You stupid, stupid fantasy players


CBS’ press release today touting its coverage on “The NFL Today” included this note:

Last week, analyst Solomon Wilcots, who was calling the Miami-New England game, reported on THE NFL TODAY that Miami running back Ronnie Brown would get his first start of the season for the Dolphins. According to Dave Richards of, 76% of the fantasy players who had Brown on their team did not play him.

I saw the show. I saw Wilcots’ report. I don’t have a fantasy team. But I activated Brown anyway. Just to show I was smart. Because I don’t play CBSSports fantasy games. I have my own game. It’s in my head. I make up the rules as I feel like.

No, not really. I just made that whole story up.

(Trade secrets revealed below):
I rarely watch CBS’ pregame show. Especially since they took off that Thurston Long dude. it’s all New York based, and it smells New York based.
I never watch ESPN’s pregame show. Chris Berman. Enough said.
I most times catch Fox’s pregame show, after the NFL Network pregame shows.
I TiVo them all.
I erase most before even getting around to watch. I fast forward through the others in case something imploded.
Honestly, I’m too busy checking my financial portfolio, pouring myself a cup of Joe, and trying to assess where I’ll find the money to eat dog food when I hit the age of 65. Then I head out to El Burrito Jr. for a tamale, two hard tacos, a Diet Coke, and the newspaper to catch up on what I slept through the day before. That’s after going to church, to pray that I have money when I’m 65 and can afford a plate of cat food (I know I said dog food earlier, but I want some variety in my life).

So, how do you spend your Sunday mornings, fantasy geek?

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