In 140 characters or less, here are your do’s, don’ts and duhs about today’s Dodgers’ home opener against Arizona at Dodger Stadium:
First pitch: 1:10 p.m. Parking lots open an hour earlier than usual: 10:10 a.m. Ballpark access starts at 10:40 a.m.
History buffed: It’s No. 53 L.A. home opener, and No. 49 at Dodger Stadium. The Dodgers are 24-24 in D-Stadium home openers.
Limping in: The Dodgers played their first six on the road, in P’burgh and Miami, losing four of ‘em. It wasn’t really pretty.
Need a ticket? Most are sold. Some remain if you buy a mini-plan or season seat. Check dodgers.com/tickets. And StubHub.com. Kids under 3 free.
Essentials: Cap, glove, SPF 30, shades, credit card, binocs, cell phone (to tweet). Not allowed: Signs, noise makers, cans, bottles, frowns.
Pre-game meal: Potato breakfast burrito @ Tacos Villa Corona, Atwater Village; Mama’s Hot Tamales Caf @ 7th and Alvarado, opens at 11.
Arrive in style: Take the nat-gas shuttles from Union Station starting at 10:30 a.m.. Free if you have tix. Buck 25 one-way if you don’t.
An alternate (public) route: Take Metro Line 2 or 4 to Sunset./Innes, hike 10 min. up Elysian Park to the entrance. Good workout.
Traffic updates: Text DODGERS PARKING to 65246 for updated info. Or listen to KABC-AM (790) as you cruise in.
BP schedule: Dodgers are scheduled to take cuts from 10:15-11:15 and the Diamondbacks from 11:15-noon.
Sign us up: Maury Wills and Tommy Davis are at Autograph Alley, behind center field, starting at 10:10 a.m. Also try Aisle 27 field level.
Tailgate: Not allowed, but Farmer John has a new mobile truck in RF parking lot giving out smoked sausages. And VIP lounge with 55-inch TVs.
National anthem: The honor goes to Grammy Award-winning country star LeAnn Rimes. Because Slash wasn’t available?
Ceremonial first pitch: The honor goes to Will.i.am of the Black Eyed Peas. Because Snoop Dogg wasn’t available?
Heads up: That’s a group of U.S. Navy FA-18C Hornets from Strike Fighter Squadron 97 doing the fly-over while Rimes sings.
King for a moment: For some reason, it’s Larry King asked to proclaim “IT’S TIME FOR DODGER BASEBALL.” Why not Vin?
National audience: The MLB Network will carry the Prime Ticket telecast for everyone to see. Except in L.A. and AZ.
Food run: No change in concession prices across the board. Dodger Dog: $5 Beer: $6-13. Try going after 2nd inning. Beer stops in 7th.
New grub: A two-pound pretzel called the “Victory Knot” at CPK stands. W/ 3 dipping sauces in a pizza-sized box. Serves 4.
Making a comeback: Spicy picante dogs; fish tacos at Camacho’s; Dippin’ Dots at carts on field and reserve levels.
Healthy grub: Carts around park offer up curried chicken lettuce wraps, fresh fruit salads, California rolls and gluten-free beer.
Need help: New Guest Relations Centers @ reserve section 39-40, loge section 112-114, field section at baseline box club and LF pavilion.
Lasting memories: Be nice to the Fan Photo person, pose for a free shot, only buy (if you want) online at printroom.com.
Celeb sightings: Probably. But no Jamie McCourt. Lawyer says she won’t make it out. Still waiting to clean out her office.
Short shop: New customized jerseys in souvenir shops. Opening Day T-shirts, pens, fitted hats. And Manny wigs are back.
Foul ball territory: With hard throwers Dodgers’ Clayton Kershaw and D’backs Ian Kennedy, go loge (sects 101-122) or reserve (sects 1-10).
7th-inn. stretch: Stand for “God Bless America.” Turn toward the press box and wave up to Vin Scully during “Take Me Out To The Ballgame.”
The home run: The Union Station shuttle picks up behind CF and runs up to 45 mins after the last out. Starts heading back in 7th inning.
Post-game meal: Lines often long at Philippe’s in China Town and Langer’s near MacArthur Park. Find Tommy’s chiliburger on Rampart.
Post-game margarita to wait out traffic: Malo on Sunset in Silver Lake. With chips and ground beef/pickle tacos.
An excuse to get the afternoon off: Need to see tax specialist to get an extension. Will explain later. Be back ASAP. Or Wednesday AM.