Today, the beach is closed -- the Dodgers are at another beach, in San Diego, trying to keep Manny Ramirez in the lineup. It'll open up again, on schedule, July 19. And July 26. And Aug. 9 and 23. And Sept. 6 and 20. And even Oct. 4. With floppy hats and sandals and beach towels to be given away.

With today's column on the Dodger Stadium "Bleacher Beach" experience (linked here) come a few more snapshots to share:

== First, you need to adjust to the view:

== Amazing enough, it looks pretty much the way when the park opened nearly 50 years ago (except we must know how to grow better grass these days):

== And, if you're not afraid of heights, here's the look down on the Dodgers bullpen from way up yonder:

== Back at the entrance ...

You come in under the volleyball net, get a pass to wear around your neck, get lei'd and then are given one of the freebies for the day. Again, the leis aren't optional. They must be worn. It helps when later, you go through the entrance to use the restroom, and the guard stops you to see your ticket. Well, heck, the ticket's back at the seat. But I have this lei on. And another pass around my neck. And there's a big "X" stamped on my hand. And I look bloated. Isn't that enough of a hint?

Also, if you're not into the loud, pulsating music, then avoid Sir Mix Enough and his partner, Mr. Scratchy, as they put on as much Michael Jackson as one can stand. It's loud enough to almost drown out "God Bless America" during the seventh-inning stretch.

Because the game really is a country mile away, and the women wearing the sun tops are so close, the eyes must focus on what is more naturally pleasing. There's enough pleasing scenery to make sure that, when you get home, you can see what you missed on TiVo. We failed to catch the names of any of these young ladies. Our favorites had to be ... yes, those two below. They were in charge of the $6 beer pours. At the end of the day, they provide the most satisfaction.

OK, maybe she with the expertise in handling the garden hose is more necessary in the long run. So, too, is escaping to the mister tent (not to be mistaken for Mr. Tent) provided by BigFog, the same guys who have the fans in the team's dugouts. Still, we're not sure how this kid was able to watch any of the game. We saw him almost the entire afternoon stuck under the mist. With a head of hair like that, it's understandable. But eating hot dogs under there as well?

And yes, it was a surprise to see Manny Ramirez up there -- three flights above "Mannywood" -- enjoying the food as well with his people.

So what did we leave out?

The cost of tickets ($45 before hand, $50 at the game, or $35 if there's a group of 10 or more) ...

What kind of sunscreen to bring (45 before hand, 50 at the game, never 35) ...

You know, all that information is at the Dodger site (linked here, at dodgers.com/beach). We're not here really to sell you on anything. It's just that, if the beach is your scene, then why not be seen here?

We'll even send you over to a couple of other reviews:

== At "Dodger Thoughts" blog (linked here)

== And one by Chris Erskine of the L.A. Times (linked here)

You ever get a chance to hear the late George Carlin dissect some of the problems he had with the phrase, "God Bless America"? Such as:

"Is that a request? Is that a demand? Is that a suggestion? Does God care any more about America than he does Mongolia, Transylvania, Pittsburgh, the Suez Canal or the North Pole? Why would God have a favorite country? And why would it be America out of all the countries? Because He likes our national anthem?"

== If we may continue that line of questioning, from the mountains to the prairie to the oceans foaming at the mouth: Why is "God Bless America" become a live performance during the seventh inning stretch at all Dodgers' home sweet home games this season? And during Sunday Angels' games, as well as those on the Fourth of July and Memorial Day?

Should we have a problem with this?

== No one has forgotten how the New York Yankees and Mets felt it needed to be done in the context of their games after the events of Sept. 11, 2001, but then it kind of was discontinued, and now . . . it's making some kind of a comeback?

Because? What's the proper decorum here?

== As far as the pace and rhythm of a game goes, does the extra couple of minutes spent having the song sung, bringing both teams out to the top step of the dugout to remove their caps and acknowledge the singer, kinda sorta maybe change the emotion and flow of the athletic event just a bit?

== Are you among the voices who contend that it's a bit of a stretch to have it during the seventh inning - it actually kinda cheapens the tone of the song a little, having it right before "Take Me Out to the Ballgame"? Would it not be more meaningful to play it before the contest starts?

== Did you know that when the New York Yankees do it, there's a rule in place that prohibits any fan movement during the playing of "God Bless America"? And that last season, one person (Bradford Campeau-Laurion, pictured here) who got up from his seat to go to the restroom during the playing of the song was apprehended by a NYPD officer and removed from the stadium? And this past April, that person filed suit against the team and the police, claiming he was the victim of religious and political discrimination, which makes him look all the more un-American by having to go to court to have his civil liberties protected? Doesn't all that, ironically, seem to devalue our freedom?

== If you knew that Jose Lima would be belting out "God Bless America" during the seventh inning stretch tonight at the Long Beach Armada minor-league game at Blair Field in Long Beach -- and it's true -- would that give you any incentive to attend?

== If you're one of the fans free to express his or her right not to sing along, are you OK if the person next to you is belting it very loudly? Even if it's Kate Smith?

== And don't you appreciate the fact that in this country, on this weekend, we can actually debate the merits of playing "God Bless America" at a sporting event without getting into some kind of name-calling, spit-slinging, physical confrontation about it? We can, can't we?

Our first Fourth of July as a nation with a president who doesn't look much like the previous 40-something.

That's USA, first class.

Our pledge of allegiance is to make sure we cover as much of the sports media topics as our brain will allow for the day.

We never take a holiday from learning. Such as:

== Remember when Michael Jackson performed at halftime of NBC's Super Bowl WhateverItWas in 1993 at the Rose Bowl? We tried to forget it (linked here)

== Will Leitch wonders: Which sport death would affect us like MJ's? Would it be ... MJ's? (linked here)

== Murray Chass wonders: Can there be guidelines set for sportswriters voting on baseball's Hall of Fame? (linked here). "Contrary to what some people think, baseball writers can make intelligent decisions," Chass writes. ... "Furthermore, if writers need someone to tell them how they should vote, they shouldn't be voting. It is a difficult task with which voters are faced, but we can each decide for ourselves what our guidelines should be."

== Ironic that money issues are what seems to have killed the Hollywood version of the book "Moneyball"? (linked here)

== Do you ever watch the FX channel? Especially since it dropped NASCAR? (linked here) Did you know TNT still did NASCAR, before reading this story? (linked here)

== ESPN's plans for the 2010 World Cup are ... what you'd expect from the world-wide leader in sports (linked here)

== Paul Maguire ... you can take a break (linked here)

== Steroid guessing ... another (delayed) take (linked here)

==AND FINALLY:

== A reader email worth presenting, as is:

"Tom, you tell it like it is. How about writing about the MLB network coverage and how it's progressing. In my opinion, it leaves a lot to be desired. They repeat over and over the same information until I want to change the channel. On tonight's Yankees-Mets telecast, Harold Reynolds tells viewers about the Alex Rodriguez steroid "allegations" - when we all know ARod confessed his sins already. Was Harold on vacation that day? These guys on the MLB network laugh at their own jokes even though they're not funny. They make Steve Physioc and Rex Hudler look like candidates for the Broadcasters' Wing at the Baseball Hall of Fame. Maybe if you write something about it, the network will try to get its act together? My young sons (huge baseball fans like myself) watch their crap and shake our heads over and over again. Thanks for listening ..."

There, it's been said. Well done.

And what the MLB Net does do well?

Today at 2 p.m., it airs a roundtable with Costas, Reynolds, Matt Vasgersian and Tom Verducci, covering the All-Star Game, Donald Fehr's legacy, interleague play, the economics of baseball and the impact of performance enhancing drugs on the game. This is the first roundtable MLB Network has conducted outside of its live, nightly studio show "MLB Tonight."

And the analysts don't pull punches when it contradicts what commissioner Bud Selig has in place for the game's future.

Such as, on whether the All-Star game outcome should affect World Series home-field advantage: "I've always viewed the All-Star Game as an exhibition, whether I was a kid or whether I was a player," said Reynolds. "To have the stakes of the World Series Game 7 on the line is too much."

Adds Verducci: "You say it's ridiculous that there is something of importance of a World Series home field advantage on the line. I don't think it's anymore ridiculous than how it was before. Odd year, American League gets it. Even year, National League gets it."

(AP Photo/Susan Montoya Bryan)

Brian Cherry of Phoenix rides by the Aspens along South Boundary Trail near Taos, N.M.

By Susan Montoya Bryan
The Associated Press

TAOS, N.M. -- Droves of tourists head to Taos every summer, ready to take in the area's art galleries, pioneer history and American Indian influence. After all, this is the place that inspired artists such as Georgia O'Keeffe and Ansel Adams.

But there's another group of tourists who are bypassing the galleries and museums in favor of trails along the rim of the Rio Grande gorge and forested ribbons of singletrack high in the surrounding mountains.

This is the other side of Taos, and word is spreading -- from Albuquerque and Santa Fe all the way to the South Pacific.

Doug Pickett, a longtime cyclist and owner of Taos Cyclery, said almost half of the calls he gets are from out-of-towners wanting to know about the area's most popular singletrack, a trail that was blazed more than a century ago by sheep herders who traversed the Sangre de Cristo Mountains.

"People call from Texas, California and all over the place saying 'We're going to do Taos in a couple of weeks and I've heard about South Boundary,'" Pickett said.

Greg Moretti heard about South Boundary Trail a couple of years ago from a friend who moved to Santa Fe and learned from the local bike shop that it was a "must ride."

Moretti was living on Saipan in the South Pacific when he and his friend planned a week of riding in the mountain bike meccas of the American West -- Moab, Utah, and Fruita, Colo. -- to train for an eight-day race in South Africa. Taos was worked into the trip.

"Of all the riding we did on our weeklong road trip, the South Boundary Trail was probably the most memorable ride," said Moretti, who now lives in San Francisco. "In the fall, the mountains and bright yellow aspens backdropped by the blue New Mexico sky were absolutely spectacular and unforgettable."

UPDATED AT 12:30 p.m.:

At this moment on NBC (10:30 a.m.), a large man in a red baseball cap and white jacket is trying to teach two overly chatty women, one whom we painfully can identify as Kathy Lee Gifford (only because of the "Saturday Night Live" skits that lampoon their stupidity) the best way to carve a hunk of cheese to look like Abraham Lincoln.

Even Matt Lauer is rolling over in his Fourth of July red, green and brown guacamole.

The peacock should be very proud of itself. It's one of its finest shows. Ever.

Oh, and at this moment in London, Andy Roddick is trying to fend off Andy Murray and make it into the finals at Wimbledon, to meet Roger Federer. Here's Murray arguing a call, via AP photo. That's all we got.

We can't see it until it's on, delayed, in an hour and a half. Maybe. We're not sure which of the men's semis they're going to air. Although the tape-delayed feed is already going to the East Coast viewers. And ESPN2 apparently already ran the Federer match live at 5 a.m. (Fang's Bites reveals that one linked here which we just updated). We're now a half-hour into Roddick-Murray, but we already know the outcome...

This isn't live? Anywhere? In today's world? On NBCSports.com, there's a slideshow offered of the match and explaining how it came out (we'll even be gracious enough to not give it away if you're interested in waiting).

NBC owns the rights for U.S. TV when it gets this deep into the most famous tennis event in the world. How does this serve the public? How does Wimbledon organizers allow such a thing? Where's the BBC when you need it? ESPN2, which has been doing it since the first match, has its hands tied. Even with ESPN360.com.

Oh, wait, KNBC has just broken into its regular-scheduled mind-numbing post-"Today" show for a news conference where a policeman is standing outside Staples Center to explain how Tuesday's Michael Jackson memorial service will go. Yes, it's "live."

Bitchin'.

Earlier this week, NBC's gameplan to delay things during the day until people could watch them at a more convenient time -- remember, this is the philosophy in carrying the Olympics -- drove more sports viewers crazier than I can care to remember.

Richard Sandomir launched a column in the New York Times (linked here) that began: "If NBC Sports can't carry Wimbledon matches live, especially crucial ones, it shouldn't carry Wimbledon at all. The network's tape-delay dance -- and its excuses -- have grown tired."

There are others, without the same juice as the NYT, also lodging Internet complaints about the absurdity of this (linked here), but does NBC care? Does it have to?

An SI.com post this morning of its "feuds of the week" (linked here) pits "tennis fans" vs. "NBC Sports" for its Wimbledon coverage. That's not a fair fight. We always lose.

The verdict they reached: There's no reason that we should have to resort to finding back alley online foreign TV streams if we want to watch a match unfold. If you can't figure out a schedule to get a maximum audience, let somebody else try.

Behold The Man Wall:

Yours, for just $14,900. Plus shipping.

A Bradenton, Fla., company named Hybrid Space Furniture (linked here) has come up with what looks like a cross between a "SportsCenter" control room, a cigar lounge and a Maloof brothers Vegas suite rolled into one.

Scratch, scratch.

If you're curious, this wall unit contains:

== A 52″ Vizio Flat Panel LCD HDTV
== Two 26″ Vizio Flat Panel LCD HDTVs (to watch other games on while something is on the main TV)
== 1200 watt Panasonic 5.1 Home Theater System
== A DVD player with 5-CD changer
== An iPod docking station
== Two wireless surround sound speakers
== Across the top, a live 7-foot sports ticker with built-in computer (with one free year of service)
== A full-size built-in beer refrigerated beer keg with tap
== A 1000 watt microwave oven
== Two cigar humidors (holds 25 each) complete with gauges
== And a 32-bottle wine rack

You can have it customized with your favorite team colors. And a remote control that takes care of all the screens.

To talk about this big boy toy, co-designer Vince Caruso: "This is the Taj Mahal of Man Room accessories, it has everything but the kitchen sink and we only left that out to make room for the full-size kegerator. This is the first time that a company is offering one-stop shopping for a Man Room, it would take weeks to build something of this magnitude yet we can have it to you in three to five days.

"Besides looking like something you would see on MTV Cribs, the Man Wall is extremely practical in that it will fit in almost any size room. Additionally, by having all of the components fully integrated you no longer see that rats nest of cables and wires normally associated with numerous components."

More information: www.themanwall.com or (941) 752-4424

Or, just pretend you have one and use that $15,000 on ... aw, we can't think of anything better.

Vin Scully will let the dogs at Petco Park do their thing when Manny Ramirez steps to the plate a few minutes past 7 p.m. tonight as the Dodgers face the San Diego Padres, all in front of the Prime Ticket cameras (plus any edition of ESPN's "Baseball Tonight" or "SportsCenter" that allows them to carry it with expressed written consent of Major League Baseball).

For tonight's game, Prime Ticket has added a right-field camera to allow another angle to shooting Ramirez when he's in left field. A special edition of "Dodgers Live" before and after each game of the series will have Steve Lyons and Patrick O'Neal in front of Dodgers dugout, with Michael Eaves reporting and live Twitter updates of his every move.

For Saturday's game (Channel 11, 1 p.m.), Fox has the Dodgers-Padres as a regional game to 46 percent of the country, but it plans to cut into its coverage of New York Mets-Philadelphia and Detroit-Minnesota to carry Ramirez's first-inning at-bat live to the entire country. Says Fox Sports president Ed Goren: "Being the personality that he is, there will definitely be a curiosity factor as Manny Ramirez returns from suspension. We think many baseball fans will be interested to see how he's received by the fans in San Diego. It could forecast how fans will react in other National League parks the Dodgers visit the rest of this season."

And Colleen Dominguez isn't sure when she's going to get time off from the Manny beat -- at least through July 16, when he plays his first home game in Mannywood.

"Then, I'm on vacation," the ESPN reporter said from the Dodger Stadium media room on Wednesday afternoon. "I promised my daughter for her high school graduation (from La Canada High) that we'd go somewhere. But there I was, at her graduation last week, reading and sending emails about Manny. My mother was giving me grief for it. But they all know, my family life revolves around Manny these days."

That's a rough life. Especially when Manny won't even talk to you.

We wrote about all that in today's column (linked here). But beyond Manny:

== TBS releases the two MLB 32-man All-Star rosters (likely without Manny) in a special Sunday at 10 a.m. Ernie Johnson does the show with Dennis Eckersley, Cal Ripken and David Wells, followed by Milwaukee-Chicago Cubs game from Wrigley Field at 11 a.m. with Chip Caray and Buck Martinez.

== NBC's criticized delayed coverage at Wimbledon continues with the men's semifinals (today, noon to 5 p.m.) but it goes live for why its there in the first place -- the women's finals (Saturday, 6 a.m. live, with the Williams sisters) and men's finals (Sunday, 6 a.m. live, likely with Roger Federer). Still, rain could appear and make the real story of Centre Court be the roof.

Says play-by-play Ted Robinson on the new contraption: "It's the year the roof. I couldn't help but think when the roof closed (Monday) for the first time during play that all during the classic final last year (on a Sunday, between Federer and Nadal), especially in the fifth set, it was impossible to not every so often have to take your eyes off this classic match to glance up to the sky and ask, 'Are we going to be able to play? Is it going to rain again? Is it going to get too dark? Is this match actually going to have to come back and finish on Monday?' What the roof does is make sure none of that is ever a factor again in a championship match.
"When the All England Club does something, they do it well and they do it right. Imagine trying to put a roof over Wrigley Field or Fenway Park and that's what it's like trying to cover Centre Court. It's a smaller piece of real estate, but the fact that they put this modern structure on without compromising it at all or altering the character of this traditional venue, I think the club did a great job."

== This week's list to ponder: NBC celebrates its 30th year of "Breakfast at Wimbledon." When it first did this in 1979, it had to pre-empt its children's programming lineup -- not an easy thing to pull off with the FCC regulations. The cartoons preempted on that Saturday morning were:
- Yogi's Space Race
- Godzilla Power Hour
- The New Fred and Barney Show
- Kroft Superstar Hour
- Fabulous Funnies
- Baggy Pants and Nitwits

== Versus launches its ninth year in a row of live Tour de France coverage on Saturday (5:30 a.m.), promising not to overload on Lance Armstrong's return ... but how can they promise such a thing? In 250 hours of coverage, Versus will "not be just iso-Lance," network president Jamie Davis told the Sports Business Daily. "It's an epic event. We want to cover the entire race." For the first time, the entire race is available in HD.

== Before ESPN carries live the one hour of the IFOCE Nathan's International July Fourth Hot Dog Eating Contest from Coney Island, N.Y. (9 a.m., with an immediate regurgitation at 10 a.m.), ESPN Classic lives up to its name with an encore performance at 4 p.m., preceded by every event prior to this year, going back to 2004, beginning at 11 a.m. And if you can't make it to the tube, it's all on ESPN360.com.

== The MLB Network has added Fox's Ken Rosenthal as an on-air contributor, as he joined the cast of "MLB Tonight" this week. He'll continue to work for FoxSports.com and MLB on Fox.

== CBS sends Jim Nantz and Sir Nick Faldo out to host the Tiger Woods-hosted AT&T National from Bethesda, Md., on Saturday (noon to 3 p.m.) and Sunday (noon to 3:30 p.m., Channel 2).

== Fox Sports West launches a new "In My Own Words" about the Angels' Torii Hunter, starting Monday at 10:30 p.m. after the Angels-Rangers telecast.

== The MLB Network has Bob Costas doing a sit-down interview with Cal Ripken Jr. (Sunday, July 5, 5 p.m.) to discuss the 70th anniversary of Lou Gehrig's famous farewell speech at Yankee Stadium. After that interview airs, the MLB Net will show the Academy Award-winning film "Pride of the Yankees" with Gary Cooper (6 p.m.)

== TNT has admitted it replaced Bill Weber with Ralph Sheheen on its NASCAR coverage the rest of the season, starting with Saturday's Coke Zero 400 at Daytona (5 p.m.). According to Internet reports, Weber apparently was involved in a late night incident last Friday night at the TNT hotel in Manchester, New Hampshire. He was sent home on Saturday. Sticking around for the ride Saturday are Kyle Petty, Wally Dallenback and Larry McReynolds . TNT's "Wide Open Coverage" means no national commercial breaks, instead going with onscreen sponsor graphics and other creative ways to get the ad word out.

== In addition to doing the women's and men's finals of the Coney Island, N.Y., stop on the AVP tour this weekend for NBC, Chris Marlowe and Paul Sunderland also call the women's semifinals Saturday (11 a.m.) and men's semifinals Sunday (11 a.m.) for UniversalSports.com.

AND FINALLY:

== We're not going to admit that we realized FSN's "Best Damn Sports Show Period" (official site linked here) finally ran out of steam. We only suspected as much when Chris Rose was too busy working MLB assignments, Petros Papadakis wasn't telling us that he'd be on for a guest spot, John Salley was busy being stuck on an island claiming to be a celebrity, and whoever else came and went essentially went away.

We got a sniff of things when Deadspin ran this note earlier in the week (linked here) and we were still not moved to TiVo it.

We've been anticipating the demise of the program since Day 1. It lasted eight years. More than 1,300 shows. It's part of Wikipedia history, referred to now in the past tense, like Michael Jackson (linked here).

And what does the show have to show for itself?

It continues to appear as a living, breathing thing in its "list" shows, and clips will also crop up as they did during last Saturday's Fox MLB pregame show when Rose did an interview with the Angels' Torii Hunter -- and they replayed the time Hunter mowed down Rose in a home-plate catcher simulation.

If there's a best and worst highlight reel for BDSSP, we're on the lookout. Until then, a few YouTube clips for the road, with as few Tom Arnold appearances as possible (except for this "fight" he gets in with Michael Strahan):

That's the good, old version, with Dick Enberg as the host. With an occasional appearance by ... click on above to see.

Tuesday through Friday on ESPN Classic, at 11 a.m. They kind of snuck it back on the air starting on June 2.

Like Friday's episode: The Boston Celtics against the 1957 Milwaukee Brewers.

Or, on July 9: The Los Angeles Dodgers against the Brooklyn Dodgers.

Here's some background on the show taped down at the KTLA studios on Sunset Blvd., in the mid '70s (linked here).

As part of inquiring with the local media as to what they think the reaction will be to Manny Ramirez's return to the Dodgers' lineup on Friday, one of the respondents was Jeanne Zelasko, the new DodgersWIN.com play-by-play voice and host of the Jr. Dodgers Show, who has two young kids of her own with husband (and KABC-Channel 7 sportscaster) Curt Sandoval in Stevenson Ranch.

Zelasko's response:

The bottom line is that the future of this game rests in the hands of the kids. So, I went to the source and asked my 7-year-old son Trevor if he knew Manny was coming back:

"I know Mom. He missed 50-games for taking bad medicine."

"So, Trevor if you were at the game and Manny stepped on the field what would you say to him?"

"I would tell him that I'm glad to see him back."

"Should we cheer or boo Manny?"

"Mom, we should all cheer. God tells us to forgive everyone."

Maybe it's a little easier for the Sandoval family to get this subject into the conversation with a teaching moment, since sports is their business. For other L.A. families, it could be a little more dicey.

On Sunday's episode of "Outside the Lines" (ESPN, 6 a.m., ESPNEWS, 9 a.m.), the WWLeader sent Julie Foudy out to see who living amongst us will embrace the return of Ramirez under such cloudy circumstances. One of the families she talks to are the Kussin-Bordo family of Tarzana.

"Why would you take steroids?" says 8-year-old David Beltran of Downey. "There's no reason for it. You hit the ball farther, it doesn't make you a better person."

Foudy then has this quote from Beltran's mother, Adriana Lopez: "I felt a little upset that I had to explain things to him. It was kind of easier when it was Barry Bonds because we don't like the Giants anyway (laughs), but then when it's one of our own, we're like 'Oh my God, not Manny.'"

There's "God" and "Manny" in the same sentence again.

Manny has been embraced, like a lost child, in the City of Angels. If you think the reaction to him returning to Dodger Stadium on July 16 has the makings of a lovefest, wait until a week later -- on July 22, it's Manny Bobblehead Night.

Maybe it should be Manny Knucklehead Night. Presented by Larry Mondello.

"In Manny's favor is that his personality works for him and fits well into the L.A. culture," said Colleen Dominguez, assigned by ESPN to follow Ramirez as he's been working out in the minor leagues before Friday's comeback.

"But the quickest way to forgiveness is hitting the ball."

That's where the parents have to act like parents, and not like Dodger fans. If they're not happy with the way Manny's handled this punishment, say so to your kids. If you think he deserves forgiveness, say so to your kids. If you think he did nothing wrong, you'd be saying the wrong things to your kids.

Just don't be to hard on the Beaver.

One rallies behind a dancing monkey. The other rallies behind what could be the most delicious cheerleading squad in all of pro sports.

Who wins?

Monkeys.

We take seriously this annual "Ultimate Standings" that ESPN The Magazine publishes, now for the seventh time, in trying to determine which team in the four major pro sports -- baseball, basketball, football and hockey -- rank as far as fan experience and producing a return on an investment in tickets and support.

In other words, which teams connect best to their fans.

The Angels rank No. 1 of all the 122 teams. The Clippers rank last.

Couldn't see that one coming. Unless you were a fan of the Angels and/or Clippers.

As this July 13 issue of ESPN's oversized publication points out, "this year, the rankings are more important than ever," since fans have less money to spend. So, there is a method to figuring this out.

Using a Chicago consulting firm and research by the Warsaw Sports Marketing Center at the University of Oregon, the magazine surveyed 21 topics related to each team -- stadium experience, fan relations, affordability, players, coaching, ownership, titles won and, the best, bang for the buck -- and weighed each one to their importance. Do teams effeciently convert dollars from fans into on-field wins (regular and post season)? That's a big deal, but not as big as say, fan relations or desire to obtain quality players.

The Angels ranked no less than No. 16 in any of those categories, and did very well (top 5) in affordability, coaching and title track (a three-way tie with the Detroit Red Wings and St. Louis Cardinals). In the "Bang for the Buck" category, they were No. 6

The Clippers, meanwhile, ranked highest only in how they were ranked a year ago -- No. 82. Now, at No. 122, they're dead last also in coaching and players, and almost last in fan relations (121), title track (119) and "Bang for the Buck" (116). Only the stadium experience and ticket affordability make them less embarassing than the really should be.

In between, the rankings for the other L.A./O.C. pro teams:
No. 11: Ducks
No. 50: Dodgers
No. 51: Lakers
No. 95: Kings
No. 104: San Diego Padres (just for context)
No. 116: Oakland Raiders (again, for giggles)

You think living in New York helps a team relate to its fans? Not in this poll. Consider these N.Y./N.J. team rankings:
No. 45: Giants
No. 82: Mets
No. 93: Rangers
No. 103: Jets
No. 107: Yankees
No. 111: Nets
No. 115: Islanders
No. 121: Knicks

Yes, if it wasn't for the Clippers, the Knicks would be worse. You OK with that, Spike Lee?

So what do we take away from all this? In L.A., it's a big skewed up.

If you're enjoying yourself at a Clipper game, that's your fault.

If you're dissatisfied at an Angels game, you're doing something wrong. (Like, don't be in the parking lot when bullets are flying ... they've already cleaned up the rat problem).

If you're not quite sure how satisfied you are at a Dodgers or Lakers game, you're right about in the middle. You should be happier. It could be worse. This, again, was done before the Lakers' recent title, and the Dodgers' run to the best record in baseball. And in L.A., running in front matters most.

And, which team has Manny Ramirez on their roster.

Jelena Jankovic had 'em at Wimbledon on Saturday.

"It's not easy being a woman sometimes," the former world No. 1 tennis player admitted.

She just lost to 17-year-old American out-of-no-where qualifyer and 124th-ranked Melane Oudin in the fourth round, 6-7 (8-10), 7-5, 6-2. But apparently Oudin wasn't the one giving her problems.

"I had some women's problems," explained Jankovic. "All these things happen. What can I do? I tried my best. I've never had problems like that with my monthly cycle in the past. That was a first experience for me."

In a 24/7 news cycle, this story still seems to have some legs.

We all remember our first experience with this sort of thing. It's an embarassing moment. We're with our friends. We don't know how or what to do. We run to the bathroom, sobbing. Or we just gut it out.

For me, it was probably right in the middle of a Little League game. I'd just got into a fight with my girlfriend -- that can be tramatic for an 11-year-old. My head wasn't into the game when I went out to the park that day. Coach gave me the ball to pitch, but I couldn't find the plate. I made a couple errors when I got sent to the outfield. I threw my glove under the dugout bench and almost started crying.

What's the matter, son? Coach looked concerned, in a fatherly sorta way.

"Nuthin'," I said. But I knew -- it was women's problems. I stayed silent. I kept the pain inside.

Janovic was on a much bigger stage. She won the first set against Oudin, but then she had to take a medical timeout. She couldn't keep it secret.

"I was like a ghost, white in the face," Jankovic said. "I didn't know where I was. The physiotherapist came out and she asked me, 'Do you know what your name is?' I just saw blurry. I didn't know. It was a really strange feeling. I was scared and started to cry."

Tell us about it.

"After the first set, I felt really dizzy, and I thought I was just going to end up in hospital. I started to shake," she added. "I was losing consciousness."

Sounds like more than "women's problems."

Yet, if women only knew how much men would love to use the excuse of "women's problems" whenever something went wrong with their game.

What Alex Rodriguez has been able to do on the field despite all his "women's problems" is Hall of Fame stuff. How Dirk Novitski was able to perform on the basketball court this past season with all his "women's problems" is remarkable. And that has nothing to do with Violet Palmer officiating a Dallas Mavericks' game.

Sean Avery ... we're not even sure how he functions.

Don't even go down the path of Manny Ramirez and his fertility drug addiction. We're cramping up just thinking about that one.

I was late for high school basketball practice one day. My coach pulled me aside and asked what was up.

Women's problems, I said.

"You're afraid of getting your girlfriend pregant?" he asked.

No, but I am now. Thanks for putting that extra stress on me.

If more male athletes used the "women's problems" explanation as to why they didn't perform well, fans would understand.

Honestly, who hasn't been there? You can say you're leaving your personal life off the field, or court, or rink, to find the peace and serenity of focusing on the game or match. But then try it.

In the NFL, a women's problem usually starts with Paris Hilton. Matt Leinart and Brian Urlacher can attest.

Around Major League Baseball, it's Alyssa Milano. She somehow avoided Derek Lowe when he tried pitching for the Dodgers the last two seasons, but he had other women's problems.

Remember Anna Benson? Maybe the reason why Kris Benson , the first pick of the 1996 MLB draft, hasn't done much in his big-league career since 2007 is because of a torn rotator cuff. The fact he's still sitting on the Texas Rangers' Triple-A roster these days waiting for a call-up that probably won't happen ...

We're not ruling out women's problems.

Especially in an IndyCar Race, when Danica Patrick cut them off coming out of the pits, and then she stormed over to scream at them afteward. What's Marco Andretti going to say? It's not a women's problem?

>(Someone told us the other day that to eat in the press room at Staples Center before a WNBA Sparks' game, the price went up from $7 to ... $20. And that's without a chef's carving station. ... Here's women's sports creating problems).

For at least a weekend, Jankovic's problems made Oudin an American tennis idol. She joined Venus and Serena Williams as the only U.S. women's players in the Round of 16.

Until today. Then Oudin had women's problems. It was named Agnieszka Radwanska, who beat the 5-foot-6 Georgia teen in straight sets.

When Oudin gets back stateside and starts to explain what happened to her -- the good and the ending, just as her parents were jetting in to see her play on late notice -- she would be wise not to use the reason "women's problems" to explain the end of her Wimbledon run.

She's still a teenager, with plenty of teenage problems in her life ahead. Save "women's problems" for when more believeable.

The Los Angeles Lightning of the International Basketball League head into its final regular-season game Tuesday night in Tacoma before beginning the playoffs with a best-of-three series in Monroe, Wash.

The winner goes to the IBL championship on July 18 at a site to be determined.

A season-best 28 points from former UCLA and NBA guard Darrick Martin, plus three others scoring 20 or more points, pushed the Lightning (14-3) to their sixth win in a row, 132-111, over the Nevada Pride on Sunday at Cal Lutheran. (Box score linked here)

Center Adam Parada was 10-of-12 from the field to score 25 points with 15 rebounds. Chris Ayer had 22 points and 15 rebounds. Juaquin Hawkins, one of six former NBA players on the team, had 21 points, nine rebounds and three steals off the bench. Former UCLA standout Toby Bailey had 13 points, 12 assists and six rebounds.

Martin, the former Clippers point guard, was 7-of-13 from 3-points and scored 20 of his 28 in the final two quarters.