Opening lines from the Dodgers’ home opener …


The stuff you come across while aimless roaming through the staggering patrons on the Dodgers’ first home game of the season:

== Lines for the women’s restroom are a tradition like no other. But never have we never seen the lines to the men’s restroom at Dodger Stadium snake around (is that the right term?) longer than what we witnessed on the loge level down the third-base line. Seriously, we thought it was the line for free beer, and we stood in it for about five minutes until we realized otherwise.

Oh, it was still a beer line. Just for the exit process instead of the entry.

== The last paragraph from the bio in the Dodgers’ new media guide of Frank H. McCourt Jr.: “He has four sons — Drew, Travis, Casey and Gavin, whom he has often said he hopes will someday take over as stewards of the Dodger franchise.” What did it say in the 2009 edition?

== Something that didn’t happen: There’s a Facebook page devoted to a “salute to Vinny Scully’s 60th Dodger Season” (linked here), asking people to download and print out a two-sided “Vin Scully Tribute Cheer” card and bring it to the game. Then in the bottom of the fourth inning, just before the first Dodger batter, they ask that, if you’re in attendance, you start chanting “Vinny! Vinny! Vinny!” hoping to get the entire stadium to do it. That is supposed to inspire Nancy Bea Hefley to start playing, “It Had To Be You” on the organ, which is supposed to inspire Vin to wave from his press box booth.
Nothing remotely like that happened in the fourth, fifth, sixth ….
There are 4,234 fans already listed as friends of this page. One game down not done, 80 to go.
Again, the direct link to the site:

== A Rhianna sighting in the special-people section behind the Dodgers dugout created … a buzz?

== OMG it must be true. Jill Painter just tweeted: #Rhianna, wearing a #Dodgers sweatshirt, was dancing in her seat after Manny’s home run. Does she think she’s less visible wearing the hood? (linked here) … and then added: #Rhianna puts her head down in mock embarrasment when #Dodgers play her son, “run this down.” After bf #Kemp homer, she danced.

Someday, we’ll learn this Twitter technology so it pops up in front of us on any screen nearby and we’ll ignore it like another cellphone call.


== A woman on the field level walking around with a T-shirt: “I ONLY KISS DODGERS FANS.” It was not Rhianna.
Considering the source here and not able to get my diptheria shot this morning, thanks, but we’ll pass. Unfortunately, they’re offering this Victoria’s Secret shirt to anyone who has $32.50 (linked here) and wants to appear to be appealing to guys with beer glasses.
Even my new pals in the restroom line weren’t impressed enough to get out of the procession.

== Someone with scary red dyed hair named Allison sang “God Bless America” during the California Mega Millions Seventh Inning Stretch. She was introduced as having some ties to “American Idol” and won some Kid’s Choice award. Her tat artist must be proud. Now, go buy a lottery ticket.

== More shopping ops: A stuffed teddy bear wearing a do-rag with the Manny dreds and No. 99 T-shirt. So cuddly. Until it gets a thorn in its paw, finds somebody sleeping in its bed or must go into the woods for 50 days to purge birth control medicine.

== Between-innings best reaction from the crowd: A video clip of people doing things you’d see on “America’s Funniest Videos” — guy rides bike into the back of a parked car, etc., with “Yakety Sax” playing. It’s really come to this? More fitting: A video montage of Steve Sax’s greatest throwing errors, played to the tune of … you know.

== Another roar for the dude who mouths the words to Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin'” … We’ll believe it when we find out he does this purely for fun and not for future profit.

== Promos already for “Dodger Action Figures” promo: On June 3, Kemp; On July 8, it’s Eithier; On July 22, it’s Manny. It’s not exactly what you’d imagine — they look like a cross between Stretch Armstrong and a character out of “Iron Man.” Not in a good way.

== Attendance was just announced as 56,000. A sellout. Again, creative accounting. There were plenty of rows in plenty of sections disguised as turquoise and tangerine. Just look at the game on TV and you’ll see the usual $600-plus yellow highbacks without any body in them (they could be back in the “free” buffet line, sure, but …).

== Didn’t spot the new FJohn Tailgate wagon that was supposed to be in the parking lot before the game. Oscar Meyer has its Weinermobile. This one just looks like another thing the Grizzwalds would take on a trip to the Grand Canyon:


Drive home safely and take your schedule magnet with you. …

Facebook Twitter Plusone Digg Reddit Stumbleupon Tumblr Email
  • gregb

    Remember about attendance in MLB, NBA and NHL…its the number of tickets issued. Not the number of butts in the seats. At least the No Fun League gives you both numbers.