It’s Out of the Question: Boston may be strong, but L.A. stronger with Olympic-ness

0524toonwassermanIf we’re going for the big dig here, what’s at the existential core of Angelinos suddenly compelled to get all giddy up onto the five-ringed bandwagon, waving furiously to get the USOC’s attention as it tries to regift the 2024 Summer Olympics bid?

By what remote chance do any of this have to do with a new-found  opportunity to stuck your sun-tanned tongues out at pasty Bostonians who apparently have again shown their true colors – the revolutionaries now don’t want any part of putting out a world-wide welcome mat that might bring total strangers and foreign currency into their common boundaries?

Truly, what would be their incentive to start knocking down historically protected Dunkin’ Donut sites and replace them with an athletes’ village? Or an opening ceremony site? Or a swimmin’ hole?

And which Kennedy is going to pay for it?

No need for a MIT nitwit to draw up plans of re-dragging the Charles River, piling up construction bills and overruns that they could actually improve the city’s infrastructure yet still won’t appease those who long for the return of the original Boston Garden over that wicked fancy carport they’ve built for the Celtics, Bruins and no WNBA team.

(To that point: There has been a chart posted by TheOnion.com about what costs Boston should be concerned about, and it did include that $175,000 would have to be set aside for a “study delineating exact ways hosting Olympics will devastate local economy for decades to come.”)

Beantowners can just admit it: Their bean-counters don’t want to be bothered. Or, as a L.A. News Group editorial pointed out, they showed “exactly the right attitude, a healthy skepticism” about how all this could be very taxing on their resources. Before they officially put their John Hancock on the USOC’s documents of sovereignty, they did the predictable thing: They ran to the old North Church and started whaling about everything in public.

(There is one collective goal here between Boston and L.A.: Neither wants to see Ben Affleck running with a ceremonial torch on the Freedom Trail, unless it leads to something disastrous. Gronk, however, could be another story.)

The Dodgers’ own healthy skepticism when they’ve gone dumpster diving in Boston has come with absorbing the problem contracts of players such as Manny Ramirez, Carl Crawford, Josh Beckett …

You’re welcome.

And sorry about how Hanley Ramirez has worked out for you so far. Too late to “bang a uey” on that one.

Boston can stay focused on parochialism and protecting the U.S. stars and stripes. Los Angeles will continue to represent flexibility, creativity and International Friendship Day (it’s Sunday, for those who didn’t ge the memo).

So with all that in mind, someone let Wasserman, Garcetti and whomever becomes the new Ueberroth know that we’re going with the slogan “L.A. Stronger.”

Like the Olympic motto, about being faster and higher and all that business, OK?

Just as long as we’re all in agreement that we’re doing this for the right reasons. …

More questions to be answered will be at this link soon …

 

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