but seeing Chad Ocho Cinco and Terrell Owens clash in a touchdown celebration contest would sure be entertaining. T.O. will be happy, for this week at least, as the Cowboys should roll over the pourous Bengals defense.
Dallas 41, Cincinnati 17

Pittsburgh (+5) at Jacksonville
The Jaguars seem to do really well against the Steelers, who have Mewelde Moore starting at running back this week. Mewelde Moore went to Tulane, which got killed by Army this week. I'll take the Jags and the points.
Jacksonville 21, Pittsburgh 14

Minnesota (+3) at New Orleans
Quite frankly, I'm sick of picking the Vikings just to have them lose - or picking against them just to have them win. I'm messed up either way, but I'll take the home team as a default.
New Orleans 28, Minnesota 20

Straight up: 28-31. Against the spread: 27-31-1.