Not another pucker

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dodgerkisscam11.jpg

Does anyone out there know the proper ettiquette when it comes to having your face plastered up on the Kiss-Cam at a ballgame or arena?
Is there a way to kiss and don't tell about it?

It hasn't happened to me. Yet.

Or to you either. Probably.

But you know its going to.

It happened to Homer and Marge Simpson on the season-ender of "The Simpsons." They were at a Springfield Isotopes game when they appeared on the Kiss-Cam.
"Look, Homer, we have to kiss, the giant television is telling us," says Marge.
They can create an entire episode around that. You could be scarred for life because of it.

A friend of mine named ... naw, I won't embarass her anymore ... was on the Kiss-Cam, during the NBA Finals at Staples Center a couple of years ago. Problem is, they put her on with some stranger. She curled up into a ball and slinked out of the camera shot.
Isn't that an invasion of privacy? She hasn't lived it down with our group of pals. What was she supposed to do?

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I saw two guys once put on the spot on the Kiss-Cam. What are they supposed to do, amuse the crowd and swap some spit?

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Former Prez George Bush and his wife/mother Barbara were put on the Kiss-Cam in Houston (Enron Field, right?) They did it. Isn't that just wrong?

davidhortonkisscam.jpg

A few years ago, a guy showed up a Cincinnati Reds game and got his mug on the Kiss-Cam. Turned out, he was violating his probation. It made the newspapers.

You know the girl is all into it. But what a guy supposed to do?
If he bails out, he looks like a schmuck.
If he does it out of pressure, he feels worse about it. Especially if he's there with a girl he's not supposed to be there with (c'mon, it happens).
There's got to be a way to deal with this.
Send in your suggestions. ASAP. Before you're hooked.

We're not against kissing, mind you. Some of the best moments in sports have involved kissing:

lpgakiss.jpg

We can't be sure, but didn't KISS play at Dodger Stadium once?

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Or go back to the day at Dodger Stadium when the ushers had to kick out two lesbians for making a circus out of it.

madonnaandbrit.jpg
If only that happened at more than just an awards show.

Whatever the case, a policy must be in place as soon as possible. For the rest of us to know how to act, what not is cool to do, or how to work this to our advantage.
Think fast. This could be you:

dodgerkisscam1.jpg



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Tom Hoffarth writes about sports and sports media for the Los Angeles Daily News.

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This page contains a single entry by Tom Hoffarth published on June 30, 2006 11:46 AM.

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